ctb in the forest is making me nervous

[cakedog]

I genuinely don't know how people can just go alone and ctb there specially at night
it isn't my ideal location but it's the only available one
i just get creeped out by the idea of getting attacked by animals or by shady people which is ironic since i'm about to kill myself but i just don't know i just get these thoughts when i'm doing nothing on my bed but during the day which is where the bad things happen i just don't care and just want to go through with it
I'll leave my belongings to my brother so i don't really care about what happens to me after i drop them at his grandparents house but sadly i'll still be alive really wish my sentience/consciousness ended there too

i guess maybe i just want to continue to be in this state during my death my current place isn't my ideal but it's semi-ideal but after months of thinking i just can't visualize any other method and location and my intrusive thoughts heavily prevent from researching more and i know they will bring me back to ctb in the forest anyways since that seems to be my only way out
will also have to wait a few hours for evening since there are some rural workers and being lobotomized is one of my biggest fears so i don't want anyone to find me hanging and try to ""save"" me also think i'll just get random anxiety attacks or hallucinations since that place just feels very alienated and
i've never really liked rural areas to begin with but i specially dislike the ones here, they just make me feel nauseous and uncomfortable

anyways sorry for the long boring post just wanted to vent a little

 

[Exhausted546]

I genuinely don't know how people can just go alone and ctb there specially at night
it isn't my ideal location but it's the only available one
i just get creeped out by the idea of getting attacked by animals or by shady people which is ironic since i'm about to kill myself but i just don't know i just get these thoughts when i'm doing nothing on my bed but during the day which is where the bad things happen i just don't care and just want to go through with it
I'll leave my belongings to my brother so i don't really care about what happens to me after i drop them at his grandparents house but sadly i'll still be alive really wish my sentience/consciousness ended there too

i guess maybe i just want to continue to be in this state during my death my current place isn't my ideal but it's semi-ideal but after months of thinking i just can't visualize any other method and location and my intrusive thoughts heavily prevent from researching more and i know they will bring me back to ctb in the forest anyways since that seems to be my only way out
will also have to wait a few hours for evening since there are some rural workers and being lobotomized is one of my biggest fears so i don't want anyone to find me hanging and try to ""save"" me also think i'll just get random anxiety attacks or hallucinations since that place just feels very alienated and
i've never really liked rural areas to begin with but i specially dislike the ones here, they just make me feel nauseous and uncomfortable

anyways sorry for the long boring post just wanted to vent a little

Where else would you prefer to do it? I'll do it in the woods, it's not a forest but there's a lot of trees. I've been procrastinating these past 3 nights. I might end up doing it tonight,maybe not but I feel like it's quite private. It was better than all the other alternatives imo.

How far is the forest from your place?

 

[Crematoryy]

I believe forests are a very esoteric environment, and I would like to die in a place that conveys peace. Have you considered other alternatives ? I also have the vision of walking alone in the woods while I'm there to die. I just wouldn't want to do it at home. How about traveling to the beach and drowning in the sea?

 

[cakedog]

Where else would you prefer to do it? I'll do it in the woods, it's not a forest but there's a lot of trees. I've been procrastinating these past 3 nights. I might end up doing it tonight,maybe not but I feel like it's quite private. It was better than all the other alternatives imo.

How far is the forest from your place?

Ideally i would like to do it in my room but it's not going to be possible so i'll just have to do it in the woods
the forest is just a 10 minute drive from where i am so it's reachable

I believe forests are a very esoteric environment, and I would like to die in a place that conveys peace. Have you considered other alternatives ? I also have the vision of walking alone in the woods while I'm there to die. I just wouldn't want to do it at home. How about traveling to the beach and drowning in the sea?

i don't live near the beach and drowning looks like an awful way to go i have considered abandoned buildings since i would like to do it in an urban area but there aren't any where i live

thanks for your posts btw guys
i feel much calmer now it's comforting to know at least i'm not alone

 

[kuroshimi]

I am actually thinking about this and since I love to be alone with nature, it would be really sweet to ctb in forest. Although it probably be more comfortable to do in my parents' house, where I grew up.

 

[Shadows From Hell]

In the forest is where I'm planning to go. In about 3 weeks I'm leaving home to go do a couple week bike ride on a trail, which is pretty secluded at night, unless other hikers or bikers join you for the night. The biking trail is more woods than forest, and there's a river running beside it for the entire length(184 miles).

After that, I'm hiking onto a different trail, which leads into the forest. From there you see less people, some days you see no one.

I hiked that trail some years ago for about 400 miles and had no issues with people or wild animals. The 7 or 8 black bears I saw, they saw me but posed no risk.

I want to go somewhere secluded and peaceful, which is why I'm choosing the forest as my final place.

 

[Nikkra]

I thought i would like to do it in the forest but i realised i'd have to do it at night, not because i wouldn't be able to find a secluded place where i could do the act without being caught (even in the uk) but because i would want to leave a note that would be seen quickly on a semi busy trail so that police could be notified quickly to find my body, and that would mean putting the note up at night so that it would be seen in the morning, giving me some time during the night to drink the SN. But i decided against it for a few reasons: I wouldn't want to ctb in the forest at night, there is a small chance a night walker could see the note prematurely which would make me anxious, there is a small chance the note wouldn't be seen and body not found quickly which would make me anxious, a member of public may find my body before the police and it traumatises them, I don't like the idea of ruining that forest for any regular walkers there.

A hotel seems like the most reliable and trauma reducing option to me the more i think about it. It ensures my body is found quickly, police are the first to see my body, and family are quickly notified. The main upsides i've found to the forest option though is that less onlookers will see your bodybag when police take you away as opposed to a hotel, and if you vomit or make a small mess it's not going to require a clean up job for someone.

 

[NotSoEnchanted]

Take it from someone who has hiked hundreds of miles in the woods at night alone, the woods truly aren't that scary nor dangerous. A lot of fear comes from media like horror movies and such, painting the woods in a negative and scary light, but in reality they're relatively safe and peaceful. Much safer than the city IMO. I get the fear though, I do! As before I forced myself to overcome it, I was also scared of the woods, especially at night. Now however, I find great comfort in the towering pines near my home, day or night. I've hiked so many miles in all conditions, in both mountain lion and black bear country, and nothing bad has ever happened to me. The chances of something bad happening are very slim, trust me

 

[Passenger4224]

Walking in a city at night is more dangerous than a woods.

The woods has less humans. Way less humans.

 

[fightclub17]

Lobotomies aren't a thing anymore.