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Bedrock48

Bedrock48

Dreadful damage, dreadful destiny
Feb 1, 2021
540
Isn't that what sleeping basically is?

Sleep is the closest thing irl. However, I wish I could experience actual death just for say a year. Everything from the dying process to any afterlife or the lack of one. Then pop back into existence as if it never happened, just retaining the memories. Feasibly impossible but it would be an amazing way to decide if its worth waiting for naturally or not.
 
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Largeletters

Largeletters

Alone
Jan 21, 2020
640
I fear that I never will, but if over one hundred people do it a day in the USA, then I can too, especially when I have good reasons to.
 
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Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc
listeningpost1379

listeningpost1379

enduring winter
Apr 20, 2019
93
Yeah even though my life is wholly gross and needed to end yesterday and there's no loved ones to hold me back, I want to live so much because I love myself and don't want to be rid of myself along with all my experiences with things I love. Developing self esteem was a mistake
 
1

112

Member
May 28, 2021
51
Nope. I've done things that could've killed me before, and here I am about to do it again. I haven't been deterred.
 
P

PDAnnie2610

Waiting for my bus.
Oct 27, 2019
701
I've had the SN, meto, atenolol, tramadol and even a little benzos to knock me out. I've had half of my finances settled, am on my way to settling the other half, prep some presents for some of my family, friends and loved ones and I should be good to go.

They ain't in my head, they don't know how much I hurt being me. They don't know how much I'll have loved to bring hope to kids so that they hopefully never have to suffer the way I did.

but it was not to be. And I've accepted that as such. I'm just trying to decide on the venue after prepping the presents..
 
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Reactions: EraseRewind and Largeletters
Someday_Somehow32

Someday_Somehow32

Member
Jul 20, 2022
90
Pretty much, I think this is why whenever I attempt I never get far
 
IDontLikeMyself

IDontLikeMyself

Member
Nov 8, 2022
30
Yeah all the time. I keep putting it off for the dumbest reasons. Like the weather is shit and I don´t feel like walking through the rain to do so, etc. So I guess it´s just me not having the balls to do so. But there will come a day. Hopefully that the stars align and I finally do commit to it.
 
Lost Magic

Lost Magic

Illuminated
May 5, 2020
3,206
Yeah, I wrote a post recently about my planned departure. https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/preparing-myself.103788/#post-1782974
 
R

Resinn66

Student
Sep 5, 2021
120
Overcoming the survival instinct is the hardest thing for me. I think that each of us has a point where the need for ctb is triggered. For me, for example, it's panic
 

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