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Manaaja

Manaaja

euROPE
Sep 10, 2018
1,474
I wish I could relive the times when I was happy. I wouldn't do anything or much differently though. I just want to experience that love and happiness again.
 
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L

LoveTakesManyForms

Student
Sep 9, 2021
175
It definitely could have been a lot better, worthwhile even, so yes, however I acknowledge that events beyond my control caused my pain free life to vanish forever, and that's what I want back the most
I wish I would have reached out for help sooner. I might not have ended up where I am now.
Same
 
R

ReallyTired

Member
Oct 21, 2021
78
Maybe, if I was born in a different family, with a healthy brain.
Maybe then, I would've made better choices in life.
 
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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,558
I'd have to experience a lot of really horrible things all over again but it'd be worth it.
 
Snake of Eden

Snake of Eden

“Ye shall be as gods..🍎 🐍”
Jun 22, 2021
2,473
No. I wouldnt change a single thing. Everything that happened has happened for a reason and I just came to this realization recently. As painful as it was, still is and will be but I accept it now and I will try to endure it in the future as much as I can and all I am asking for in return is guidance and assistance for me to play my part as is expected of me to the end in this movie of life. Amen
 
J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
Yes I would avoid all the men I interacted with at all cost and stop being naive but I would still CTB due to ugliness
 
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lostautist

lostautist

wandering
Jan 12, 2022
225
Not if I had to relive my childhood which I had no control over. If I could go back to certain points and change decisions, maybe.
 
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UpandDownPrincess

UpandDownPrincess

Elementalist
Dec 31, 2019
833
But knowing how bad it was, you could just have done home schooling, online school, or went to a different school.

It was a long time ago. These options did not exist.

The internet was quite a few years away, home schooling was not permitted in my town and you went to the school you were geographically assigned. It was nothing like now.
 
S

summers

Visionary
Nov 4, 2020
2,493
It was a long time ago. These options did not exist.

The internet was quite a few years away, home schooling was not permitted in my town and you went to the school you were geographically assigned. It was nothing like now.
Same for me. When I was a kid, only options were public or parochial (Catholic) or private (super expensive) school. Not sure when home schooling became a thing.
 
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Silenos

Silenos

Ṿ̸̄Ọ̶͂Ỉ̶͉D̴̞͝ ̴̲̐A̷̾͜W̷̪͒Ā̵̯I̵͍̅T̵̛͔S̷̗͛
Jul 25, 2020
1,057
Hell no. I only needed this lifetime to learn that life isn't for me. There's no amount of money you could pay me to relive all this shit.
 
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Josuyo

Josuyo

No, I do not like life, take it away please
Oct 17, 2021
92
100%, I know I can't have changed anything about my abusive family but if I knew which people I met were bad egg's I'd never had invested time and effort into them
 
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willitpass

willitpass

Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
Mar 10, 2020
3,219
i don't think i would have been able to improve my circumstances. i would use the knowledge i have about ctb to make sure my first attempt at 13 was successful though
 
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NotSureToEndure

NotSureToEndure

Professor of not a lot
Aug 17, 2020
114
Yeah I'd head back to just after I left school. Skip uni (even though it was fun). Take out a loan, buy as much btc as I can. Go buy a place somewhere nice and chill 😎
 
TakeMeBack07

TakeMeBack07

Failure
Jan 16, 2022
128
na, of course not, because it really feels like i have no control on whether Im happy or not. my depression comes and goes. sick of dealing with the mess it and the mess it creates.
 
Rabhen

Rabhen

Isolated Loner
Dec 17, 2021
147
i think one of the biggest things making me want to ctb is the fact that my childhood and teen years are gone and can never come back and i wasted them all... if i could just go back and redo them, itd be kind of miserable but i think id be better off in the long run. idk i just think i missed out on everything to the point where watching shows aimed at preteens makes me cry.
Some of mine I wasted, but MOST of mine was stolen from me. I still would not go back and change a thing. I would still get abducted and raped at 4 1/2 then again at 6, I would still allow everyone to call me a liar and gaslight me about my physical conditions and what has happened to me, I would still allow all the beatings and emotional abuse. I would still try to kill myself several times and allow my own suicidal thoughts. Why? Because if I changed one tiny little thing I might not end up where I am right now, with the one person in the world that does not try to make me stop feeling depressed or suicidal and accepts me completely and unconditionally as I am. If I got rid of one miniscule hurt from my past, something might change and my life could be worse, I might not have found this site which has allowed me to accept my feelings of not wanting to be here in this life and I might actually not be here.
 
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Badluckhardtimes

Badluckhardtimes

Member
Dec 11, 2021
13
Yeah, and i say that with regret. Like most of us here, i was lied to my entire life, abused when not in conformity, and i started believing all the lies too. I went with it, thinking everybody else must be right, and i lied to myself up until my mid 30s too. And here's that old adage, "i have nobody to blame but myself". Yeah, i have no one to blame but myself until I want to ctb and I can't do that because I would actually enjoy that, so it's all fucking illegal and a big scandal, and all those boring losers all of a sudden come out of the woodwork telling you it's a mistake like anything you were going to do in this world was actually mattered. We live in a fucking cheap ass, disposable society. Here today, gone later today...you can't compete with this anymore unless you master accounting and quantum physics by the time you're 6 years old.

Anyway,

Philosophy has helped me overcome the bubble i was in for so long, but it was a hard road for me, and it appears to be another case of too little too late. I'm 39, jobless, no talent, and well, u all must know the rest of that spiel. It's cliche and it ain't too pretty.

Of fucking course I want to redo my life, i just can't. That's why I'm here, to find a solution. No I didn't make a billion dollars and I can't jump over the moon so being a guy in today's world makes me basically undateable to any woman i find even remotely attractive. What's with that anyway? These expectations are ludicrous today, and that's because we are living in a time where the elite need to control the human population. They do that through porn and feminism. Concurrently they make actual sex not happen in this world, and I'm ready to just throw in the towel, i give up. If I can't get a job, everybody thinks I'm an asshole, people don't even fucking want my help, nor do I even care anymore to exert myself upon these conniving, treacherous, chimpanzees i call my fellow man, and on top of all that, i cant even get laid, what the fuck is the point of this bullshit? At this point I'm beat and i just seem to be battling myself just to fucking care, which by default, I don't, and that's nothing new for me.

Would i redo it? Fuck yes. Can I redo it? Fuck no. My life's largely been a fucking waste, and if there is god in heaven, i just want to go up there, slap him in the face and demand my money back. I'm probably going to hell anyway, so might as well
 
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M

montana007

Member
Jun 8, 2020
59
Oh hell yeah (direct answer to the thread topic). Pretty much why I hope we get a second shot at it (although some around here would avoid that all costs from some fhe posts I've read and I've always been curious about that i.e. maybe it's because I cannot say the my life has been shit from day zero while other may not have been that lucky).

The condition is that you could come back and be inserted into a particular time and place and that you WOULD remember mistakes made and know who / what situations to avoid should they present themselves. To just come back and redo it all over again "blind": nah. I don't think so. Not for me.
 
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elfin

elfin

Member
Feb 8, 2022
80
yes. most of the reasons that i plan to ctb wouldn't be an issue if i had a time machine or the chance to start over.
 
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maakies

maakies

DOOK
Dec 7, 2021
132
I'm full the regret and loneliness everyday it fucking rips goddamn I do not know what ljfe is without it
 
S

sopwithcamel

Member
Mar 30, 2021
38
I can't redo my life and do things correctly with the parents and siblings I have and the environment I live in (no point in being an extremely knowledgeable child if you live in a shitty place with no opportunities). I'd rather win the lottery
 
Pain In The Ass

Pain In The Ass

Wizard
Feb 10, 2022
638
i think one of the biggest things making me want to ctb is the fact that my childhood and teen years are gone and can never come back and i wasted them all... if i could just go back and redo them, itd be kind of miserable but i think id be better off in the long run. idk i just think i missed out on everything to the point where watching shows aimed at preteens makes me cry.
Definitely, this is what haunts me. I'd be a better brother, less of a coward, life would be more meaningful because of how I view life now, and I'd take opportunities that were right in front of me that I wasted the first time around because life felt meaningless, because I got brainwashed by the nihilists around me - "So live as if you were living already for the second time and as if you had acted the first time as wrongly as you are about to act now!" - Victor Frankl
 
Darkover

Darkover

Archangel
Jul 29, 2021
5,575
no i wouldn't play this hand full stop in fact i wouldn't want to be anyone on this earth why cause it's just to shitty, there's a million and one things that i would like to be doing but this universe is too slow and shit for any of that, want to be a much better machine than any human
 
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jimmy7754

jimmy7754

I just want to be myself again
Dec 15, 2021
508
Part of me does.. part of me wishes I was dead and never experienced this life at all because it's impossible to go back in time and "apply" this idea.. I ended up this way because that's how it happen.. and I'm just done with it.
 
Chiisai

Chiisai

To infinity and beyond!
Sep 1, 2021
754
Oh that idea is fun and I strongly believe that theory that I so want to find out for myself.😁
 
Cherry Crumpet

Cherry Crumpet

Hiraeth
May 7, 2018
280
Yes. But I don't think my mother would listen to 12 year old me. If I could go back to even 18 though and tell her what will happen in 2017 to her and me maybe she would take me seriously and we wouldn't be in the situation we are now.

I'm still trying though. Haven't given up yet.
 
slushy

slushy

Member
Feb 19, 2022
89
I do have things I'd change about my life if I could do it again, but I don't think it would have changed my ultimate outcome
 
P

Preparingforpeace

Member
Jul 4, 2022
43
Abso-freaking-lutely. Given the chance, I would change quite a bit.
Some of the bad I'd leave, because good came from it.
But there's a lot that could use changing.
Wish I could go back, just a few years. That's all I would need.
 
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