Discussion Do you think you are a good judge of character?

[Forever Sleep]

I think I'm very poor at judging a person's character- especially after initially meeting them. I have made 'mistakes' both ways- thinking people are really nice and they end up being utterly ruthless. Also- thinking people are scary and mean and they end up being really kind.

I think I'm probably rubbish at it because I don't socialise much. How about you?

 

[jodes2]

Yeah I'm awful at that. Been scammed enough times. I'm not very smart really. Autism and social anxiety don't help. Or ADHD for that matter. I'm pretty clueless. It took me 8 years to learn my neighbour is an absolute arsehole. I'm still trying to decide about other people. I realised too late that Boris Johnson is a bloody arsehole too. Usually I'm scared of someone to start with but assume the best of them. Pretty naive and dangerous, you'd have thought my fear could protect me and guide me but it doesn't

 

[Jarni]

I'm not perfect at this, but after lots of experiences I can at least say from 1-3 messages/ communications (1 is normally more than enough) if a person is toxic/abuser/narcissistic pervert with 500% guarantee. At least there is no way for me to have this type of persons in my surroundings.

 

[lionetta12]

I think I'm very poor at judging a person's character- especially after initially meeting them. I have made 'mistakes' both ways- thinking people are really nice and they end up being utterly ruthless. Also- thinking people are scary and mean and they end up being really kind.

I think I'm probably rubbish at it because I don't socialise much. How about you?

I'm pretty spot on, but I have issues putting down boundaries and saying no when people cross them or when they abuse me.

 

[Silent.Tears]

Oh, not at all.

 

[whittleDaWood]

An excellent "litmus test" to judge another person's character is the following: How do you feel after interacting with them? Do you feel better, the same, or worse? It's that simple. If you feel better, they're nice and fun, in general. If you feel the same, they're just normal people. If you feel worse, they're toxic. Keep in mind a singular interaction is not a perfect indication, but after a few interactions, you'll notice a pattern, and this should be the basis for your character judgement. GLTA!

 

[Jarni]

An excellent "litmus test" to judge another person's character is the following: How do you feel after interacting with them? Do you feel better, the same, or worse? It's that simple. If you feel better, they're nice and fun, in general. If you feel the same, they're just normal people. If you feel worse, they're toxic. Keep in mind a singular interaction is not a perfect indication, but after a few interactions, you'll notice a pattern, and this should be the basis for your character judgement. GLTA!

Abusers can be pleasant in the first months and even years... :-(

 

[whittleDaWood]

Abusers can be pleasant in the first months and even years... :-(

Excellent point; this is unfortunately very true. I have had the displeasure of experiencing these types of relationships and friendships in my own life. The following book provided me with the knowledge to detect and prevent, as well as, heal from these types of situations.

Psychopath Free (Expanded Edition): Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People

I highly recommend this book to educate yourself on the mannerisms and red flags that these types of toxic and manipulative people exhibit.

 

[Jarni]

Excellent point; this is unfortunately very true. I have had the displeasure of experiencing these types of relationships and friendships in my own life. The following book provided me with the knowledge to detect and prevent, as well as, heal from these types of situations.

Psychopath Free (Expanded Edition): Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People

I highly recommend this book to educate yourself on the mannerisms and red flags that these types of toxic and manipulative people exhibit.

Yes it is a good advice, everybody needs to learn by heart this type of books and, the most important, act accordingly ASAP (cut off all interactions forever with 0 hesitation).
And don't say to yourself "maybe I'm wrong, I'll verify some more times to be sure"...

Unfortunately there are many toxic people in this World. When you think that you already met all of them, you can be sure that you are totally wrong

 

[lofticries]

Lol I'm too good at reading ppl. It honestly ruined my life.

 

[Source Energy]

Yes. I am an excellent judge of character. I can tell right away who is a kind person, who is a bitch/jerk, and who is so-so. I have never been wrong. I have the nose of a cat. Also, because of my soft personality, only pure hearted people get close to me. One, because I sniff them out on first sight, second because the mean ones want to bully me. I got so good at reading people that I can even tell from a picture, or before they even say a word, just by seeing their mugs.

Lol I'm too good at reading ppl. It honestly ruined my life.

on the contrary, it is a gift, be grateful. Imagine spilling all your secrets or lending money to an untrustworthy person. Thinking that someone is nice when they aren't. Or alienating your next potential best friend. Reading people is a great skill to have.