Does anyone have a ideas for me, as thinking of running away to die?.....but I never wanna be found.....

[JJMaynard97]

I know I want to go, I don't wanna every be found. Just wondering if there is any tips out there. I'm very new to this. Don't wanna mess it up like I do everything in life.

Thankyou!
I have been thinking drowning as I can't swim. Would be nice if there's a way my body will never be recovered :-(

 

[waRmblanket]

If you were to drown just like that, almost certain you'll be found. I want a way to not be found either

 

[FuneralCry]

But if you are dead then how could it matter to you if you were found or not. But honestly I think that if someone never wants to be found then they would have to ctb somewhere very isolated that even hikers won't go near.

 

[JJMaynard97]

If you were to drown just like that, almost certain you'll be found. I want a way to not be found either

It's a hard one. Sorry your in the same situation as me. I've thought about it, but it's a tough one. I guess it's almost impossible. But I get found I want it to be were nobody knows if that makes sense, like in a different town or city.

But if you are dead then how could it matter to you if you were found or not. But honestly I think that if someone never wants to be found then they would have to ctb somewhere very isolated that even hikers won't go near.

Your right , to be honest I don't know what I want to do, I guess if I just can't then it doesn't matter. Somehow I feel i will fail at this too. Have thought about just shooting myself, setting myself on fire, jumping of the quarry near where I liv, having. Running in front of a car. I just have so many emotions going through my head. I'm a failure

 

[waRmblanket]

It's a hard one. Sorry your in the same situation as me. I've thought about it, but it's a tough one. I guess it's almost impossible. But I get found I want it to be were nobody knows if that makes sense, like in a different town or city.

I mean I've personally considered taking a trip to Japan and have a last stop at the forest that many people commit suicide and never return. I don't know too much about it, but I assume not many of those that want to make it out, go in.

 

[JJMaynard97]

I mean I've personally considered taking a trip to Japan and have a last stop at the forest that many people commit suicide and never return. I don't know too much about it, but I assume not many of those that want to make it out, go in.

I've heard about that, your right.
Thankyou for your response

 

[waRmblanket]

I've heard about that, you're right.

I've also thought about hanging myself near a very isolated tall tree near a cliff maybe? I think that's just my imagination thinking of a place, but not sure if it'll be isolated:/

 

[JJMaynard97]

I've also thought about hanging myself near a very isolated tall tree near a cliff maybe? I think that's just my imagination thinking of a place, but not sure if it'll be isolated:/

Me too!, Sometimes I let my imagination run wild, I guess that's why I'm in this. I'm scared man scared I can't see a future for me, but need to think of a way for ending the thoughts in my head.

 

[waRmblanket]

Me too!, Sometimes I let my imagination run wild, I guess that's why I'm in this. I'm scared man scared I can't see a future for me, but need to think of a way for ending the thoughts in my head.

I feel that. There's times where I don't see a future for myself because I don't want one, things just get so much harder the older you get. I'm still young and I'm absolutely struggling. Guilt is my worst enemy. It's kicking my ass so bad I don't want to compete with it anymore, I'll let it win. My anxiety has been so bad lately, it's getting worse and there's nothing I can do but ctb.

 

[Someone123]

If yoiu run away tro die you will very likely find that ctb is much tougher than you thought, especially if you don't have resources. Then some day a very nice person will come up to you and offer you food and a place to live. Then once they have you in this private place they will likely hold you captive and you will be used for sex slavery. Every day this happenes, traffickers are experts at trapping runaways. I hope you can find peace somehow, but please don't run away unless you are in imminent danger, traffickers are experts at trapping runaways.

 

[JJMaynard97]

I feel that. There's times where I don't see a future for myself because I don't want one, things just get so much harder the older you get. I'm still young and I'm absolutely struggling. Guilt is my worst enemy. It's kicking my ass so bad I don't want to compete with it anymore, I'll let it win. My anxiety has been so bad lately, it's getting worse and there's nothing I can do but ctb.

I'm sorry to hear that, my thoughts are with you. And me too. The future when I think of it makes my stomach turn. Lost my beautiful Girlfriend, who broke off with me. I don't blame her I'm a car crash. She deserves better. Just future without her is unbearable.
Miss her so much, she was my first Girlfriend but I love her so. Life without her will be torture.

 

[waRmblanket]

I'm sorry to hear that, my thoughts are with you. And me too. The future when I think of it makes my stomach turn. Lost my beautiful Girlfriend, who broke off with me. I don't blame her I'm a car crash. She deserves better. Just future without her is unbearable.

Believe me I get it, my best friend chose her boyfriend over me…they only dated for a few weeks lmao. But ever since then I've been mentally so shitty. I have no desire to make other friends bc I know they won't last. Everyone I seem to be friends with ends up leaving after a little. I miss my other friend too:(

 

[JJMaynard97]

Believe me I get it, my best friend chose her boyfriend over me…they only dated for a few weeks lmao. But ever since then I've been mentally so shitty. I have no desire to make other friends bc I know they won't last. Everyone I seem to be friends with ends up leaving after a little. I miss my other friend too:(

I totally understand and again so sorry for that, people say they will support you then just leave I hate it. The feeling of being lonely with no one. :( It's a constant pain we carry for sure.
Everyone leaves. & I've had 25 years of it. Don't wanna make it to my 26th in July, it'll be a lonely one. Hopefully I'll be long gone my then. Waiting for the bus to a permanent ending. I don't think I'll be remembered or missed. :( Respect to you

 

[waRmblanket]

I totally understand and again so sorry for that, people say they will support you then just leave I hate it. The feeling of being lonely with no one. :( It's a constant pain we carry for sure.

I've been lonely for a few years now. While I don't enjoy it, I don't show it. I lie to others and tell them I enjoy it and all about how I want to live by myself. Yes I want to live alone, but it's bc I don't like anyone, everyone bothers me and it would be very easy to ctb at any moment.

 

[absolomonisgone]

you will always be found because of dna fingernails etc but if you live or know game reserve and such you may not be found because the animals will eat you up but it is scaring because the animals may eat you before you die. my method is go to a game park and hang or take sn but fear lions and hyenas may eat me before i take the sn and that is not a good way to go with lions eating you up as you watch

 

[JJMaynard97]

I've been lonely for a few years now. While I don't enjoy it, I don't show it. I lie to others and tell them I enjoy it and all about how I want to live by myself. Yes I want to live alone, but it's bc I don't like anyone, everyone bothers me and it would be very easy to ctb at any moment.

I understand I know what you mean, if you have people around you it's harder to ctb. Again so sorry to hear about your situation.

you will always be found because of dna fingernails etc but if you live or know game reserve and such you may not be found because the animals will eat you up but it is scaring because the animals may eat you before you die. my method is go to a game park and hang or take sn but fear lions and hyenas may eat me before i take the sn and that is not a good way to go with lions eating you up as you watch

That's true, it's almost impossible for you to I guess vanish. I know I heard on a news a month ago or so that a actor went missing hiking hasn't been found since. A British actor in mountains in Las Angeles. Haven't thought of being eaten. Would-be a shit way to go. Especially if your still alive.

 

[Already Gone now]

I mean I've personally considered taking a trip to Japan and have a last stop at the forest that many people commit suicide and never return. I don't know too much about it, but I assume not many of those that want to make it out, go in.

The Aiokigahara forest to the southern slopes of Mt Fuji.... I get chills thinking how sad it must feel out there. People have said that it pretty much absorbs you immediately upon trekking in...
Many people get lost and are never found again.

you will always be found because of dna fingernails etc but if you live or know game reserve and such you may not be found because the animals will eat you up but it is scaring because the animals may eat you before you die. my method is go to a game park and hang or take sn but fear lions and hyenas may eat me before i take the sn and that is not a good way to go with lions eating you up as you watch

That death metal, fuck the world way to die. Get high as fuck on amyl nitrate and ctb on the teeth of a lion!

The Aiokigahara forest to the southern slopes of Mt Fuji.... I get chills thinking how sad it must feel out there. People have said that it pretty much absorbs you immediately upon trekking in...
Many people get lost and are never found again.

That death metal, fuck the world way to die. Get high as fuck on amyl nitrate and ctb on the teeth of a lion!

Wow, that's a death metal song title
CTBBBBBBB ONNNNN THE TEETH OF A LIIIIIIIIIIOOOOON!

 

[Already Gone now]

Me too!, Sometimes I let my imagination run wild, I guess that's why I'm in this. I'm scared man scared I can't see a future for me, but need to think of a way for ending the thoughts in my head.

The scene you paint in my mind saying about your wanting the tree overlooking the ocean, is similar to Tom Hanks in Castaway... I remember how he was so sad for failing his S.attempt with the rope he made and the tree breaking

 

[JJMaynard97]

If yoiu run away tro die you will very likely find that ctb is much tougher than you thought, especially if you don't have resources. Then some day a very nice person will come up to you and offer you food and a place to live. Then once they have you in this private place they will likely hold you captive and you will be used for sex slavery. Every day this happenes, traffickers are experts at trapping runaways. I hope you can find peace somehow, but please don't run away unless you are in imminent danger, traffickers are experts at trapping runaways.

Thankyou for your response, I've got some thinking to do for sure. :-(

 

[WorthlessCoward]

Wasn't there a guy who loaded his van and then went north from Canada until he disappeared?

 

[JJMaynard97]

The scene you paint in my mind saying about your wanting the tree overlooking the ocean, is similar to Tom Hanks in Castaway... I remember how he was so sad for failing his S.attempt with the rope he made and the tree breaking

I'm a Castaway, Nobody would remember this lowlife. I hate myself l, I want to die!! I'll do it in away nobody will expect. People just think I'm a attention seeker. But I have conversations in my head everyday. I'm a selfish person who doesn't deserve to liv.