Venting Does anybody else waste their entire day every day?

[Valky]

Me rn, help

 

[hopeless08]

I wake up, dreading the fact that it's yet another day I have to deal with. I just lay in my bed for hours. Rare is the day that I get out of bed within the first hour. No, I'm sitting there for 2-5 hours before I finally decide to get out. I drink some water but don't eat, I'd like to eat breakfast, but it is so rare that I ever feel hungry. I'll skip it and eat something later. It's mid-afternoon by this point. I've got the rest of the day to do... well to do what? I don't enjoy anything. I liked gaming when I was a teenager. I don't anymore. I don't have anything to do outside. There aren't any TV shows or movies I want to watch. YouTube videos are just, bland.

So I just sit in my chair in front of my computer, just idling on the desktop. Sometimes I pace around my apartment. Here and there maybe I'll play a game for an hour or two but I'm bored the whole time. It's evening now, I suppose I should eat something. I really don't feel like cooking, I'll just throw something in the microwave.

Dinner's done, I've got a few hours left before I should be in bed. I should do something so that I didn't spend the entire day doing literally nothing. But, nothing is enjoyable. I can't think of any way to pass the time. I just sit there. I pace around some more, thinking about life, or whatever else floats around in my mind.

Suddenly it's past midnight. I should probably go to bed. I lay in bed for hours, unable to fall asleep. Dreading the next day. Hating myself for wasting today. I hope tonight I can sleep for several hours, that will pass the time and would probably be healthy. Finally, I sleep for a couple of hours, before I wake up again. But I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to have to face yet another day, so I lay there for a few hours...

Every day is the same cycle, I waste away rarely doing anything. I do nothing but just sit there. I should be doing anything. I'm not talking about being productive, who cares about being productive I just want to do something I can enjoy to pass the time. Anhedonia is a real bitch, isn't it? There's more to life than just sitting there until the next day comes but it sure doesn't seem like it for me.

I can relate 100%. I literally don't do anything all day. Mornings are the worst
I don't enjoy doing anything. I try to put on a movie but my emotional pain won't let me concentrate. It's hell living like this.
The only thing that I look forward to is nighttime where I can escape reality.
I literally haven't left my house in months.
It's not a life it's pure hell… I just want to go, just cease to exist. I know how you feel.

Damn, could have written this myself. In a way it gives me a lot of solace to know I'm not the only one out there feeling this way. But it's sad anyone ever has to feel like this. I wish it wasn't like this for us.

Sleep is the only relief from my brain I get. Waking up has just become really triggering tbh. It's like, I have to survive yet another day. I can't carry on like this. I cry every day. I feel such loss and hopelessness. The only thing keeping me going is the possibility of securing SN to do that method. It's all I'm researching and thinking about all day. But it seems really fucking hard to get a reliable source anywhere. I'm tired.

Exactly my story. You just described my life. It's unbearable

 

[The Mute Viking]

I believe that many of us on this site share a similar feeling/experience.
This world is incredibly cruel.
It's like being repeatively cut open with a dull butter knife.

One day, for each of us. The pain will be over.

I hope we all find each other in that peaceful dark.

 

[RemainingDubious]

I'm confident that the majority of people who apply for a job don't do so because of productivity but rather because they want to survive. However, if they were to admit that, society would fall apart so they need a comfortable excuse to justify their lives. The same thing applies to the idea of "giving back to society"

The more you think about things the more absurd society is. It isn't social at all. It's a dog eat dog world. It's no surprise there's so much bullshit in the world when the majority of people are unable to even be completely honest with themselves. How can we expect them to be honest with others when they're incapable of being honest with themselves?

Why should people waste their finite time attempting to give back to society, when society is the biggest problem?

Those unwilling to play pretend are often looked down upon and isolated from the "good" sheep. Those in positions of power often put those who refuse to conform in mental institutions or label them with mental health conditions to assassinate their character.

The reality is it's "normal" people who should be in mental institutions for being so deluded. They're the ones out of touch with reality. They're the ones who believe they're special, they believe their thoughts are superior, they believe they're actions are special and their existence has a positive purpose.

Their mentality is completely irrational, they're completely delusional. If anyone is insane it's them.

 

[R_N]

The more you think about things the more absurd society is. It isn't social at all. It's a dog eat dog world. It's no surprise there's so much bullshit in the world when the majority of people are unable to even be completely honest with themselves. How can we expect them to be honest with others when they're incapable of being honest with themselves?

Why should people waste their finite time attempting to give back to society, when society is the biggest problem?

Those unwilling to play pretend are often looked down upon and isolated from the "good" sheep. Those in positions of power often put those who refuse to conform in mental institutions or label them with mental health conditions to assassinate their character.

The reality is it's "normal" people who should be in mental institutions for being so deluded. They're the ones out of touch with reality. They're the ones who believe they're special, they believe their thoughts are superior, they believe they're actions are special and their existence has a positive purpose.

Their mentality is completely irrational, they're completely delusional. If anyone is insane it's them.

I don't wish for anyone to be locked in wards but I agree with the rest of what you said more or less. I also noticed that whenever someone who doesn't conform starts being influential, they are soon slandered, demonized, banned everywhere and even put in jails without any solid proof of their wrongdoings.

And masses eat everything popular media outlets say without shred of a doubt.

 

[woh6]

Me too. Even though I could do anything, I see no point and I don't have the will for it.

 

[dragonofenvy]

Why should people waste their finite time attempting to give back to society, when society is the biggest problem?

Those unwilling to play pretend are often looked down upon and isolated from the "good" sheep.

For me, it's a give-and-take thing. I feel as though I've given everything that I was supposed to give, but have gotten little in return. I've already ranted about this before. Basically, I just feel like if I'm going to put so much in I'd at the very least like to feel decent, or have some amount of financial security, not just... this.

 

[Doemu]

My days? No. I alredy wasted my whole life. And knowing it. I knew that never could care about wasting everything cause i ever hated my life. I ever knew that i was going to end in suicide, so i just lived according to it.

 

[Ironborn]

Spent almost twenty years slaving away at work; retail, warehouse, truck driving.
I'm wrecked physically, mentally burnt out and now I'm out of work because I just can't be bothered.
I mean what's the point?
Slavery was never abolished they just made the shackles harder to notice.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Everyday I don't spend planning my CTB is a waste of a day.

 

[Shar]

I spend the day sleeping and when I wake up I'm browsing the web, commenting shit and constantly refreshing the same page waiting for some good news, although nothing interesting usually comes. Sometimes I play offline games like ff7remake and persona3, but it's hard to stay focused, it seems like games don't please me like they used to.

Some days a week I have to work at a car wash, which I hate, because it's a tiring job that takes up my whole day and pays me a misery that's almost worth nothing.

I also go to a therapist once a week, we talk about nothing relevant, because I don't open up to her since she will never understand me anyway. So I just sit there and ask her to give me a board game to pass the time, because I have nothing to talk about and staying silent just staring at each other would be embarrassing. I hate going there, I only go because of family pressure

 

[Anhedonico]

I don't know whether reading this forum and people feeling like me can be considered a "waste" of time. If yes, that's what I've been doing today for hours, but that's kind of relaxing for me how identified I feel with many people here.

 

[notforl0ng]

I've been room bound for 9 months now. I've done longer stretches before. You described my life in a nutshell. Next month I'm CTBing so it's nice to know that any responsibilities I neglect right now and come back to bite me will just help me beat the SI. My job is currently starting the process of firing me, thank fuck. I have no further way to pay rent past March. I got my tracking number for SN and it should be leaving Ukraine soon. I feel nothing but relief. People are wondering why I'm suddenly happy lol. Until that point, I'm going to finish a few games on my bucket list, binge watch movies and TV shows I love and haven't seen yet, and wait. If SN fails then there's always breaking my sobriety and hopping off a bridge.

 

[R_N]

I spend the day sleeping and when I wake up I'm browsing the web, commenting shit and constantly refreshing the same page waiting for some good news, although nothing interesting usually comes. Sometimes I play offline games like ff7remake and persona3, but it's hard to stay focused, it seems like games don't please me like they used to.

Some days a week I have to work at a car wash, which I hate, because it's a tiring job that takes up my whole day and pays me a misery that's almost worth nothing.

I also go to a therapist once a week, we talk about nothing relevant, because I don't open up to her since she will never understand me anyway. So I just sit there and ask her to give me a board game to pass the time, because I have nothing to talk about and staying silent just looking at each other would be embarrassing. I hate going there, I only go because of family pressure

Persona 3 was great. I think it is a good remake as someone who played fes long time ago.

Ff7 remake was also good compared to original.

 

[notforl0ng]

Persona 3 was great. I think it is a good remake as someone who played fes long time ago.

Ff7 remake was also good compared to original.

I saw that Persona 3's remake got uploaded to xbox game pass but I know those games are extremely long and I'm currently playing Elden Ring for the first time lol. I don't know if I have enough time to finish these before my time is up, which sucks. I won't see GTA 6 either, that's my biggest regret choosing this year to CTB. Isn't that sad?

 

[R_N]

I saw that Persona 3's remake got uploaded to xbox game pass but I know those games are extremely long and I'm currently playing Elden Ring for the first time lol. I don't know if I have enough time to finish these before my time is up, which sucks. I won't see GTA 6 either, that's my biggest regret choosing this year to CTB. Isn't that sad?

If you play normally yeah, persona games are longer than average jrpgs.

I wish I could play ER for the first time it is too good, fs games are among my favorites. I played all of them.

And, about gta 6 you never know...

 

[sserafim]

If you play normally yeah, persona games are longer than average jrpgs.

I wish I could play ER for the first time it is too good, fs games are among my favorites. I played all of them.

And, about gta 6 you never know...

My favorite video game is Pokémon Mystery Dungeon, my favorite is Explorers of Sky. I also like Explorers of Time, Explorers of Darkness, Pokémon Diamond, Pearl and Platinum. I used to play Pokémon on my DS Lite before my mom took it away…

 

[R_N]

My favorite video game is Pokémon Mystery Dungeon, my favorite is Explorers of Sky. I also like Explorers of Time, Explorers of Darkness, Pokémon Diamond, Pearl and Platinum. I used to play Pokémon on my DS Lite before my mom took it away…

I tried some of the pokemon games on 2ds xl years ago but never got into them.

Do you know about emulators btw? There is one called drastic that allows you to play ds games on your phone. I am not sure how this forum treats piracy tho...

 

[Malaria]

The combination of executive dysfunction and severe agoraphobia has made it impossible to do anything. I just lie around on the internet surrounded by these four walls and it's been that way since leaving school well over a decade ago. I don't even really have a routine. I just sleep and if I'm not sleeping, I'm rotting. Living like groundhog day everyday. Repeating days. It's so easy to lose track of time and when you're not doing anything, is there really such a point in time keeping?

It helps a little bit to clean around the house and open a window every now and then for a taste of fresh air, otherwise, it is the same day on loop.

Oh man, executive dysfunctions... as a neurodivergent person myself, I know that all too well. It's truly awful, and it's even worse when the people around you don't understand and think you're being "lazy" when you're not.

 

[Shar]

Persona 3 was great. I think it is a good remake as someone who played fes long time ago.

Ff7 remake was also good compared to original.

I agree, it's a good game. Its better than the p5, which I couldn't even get halfway. Although they are extremely similar games, something about the fifth title quickly put me off.

FF7R is the first contact I have with the franchise, the story is a bit confusing for me and the combat system could be much better. Overall, it's been a decent experience. I would understand the story better if it were translated into my language, I don't speak native English and some characters speaks with way too much slang, especially Barret.

I saw that Persona 3's remake got uploaded to xbox game pass but I know those games are extremely long and I'm currently playing Elden Ring for the first time lol. I don't know if I have enough time to finish these before my time is up, which sucks. I won't see GTA 6 either, that's my biggest regret choosing this year to CTB. Isn't that sad?

I'm playing P3 on GamePass and FF7 on Steam. If you have GamePass it's worth testing, but as you said its LONG and has a lot of talk, sometimes unnecessary.

GTA 6 is the main reason why I don't CTB and thats sad. It's so irrational and pathetic to procrastinate the end of my suffering because of a game..or because of anything else.
Im so hyped, even though I know I'm going to be disappointed, I never learn lol

 

[R_N]

I agree, it's a good game. Its better than the p5, which I couldn't even get halfway. Although they are extremely similar games, something about the fifth title quickly put me off.

FF7R is the first contact I have with the franchise, the story is a bit confusing for me and the combat system could be much better. Overall, it's been a decent experience. I would understand the story better if it were translated into my language, I don't speak native English and some characters speaks with way too much slang, especially Barret.


I'm playing P3 on GamePass and FF7 on Steam. If you have GamePass it's worth testing, but as you said its LONG and has a lot of talk, sometimes unnecessary.

GTA 6 is the main reason why I don't CTB and thats sad. It's so irrational and pathetic to procrastinate the end of my suffering because of a game..or because of anything else.
Im so hyped, even though I know I'm going to be disappointed, I never learn lol

I liked p5 but it felt like the main premise was took from p4. Shadow self, other self styled dungeons etc.

There is also smt btw, similar style to persona but more challenging games with more choices. In smt iv apocalypse you can even kill your own party near the end for example. Smt has more darker tone than persona and lets you make important decisions.


Regarding english, obviously it is not my first language either lol. I do feel like I am able to understand what is said more than type/speak well tho.

 

[Cuppatea856]

"…Like a cat
Tied to a stick
That's driven into
Frozen winter shit (the ability to laugh at weakness)
Calm
Fitter, healthier and more productive
A pig
In a cage
On antibiotics."

 

[sserafim]

I tried some of the pokemon games on 2ds xl years ago but never got into them.

Do you know about emulators btw? There is one called drastic that allows you to play ds games on your phone. I am not sure how this forum treats piracy tho...

Yeah I know about them, I heard they weren't safe to use though and that you had to like jailbreak your devices or something…thanks for lmk! I'll look into it

 

[R_N]

Yeah I know about them, I heard they weren't safe to use though and that you had to like jailbreak your devices or something…thanks for lmk! I'll look into it

Nah no need for rooting your phone, just allow download when it asks for permission. You can find drastic and any game rom easily online, enjoy.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

My favorite video game is Pokémon Mystery Dungeon, my favorite is Explorers of Sky. I also like Explorers of Time, Explorers of Darkness, Pokémon Diamond, Pearl and Platinum. I used to play Pokémon on my DS Lite before my mom took it away…

Based and Poképilled

 

[RemainingDubious]

I spend the day sleeping and when I wake up I'm browsing the web, commenting shit and constantly refreshing the same page waiting for some good news, although nothing interesting usually comes. Sometimes I play offline games like ff7remake and persona3, but it's hard to stay focused, it seems like games don't please me like they used to.

Some days a week I have to work at a car wash, which I hate, because it's a tiring job that takes up my whole day and pays me a misery that's almost worth nothing.

I also go to a therapist once a week, we talk about nothing relevant, because I don't open up to her since she will never understand me anyway. So I just sit there and ask her to give me a board game to pass the time, because I have nothing to talk about and staying silent just staring at each other would be embarrassing. I hate going there, I only go because of family pressure

Hopefully FFVII Rebirth will bring some much needed comfort, although knowing Square Enix i'm personally sceptical.

 

[notforl0ng]

I agree, it's a good game. Its better than the p5, which I couldn't even get halfway. Although they are extremely similar games, something about the fifth title quickly put me off.

FF7R is the first contact I have with the franchise, the story is a bit confusing for me and the combat system could be much better. Overall, it's been a decent experience. I would understand the story better if it were translated into my language, I don't speak native English and some characters speaks with way too much slang, especially Barret.


I'm playing P3 on GamePass and FF7 on Steam. If you have GamePass it's worth testing, but as you said its LONG and has a lot of talk, sometimes unnecessary.

GTA 6 is the main reason why I don't CTB and thats sad. It's so irrational and pathetic to procrastinate the end of my suffering because of a game..or because of anything else.
Im so hyped, even though I know I'm going to be disappointed, I never learn lol

If you survive to GTA 6 make sure to pour one out for those who didn't live to see it

I just finished Yakuza 7 after 60 hours of long dialogue and grinding so I'm probably JRPG'd out for a bit haha. Elden Ring and and finishing Baldur's Gate 3 will have to do for me I think

 

[RemainingDubious]

I saw that Persona 3's remake got uploaded to xbox game pass but I know those games are extremely long and I'm currently playing Elden Ring for the first time lol. I don't know if I have enough time to finish these before my time is up, which sucks. I won't see GTA 6 either, that's my biggest regret choosing this year to CTB. Isn't that sad?

Elden Ring passed many hours for me, there's a guy on YouTube called FightinCowboy i highly recommend following his walkthrough if you want to get all trophies. Just beware there was afew mistakes he made and other stuff were patched. If you read his pinned comments on each part and hold off killing npc's you shouldn't go wrong.

 

[ihatemylifee]

Yes all I do is sleep eat watch a show repeat

 

[RemainingDubious]

My favorite video game is Pokémon Mystery Dungeon, my favorite is Explorers of Sky. I also like Explorers of Time, Explorers of Darkness, Pokémon Diamond, Pearl and Platinum. I used to play Pokémon on my DS Lite before my mom took it away…

i'm really showing my age here When Pokémon Mystery Dungeon first came out on the GBA and DS i went through a phase for quite some time where i actually needed to play them in order to get to sleep. It's probably why i often only manage to get sleep when laid in bed playing on the switch in handheld mode.