I watched 'Schindler's List' last night. I've been putting it off for years because it's obvious it was going to be horrific in places. I always felt like it was something that needed to be watched though. To acknowledge just how awful of a species we can be. It was still unbelievably horrible to imagine the reality of it.
There are other films I only put on or watch when I'm in the specific frame of mind to be able to handle them. 'Requiem for a Dream' is one. I haven't rewatched 'The Whale' since the first time. Also, the HBO series of 'Chernobyl' is disturbing I find.
Sometimes I go looking for disturbing things though. Not really gore. Although, maybe it's the same drive- to make us feel something extreme. I'm not sure why. Whether I want it to change me in some profound way.
When I was younger, I suppose I hoped I'd stumble on a philosophy that made sense of the world. Now, it's maybe more about emotions. I think there can be media pieces that partly change our lives or perspectives at least.
I remember once I read a post by someone who said that a song had ruined their life! That their partner- on hearing the song 'Firestarter' by 'The Prodigy' had totally changed in character in to someone aggressive and violent.
I don't tend to believe a media piece can change us but I wonder if it unlocks things within us sometimes.
Imagine creating something that powerful. I suppose that in itself could create a reason for living. I've just never had a good enough idea for something. It would be awful to unlock something negative though. Like opening the lid on Pandora's box.
But, I suppose those are the questions in this post. Do you look for potentially life or emotion changing media/ experiences? Have you ever had the desire to create something that profound yourself?
I think that's maybe what I'm doing though- when I bed rot and spend hours doom scrolling or just consuming/ interacting with content. I suppose I'm hoping something will make my brain 'click' into what I know we should be doing instead. But then, I'm not really watching motivational material to do that.
But then I wonder if all of this is just preparing myself mentally for death too. Seeing as I feel stuck here while I wait for my Dad to go first, I wonder if the last few years in particular have been a mental preparation in saying goodbye to life. Especially by constantly reminding myself about the awful aspects of human nature. The state of the world. I think even objectively speaking, there's plenty of source material to feel depressed by. What are your experiences?
There are other films I only put on or watch when I'm in the specific frame of mind to be able to handle them. 'Requiem for a Dream' is one. I haven't rewatched 'The Whale' since the first time. Also, the HBO series of 'Chernobyl' is disturbing I find.
Sometimes I go looking for disturbing things though. Not really gore. Although, maybe it's the same drive- to make us feel something extreme. I'm not sure why. Whether I want it to change me in some profound way.
When I was younger, I suppose I hoped I'd stumble on a philosophy that made sense of the world. Now, it's maybe more about emotions. I think there can be media pieces that partly change our lives or perspectives at least.
I remember once I read a post by someone who said that a song had ruined their life! That their partner- on hearing the song 'Firestarter' by 'The Prodigy' had totally changed in character in to someone aggressive and violent.
I don't tend to believe a media piece can change us but I wonder if it unlocks things within us sometimes.
Imagine creating something that powerful. I suppose that in itself could create a reason for living. I've just never had a good enough idea for something. It would be awful to unlock something negative though. Like opening the lid on Pandora's box.
But, I suppose those are the questions in this post. Do you look for potentially life or emotion changing media/ experiences? Have you ever had the desire to create something that profound yourself?
I think that's maybe what I'm doing though- when I bed rot and spend hours doom scrolling or just consuming/ interacting with content. I suppose I'm hoping something will make my brain 'click' into what I know we should be doing instead. But then, I'm not really watching motivational material to do that.
But then I wonder if all of this is just preparing myself mentally for death too. Seeing as I feel stuck here while I wait for my Dad to go first, I wonder if the last few years in particular have been a mental preparation in saying goodbye to life. Especially by constantly reminding myself about the awful aspects of human nature. The state of the world. I think even objectively speaking, there's plenty of source material to feel depressed by. What are your experiences?
