Discussion Do you think we need contrast to appreciate/ enjoy life?

[Forever Sleep]

I kind of know I'd be happier now if my circumstances were like they have been in the past. If I had to go in somewhere to work. If I was contracted in a permanent job, I'd be so grateful right now. To have the weekend free and alone to relax and recharge. But then overall- I'm sure I'd be miserable- I was during that time. Overall, I know I'm so much better off now but, I can't quite bring myself to be grateful for it.

Similarly, I don't truly appreciate my (reasonable) health unless I've just recovered from something horrible!

Can we be happy if we aren't grateful? And, can we be grateful unless we know what it's like to not have the thing we should feel grateful for? Health, leisure time, comfort, entertainment etc? Do we need to go without, in order to really appreciate something?

Do we feel achievement even, without struggle? Would someone who has been transported to the top of Everest feel the same high as someone who climbed it? It would still be the same incredible view but, are we wired to think we need to suffer in order to achieve?

But then, that means we need bad or at least, unpleasant/ less optimal things in life to appreciate the times that are better. Which in itself isn't really a nice thought. I guess most people just accept it as the status quo but, it just looks slightly sadistic to me.

But then, that makes me wonder about heaven- if there even is such a place. Do humans belong in heaven? Would we feel satisfied with an entirely fair world? Where there is no need for struggle so presumably, no extra reward if we do? What could make a human entirely happy? Just the right amount of challenge, variety, comfort etc. How could there be a world that suited everyone's disparate needs?

 

[cakedog]

I guess it depends
my conditions aren't exactly awful/unlivable in the sense that i know there's a lot of people that have it worse but even if i were exposed to them or forced to live on their shoes for some time and brought back to my current life i would still hate it and would probably still kms

but when it comes to achievements i really appreciate the process and like you said i would rather experience the whole hiking process than be immediately teleported to the top
i think if i had everything i want already at hand i would probably get bored and become tired of living very quickly
doing all these steps keeps me busy even if i know it's all meaningless at the end of the day

i'd rather just be a machine that has to realize all these steps and complicated processes than a god that can have everything he wants just by thinking about it
So i guess it really depends what contrast are you trying to show to someone. i don't think that immediately showing someone worse conditions = having a better outlook on life
but i guess looking at the bigger picture just like a god becomes bored a machine will eventually run out of coal and we would just be exactly like him so i guess enjoying the process and not only the final result is just a way to trick ourselves to have longer lifespans which isn't exactly a bad thing but idk it may be different for everyone
sorry if this sounds like schizo babble btw just tried to write my thoughts in the most coherent way possible (probably failed)

 

[Forever Sleep]

but i guess looking at the bigger picture just like a god becomes bored

That's an interesting idea. That a God could become bored because presumably- nothing is challenging. But then, Gods are also seen as perfect beings. Being bored doesn't seem like an appropriate response for a perfect being.

I also agree that- simply being shown a more difficult life isn't always enough. I think we have to live both experiences. But then, we may not necessarily feel happier after a bad patch too. Simply for having gone through it- the trauma left behind. Plus, fear it may happen again. I guess contentment doesn't always follow a bad patch.

 

[NoHorizon]

I do think gratitude is a skill that has to be developed and will vastly improve quality of life. I work in an industry where I have to deal with rich people and so many of them are completely miserable despite having the resources to essentially do and have whatever they want at any time.

I also think, like your Everest example, almost anything that makes us feel achievement and satisfaction has an inherent level of struggle. Overcoming an obstacle appears to largely be the thing that we attach the feeling of worth to.