Venting Dumb breakup vent

[FailureToAll]

It's been 2 weeks and he's on my mind too much. I struggle sleeping because I can't stop thinking of him. Everything reminds me of him, music, TV shows, books, even on here seeing people talking about the same diagnosis he has or the medication he takes or their own relationship issues. I can't escape it, there's reminders everywhere. I can't even hate him because it was all my fault and I can only blame myself. I wish I was a better person who could maintain a relationship. If I knew I could be a better person I would beg for him back I would do anything to try and win him back but I know I'm just a broken person who causes problems and hurts us both. I just wish I was in his arms, I want him so badly, i just want comfort i want love that feels safe without all my paranoia and trust issues. He's so perfect and everything I could of asked for. He was so much better than me and I know I can never find anyone better than him. I keep hoping he will reach out even though I know it would be pointless if he did. I hate myself so much. I didn't deserve him in the first place I should be grateful for the love I had. But it hurts so much and I wish I hadn't met him I wish I didn't know how perfect someone could be for me because now no one will ever compare and even if someone did I know I'm too emotional to maintain a relationship. I want to erase all the memories it's so painful to keep thinking about. My life feels so empty without someone to love and without hope of someone to have a future with.

 

[rabbitmalice56]

I wasnt even a relationship and Ive only known her for less than 2 months but i dont know why i feel the same. I'm the one at fault too, just wish i didnt fucking met her by chance. I'm trying to leave her alone because its for the best but I literally cant stop thinking about her, i cant see anyone else like her.

 

[Garf125]

What did you do if you don't mind me asking?

 

[FailureToAll]

What did you do if you don't mind me asking?

Got overly upset over small things that were probably just in my head and made unfair accusations hoping for him to tell me I was wrong and reassure me but then he just started avoiding me to avoid conflict and that made my worries worse and I said a lot of things because I thought he hated me and I was upset and frustrated and started getting worse thoughts and It went on for days and I just spiralled. We both handled things badly but if I had just not gotten upset over a few small things then none of it would of happened. He had a lot going on and I should of been more of a support but I was too selfish and focused on my own feelings and worries.

 

[carnivalforone]

same exact thing except my ex gf, she was otherwise perfect i wanted to have a life with her i wanted to grow old and love her forever but she started distancing and i couldnt keep hurting myself for someone who never loved me as much as i did her. i tried so hard and it took me a year to realize that she never did the same for me. she was my reason to keep trying but now having lost her idk what to do anymore

 

[FailureToAll]

same exact thing except my ex gf, she was otherwise perfect i wanted to have a life with her i wanted to grow old and love her forever but she started distancing and i couldnt keep hurting myself for someone who never loved me as much as i did her. i tried so hard and it took me a year to realize that she never did the same for me. she was my reason to keep trying but now having lost her idk what to do anymore

I'm sorry you're going through this too. It really sucks:/

 

[With0ut]

It's been 2 weeks and he's on my mind too much. I struggle sleeping because I can't stop thinking of him. Everything reminds me of him, music, TV shows, books, even on here seeing people talking about the same diagnosis he has or the medication he takes or their own relationship issues. I can't escape it, there's reminders everywhere. I can't even hate him because it was all my fault and I can only blame myself. I wish I was a better person who could maintain a relationship. If I knew I could be a better person I would beg for him back I would do anything to try and win him back but I know I'm just a broken person who causes problems and hurts us both. I just wish I was in his arms, I want him so badly, i just want comfort i want love that feels safe without all my paranoia and trust issues. He's so perfect and everything I could of asked for. He was so much better than me and I know I can never find anyone better than him. I keep hoping he will reach out even though I know it would be pointless if he did. I hate myself so much. I didn't deserve him in the first place I should be grateful for the love I had. But it hurts so much and I wish I hadn't met him I wish I didn't know how perfect someone could be for me because now no one will ever compare and even if someone did I know I'm too emotional to maintain a relationship. I want to erase all the memories it's so painful to keep thinking about. My life feels so empty without someone to love and without hope of someone to have a future with.

some relationships are worth the pain, if both of you really think that you will ever work things out, maybe you should try. Honestly it's up to you, if you want to suffer without him and possibly get over him, or suffer through it with him and possibly find solid ground. I know how you feel it's how i feel about my girlfriend every day and i wish i could be better at being a good partner but i always manage to fuck things up. If you truly want a future with them chase it. i feel that too many loves are given up on when imo it's kind of the only good thing about all of this.

same exact thing except my ex gf, she was otherwise perfect i wanted to have a life with her i wanted to grow old and love her forever but she started distancing and i couldnt keep hurting myself for someone who never loved me as much as i did her. i tried so hard and it took me a year to realize that she never did the same for me. she was my reason to keep trying but now having lost her idk what to do anymore

i feel like my girlfriend is doing this to me right now and i don't know what to do, she hang out with guys she dosent know and friends instead of me, sometimes purposefully cancelling plans to hang out with other people. she never looks at me like she used to, and it feels like shit. i can't lose her and i really don't want to leave but it's genuinely killing me. i really want to fix things with her and i hope i can.