struggles_inc
life is a highway and i wanna wreck my car
- Jun 24, 2023
- 478
Hi everyone! I decided to post. Much has happened. It's just a vent though, I hope not to be too boring.
I'm currently starting therapy for my multiple sclerosis diagnosis. My doctors offered me a few choices and I picked the least dangerous (I hope) injection that doesn't kill my immune system. It's called Tysabri — maybe someone is familiar with it.
I also started psychotherapy. Ngl I don't visit my therapist too often, because it's kind of expensive for the most part, but I do manage a visit at least twice a month. I don't see much progress with it, but I wasn't waiting for a revelation. I mostly vent, get validation sometimes, and that lifts me up a bit.
I closed my old business and decided to open a new one in the EU. Maybe I'll talk about it later. I'm thinking of taking a break till winter to recharge after I closed my old project and fired everyone. It was a heavy decision but I have been thinking about it for quite some time now. Besides, the prospects of my new project are much more positive and bring me some kind of hope.
My health is fucked up. I haven't restored vision in my left eye and now I need to wear glasses because my right eye isn't doing well either. The fatigue is a battle that lasts from the moment I wake up to the second I fall asleep. It's daily routine at this point. I'm also about to have an operation, unrelated to my MS. Just a lot of health stuff.
I'm also extremely scared for my loved ones in Russia and my girlfriend's family in Ukraine. Russia is predicted to be drafting in late September, which may result in my friends getting killed. And my girlfriend's hometown in Ukraine is being extensively bombed. I'm too afraid for her family as well.
When I close my eyes, I wish that the moment could just freeze. The moment when everyone I love is alive, when the damage to my brain still isn't too severe, when the sweet fog of uncertainty still hovers over the bloodthirsty reality and it feels far away rather than closing in. I am truly terrified sometimes.
Still, I have to do something, so I prepare my business operations, do small tasks, have my little talks with my therapist and try to ignore the feeling of impending doom. Maybe if I don't look at it, it will pass me.
Also, I befriended some crows.
I'm currently starting therapy for my multiple sclerosis diagnosis. My doctors offered me a few choices and I picked the least dangerous (I hope) injection that doesn't kill my immune system. It's called Tysabri — maybe someone is familiar with it.
I also started psychotherapy. Ngl I don't visit my therapist too often, because it's kind of expensive for the most part, but I do manage a visit at least twice a month. I don't see much progress with it, but I wasn't waiting for a revelation. I mostly vent, get validation sometimes, and that lifts me up a bit.
I closed my old business and decided to open a new one in the EU. Maybe I'll talk about it later. I'm thinking of taking a break till winter to recharge after I closed my old project and fired everyone. It was a heavy decision but I have been thinking about it for quite some time now. Besides, the prospects of my new project are much more positive and bring me some kind of hope.
My health is fucked up. I haven't restored vision in my left eye and now I need to wear glasses because my right eye isn't doing well either. The fatigue is a battle that lasts from the moment I wake up to the second I fall asleep. It's daily routine at this point. I'm also about to have an operation, unrelated to my MS. Just a lot of health stuff.
I'm also extremely scared for my loved ones in Russia and my girlfriend's family in Ukraine. Russia is predicted to be drafting in late September, which may result in my friends getting killed. And my girlfriend's hometown in Ukraine is being extensively bombed. I'm too afraid for her family as well.
When I close my eyes, I wish that the moment could just freeze. The moment when everyone I love is alive, when the damage to my brain still isn't too severe, when the sweet fog of uncertainty still hovers over the bloodthirsty reality and it feels far away rather than closing in. I am truly terrified sometimes.
Still, I have to do something, so I prepare my business operations, do small tasks, have my little talks with my therapist and try to ignore the feeling of impending doom. Maybe if I don't look at it, it will pass me.
Also, I befriended some crows.
