Discussion DBT theripy

[kkiwii]

this is a bit of a vent but i also want to discuss with other people about their experiences

so i have BPD and started DBT about two years ago but didnt want to do it so i didnt pay much attention and did NOT apply it to my life. after a few more attempts on my life abt 8 months ago i decided to reattend and actually use my dbt skills but every part of me does not want to get better. in fact i want to get as bad as possible and just die, well long story short i jumped off a bridge into the mississippi river and almost drowned and landed in the mental hospital again. this time it was different because my old friend from school was there and we helped eachother get through our stays. i dont think i could have possibly got ""better"" without her. in the hospital i reapplied those skills and ive been out for a month and still kept it up. i think my mind is like rewired a little with thinking dialecticaly and its improved my life so much. i still want to get worse and i really want to die, but with my skills its givvin me hope. my life is a shit show and ive refused to hope for anything for years because every time i get my hopes up i get let down, but im very slowly getting past that. its a very slow, tough, painful process but im doing it. how has DBT effected anyone elses life and if your in DBT have you actually applied thinking dialecticaly to your life ? its a total change of mindset and its scary but worth it !!

 

[sleepingowl55]

i've started the DBT treatment about 6 months ago. in the beginning i was really hopeful. my first round of the group skills training was good i was pushing myself. but my psychiatrist switched my antidepressant and i've spiraled down a depression hole that i don't seem to be able to get out of. now i have a concrete suicide plan. i have BPD, a mix of eating disorders, OCD… sometimes throughout the day i still feel a bit of hope, though. but i relate so much to you about wanting to get worse. a part of me wants people to know how much i suffer. anyways, sorry for rambling. it is awesome that you're putting the work, and DBT is a great evidence based therapy. i hope all goes well :)