hlynn95
Anxious Loner
- Oct 2, 2021
- 44
I believe people say it's the "easy way out" because you are no longer facing life. I believe choosing death is sort of the easier way rather than living. Life is very hard... you have to get a job to survive or you're basically screwed. And I feel very lazy. I don't want to work (no one really does right?) but it's like we HAVE to make a living somehow or we'd be homeless. I've used my good looks to my advantage (I do online webcamming) but even there, I don't make much money cuz of how cheap people are. I don't think I can hold a job down. It's so hard, I don't like working. I'm not equipped for the real world. I miss being a child :( life was so much simpler than adulting... growing up truly sucks. I want to die so bad! To be alive is torture, to simply die is an easy exit (once suicidal method is achieved &/or if you get lucky and someone just shoots you). I oddly wish this would happen to me. That some angry lover from the past might appear and shoot me in my spine cord (the brain stem?) where it would instantly put me out. I am frightened and scared to see what is on the other side of life. Is it just pure nothingness? Probably so. But there still may be a chance of an afterlife. Something I actually look forward to knowing. I've always had a fascination with death and what awaits us after life.
That's how it is for me! I have no energy or motive to work. I just can't seem to do it. I have bad anxiety and fear starting up a job & actually making changes in my life.
Last edited:
