CTB in a few hours, wish me luck

[TrumooChocolateMilk]

I'm scared but determined. My method (detergent suicide) should be painless, as long as the chemicals I have are correct. My backup is just swallowing the entire medicine cabinet and hoping for the best. Even if it's painful, I'm willing to power through it. I haven't been able to cry for a long time now, but today is different. It hurts knowing that the people you love the most will be better off with you gone. I hope it's quick, I don't think I deserve any more pain. Wish me luck, thank you.

 

[Rezzienator]

May you find the solution and solace that you've always hoped for.

 

[lobster salad]

This sounds awful and extremely risky. As you know it's extremely painful and tastes horrible. I hope that you will rethink for better methods, cos if you somehow back out halfway - which is more than a minor possibility, your entire life is ruined. I cannot imagine having my large intestine sewed and used in the place of my gullet or my digestive tract stretched with surgery every week after a failed suicide.....

 

[TrumooChocolateMilk]

This sounds awful and extremely risky. As you know it's extremely painful and tastes horrible. I hope that you will rethink for better methods, cos if you somehow back out halfway - which is more than a minor possibility, your entire life is ruined. I cannot imagine having my large intestine sewed and used in the place of my gullet or my digestive tract stretched with surgery every week after a failed suicide.....

Of course I've never tried it, but apparently if the hydrogen sulfide is over 1000ppm, you will lose consciousness once you breath it. I've considered other methods, but they all require materials I can't purchase or technique that I'm not confident enough to match. I appreciate your concern though, if something like that happens, I'll steal a scalpel or something and go for the femoral

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that it has come to this. Life is so cruel and unfair and I know that it is unbearable when you are suffering so much. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[ProntoFim]

Of course I've never tried it, but apparently if the hydrogen sulfide is over 1000ppm, you will lose consciousness once you breath it. I've considered other methods, but they all require materials I can't purchase or technique that I'm not confident enough to match. I appreciate your concern though, if something like that happens, I'll steal a scalpel or something and go for the femoral

I am here if you need, may peace be with you aways and forever.

 

[lobster salad]

Of course I've never tried it, but apparently if the hydrogen sulfide is over 1000ppm, you will lose consciousness once you breath it. I've considered other methods, but they all require materials I can't purchase or technique that I'm not confident enough to match. I appreciate your concern though, if something like that happens, I'll steal a scalpel or something and go for the femoral

What if you pass out halfway from the fumes without gulping down enough for fatal damage? That will make your life 10x worse and you will miss out on your backups. As for them: Cutting the femoral takes a lot of guts because you have to cut the same wound over and over unless you take a fuckload of aspirin or something to prevent the clotting. OTC meds which your cabinet is likely to be stocked with are not potent enough to kill you many of the time, chances are you'll puke it up or just end up with organ failure and pain. This is documented on the site time and time again. I suggest waiting it out, talk to some people here on the chat page for example, do some other method that requires less effort, like hanging. I understand you problems with inability to purchase items, drugs are unobtainable with any certainty in my country due to punishment threats and so my method is to jump. Jumping still has less room for error than this imo.... I'm worried @TrumooChocolateMilk . Sending a hug

 

[sepetuk4s]

I'm in similar situation. But i was thinking Propane GAS with Exit BAG...? Don't you think that would work better...? And it can be purchased on every single gas station...? Seems easier. And more efficient..?

 

[TrumooChocolateMilk]

What if you pass out halfway from the fumes without gulping down enough for fatal damage? That will make your life 10x worse and you will miss out on your backups. As for them: Cutting the femoral takes a lot of guts because you have to cut the same wound over and over unless you take a fuckload of aspirin or something to prevent the clotting. OTC meds which your cabinet is likely to be stocked with are not potent enough to kill you many of the time, chances are you'll puke it up or just end up with organ failure and pain. This is documented on the site time and time again. I suggest waiting it out, talk to some people here on the chat page for example, do some other method that requires less effort, like hanging. I understand you problems with inability to purchase items, drugs are unobtainable with any certainty in my country due to punishment threats and so my method is to jump. Jumping still has less room for error than this imo.... I'm worried @TrumooChocolateMilk . Sending a hug

Yeah I just realized I sort of caused a misunderstanding, "detergent suicide" is what the method is called, but it usually doesn't even involve detergent. I was never planning on drinking anything, I understand why you were so worried now. Thank you for telling me about the OTC medication, going to rethink my backup. Appreciate the insight

 

[UpandDownPrincess]

Please, please, please rethink your method.

If you are using words like "apparently" you have not done enough research and will most likely fail. It seems that there are a lot of things that you are not aware of.

I am a "detergent suicide" survivor. I did tremendous amounts of research and computations to be sure that the gas would fill the space completely at a high ppm.

I was foiled by an unexpected interruption but you can do significant damage to yourself if you fail.

Please rethink this.

 

[Hotsackage]

Gl

 

[wrybuzzard]

This is always your choice, and you will find support whatever you decide.
I would just echo what other people have said, some more research could reduce the risk of extreme pain or disability.
Also, do you have a plan to prevent people who discover you from being harmed by the gas? (Signs etc.)
Hugs, and I hope you find peace.

 

[Rabhen]

I'm scared but determined. My method (detergent suicide) should be painless, as long as the chemicals I have are correct. My backup is just swallowing the entire medicine cabinet and hoping for the best. Even if it's painful, I'm willing to power through it. I haven't been able to cry for a long time now, but today is different. It hurts knowing that the people you love the most will be better off with you gone. I hope it's quick, I don't think I deserve any more pain. Wish me luck, thank you.

I wish I could stop crying, I wish I could go with you. Peace to you and a gentle leaving.

 

[Auto Immunity After]

The OP is refering to "chemical suicide" , you don't drink anything. You take 2 chemicals, one is an acid (like battery acid) you mix it in a bucket with a base, lawn fertilizer, insecticide etc. When you combine these 2 products they react and give off a chemical reaction........it smells like rotten eggs. You pass out in 1 breath.......you have to do this in a car or really small space with no air........if you have enough base plus acid combined and no air, you will die. The problem is a lot of time the combination is not correct and you pass out. You will wake up shortly after. You will live but you have exposed your body to gasses that damage you internally. Your digestion may not work after, your eyes can be severely damaged, you can have brain damage you can burn your skin. It takes a hazmat team to remove you from the space . You never recover fully and you can be charged legally if a fireman gets injured trying to get close to the exposure if you have no signs up allerting anyone to the chemicals on site.......Google Chemical Suicide for more information.

 

[CrossroadsCurious]

Peace be your journey!