Fuck yes I hate myself! I've wasted my entire fuckin life. Now I'm old, used up,broke and fuckin miserable. I have nobody who gives a fuck about me and I have nothing to give a fuck about.
I do
Every time I have a chance to better my life I'll self sabotage and make it worse. I'm the main reason I feel this way about myself and life in general
Internal factor: I hate myself because i can't beat my procasination, i also can't focus for a long time which makes studying harder despite everyone else had an easy time when they learn something.
External factor: i know this's one of the factor everyone can't control but i hate myself because im not an fast learner, a genius who don't have to rely on someone else instead i have to rely on someone to help me solve my problem despite me trying my hardest to not beg for help
I definitely hate myself. Why? Because I'm a POS. I can't do anything right. I've wasted my life on trying to be happy, trying to be nice, trying to do the right things. I'm nothing but a loser and a waste of space.
Well I don't... I want to ctb but sometimes it makes me feel like a monster because she really did nothing wrong, it's just the people. I really hope she will find peace soon. I just want to protect her from this world.
I hate what I've done to my life and how I successively fucked up every opportunity I ever got, how big of a disappointment I am not only to my family but to myself. I hate the thought of how much potential I had yet I wasted it all. There is no single reason for me not to hate myself as I am the one who is my main problem.
1. my life didn't turn out how I thought it was going to
2. I do not contribute anything to society and I don't fit anywhere
3. I do not have any friends in my real life or online or any kind of support system and never had any at all during the course of my life when I think about it
because I just observe everything and was never good at adapting but when trying to adapt the only things I learned were that I am easily replaceable and abnormal and that I should stop attempting to fit anywhere and that being vulnerable or open with people is not a good thing to do
but those experiences and not wanting to try anymore makes me appreciate small talk more and simple gestures from strangers like "thank you" and "have a nice day" or "how are you" not because they genuinely want to know how you are but just because it's the polite thing to do and then I can have a moment to imagine what it would be like to fit because those gesture and phrases feel very scripted to me and all I have to say is something along the lines of "okay" or "good" or "you too" and add facial expressions with it
Hate is a strong word. I feel that I've caused a lot of harm to many people. It was never intentional, but that doesn't mean that it didn't happen. For this, I feel a deep, deep sense of regret, but I do not hate myself. Simply put, I don't care enough to hate.
Before God yes, after God, no. It's hard to explain but something changed after receiving the Holy Spirit. I have a better capacity to love myself and other people now, I'm more patient, accepting, forgiving of other people. I wish I could help other people at least get to this place too. It does not mean all your problems are solved and life is now rainbows and unicorns. U just get more internal peace and less fear of living.
I hate myself.
It's impossible to explain exactly why, but I find that people are generally admirable in their own ways. I have never found someone less admirable than myself.
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