I'm thinking of CTBing soon. I recently found a new job in software development and I hate it. Developing feels so lonely and isolated and I just hate it. I dont want to do this for my whole life till I die. But I also know that any other job I'd do would bother me in some way aswell. I dont want to continute like that.
Oh hell yeah.
I'm suicidal because of the expectation that I will have to go struggle against other apes to find a job, struggle against them while working that job, if I ever expect anything nice or to go my way I have to take it because the predators we are surrounded with are constantly working unconscious machinations which I have not had the privilege of being born with.
So I have to operate my machinations consciously, and that is a horrible awful existence. I will leave, and the apes will live, ignorant of their own predations.
There is no work which isn't social. I could probably contribute some good books to our species, but then again, there are already so many books. Do I really have anything useful to add lol
I'm suicidal because of the expectation that I will have to go struggle against other apes to find a job, struggle against them while working that job, if I ever expect anything nice or to go my way I have to take it because the predators we are surrounded with are constantly working unconscious machinations which I have not had the privilege of being born with.
So I have to operate my machinations consciously, and that is a horrible awful existence. I will leave, and the apes will live, ignorant of their own predations.
There is no work which isn't social. I could probably contribute some good books to our species, but then again, there are already so many books. Do I really have anything useful to add lol
derpyderpins
In the Service of the Queen
- Sep 19, 2023
- 1,861
Not an uncommon thought on here. Work is brutal, and a life of work is definitely one of the main causes of my suicidality. It's an unfortunate fact of life for most people.
And I've gone through the same line of thinking as you: there is no job out there that will be "good." No matter what, it's 8-10 hours a day doing something I absolutely would not do unless you paid me. It's simply too much time out of life to justify. You have to figure if the time outside work is worth it.
And I've gone through the same line of thinking as you: there is no job out there that will be "good." No matter what, it's 8-10 hours a day doing something I absolutely would not do unless you paid me. It's simply too much time out of life to justify. You have to figure if the time outside work is worth it.
ijustwishtodie
death will be my ultimate bliss
- Oct 29, 2023
- 5,214
I relate. I also want to ctb because I don't want to work. Working sounds absolutely brutal.
Why just @sserafim? A good amount of users here don't want to wage slave pointlessly for decades until they die
locked*n*loaded
Archangel
- Apr 15, 2022
- 7,256
Only because more vocal and forthright about it. It's like her "theme" in 99% of her postings (exaggerated of course).
Darkover
Angelic
- Jul 29, 2021
- 4,739
I can't believe this is the rest of my life.
Makes me want to die thinking about how much of my life I am wasting by slaving away at some dead-end job that couldn't give less of a shit about me. Having to work is soul-destroying. I can't do this for another 40+ years.
I can't believe we are expected to do this our whole lives. I'm having an existential crisis over it all. Every day feels like Groundhog's Day. Get up. Go to work. Come home late feeling so exhausted I have no time or energy to do anything. Sleep. Rinse and repeat pretty much until I die of old age. A whole life wasted.
Makes me want to die thinking about how much of my life I am wasting by slaving away at some dead-end job that couldn't give less of a shit about me. Having to work is soul-destroying. I can't do this for another 40+ years.
I can't believe we are expected to do this our whole lives. I'm having an existential crisis over it all. Every day feels like Groundhog's Day. Get up. Go to work. Come home late feeling so exhausted I have no time or energy to do anything. Sleep. Rinse and repeat pretty much until I die of old age. A whole life wasted.
neverLoved
Member
- May 4, 2024
- 42
I am currently in my first year of my degree and I don't even know why I got myself in to this. I haven't worked a 'real' job yet and already despise the future of possibly ever working. What is the point of me slaving hours of my week away just so I can look out to my days off. All of this just to be able to afford the basic needs of living??
I know I am privileged right now, I live at home and have basically no financial responsibilities. But just the thought of me having to work for the rest of my life is enough to CTB. I envy people who escape the rat race, whether that is by making enough of money or accepting living with the minimal needs. Although to ever make enough money it seems like you have to partake the rat race so that is out of the question for me.
I know I am privileged right now, I live at home and have basically no financial responsibilities. But just the thought of me having to work for the rest of my life is enough to CTB. I envy people who escape the rat race, whether that is by making enough of money or accepting living with the minimal needs. Although to ever make enough money it seems like you have to partake the rat race so that is out of the question for me.
steppenwolf
Not a student
- Oct 25, 2023
- 161
Standard procedure for any job you despise is to simply stop turning up for work without explanation.
Linda
Member
- Jul 30, 2020
- 1,685
Is it that you just don't like IT work? (If so, how did you get yourself into such a job?) Or is it that the particular project you are working on involves less people contact than you would like? Or is it that the particular department of the particular corporation you are working for isn't right for you? I think the first thing you need to do is figure out precisely what it is that isn't right. Only then can you really start thinking what to do about it.
Vicolo cieco
Student
- May 14, 2024
- 109
Unless I manage to get a comfy government job, I'll NEET until I finally gather up the courage to CTB.
Lookingtoflyfree
Specialist
- Jan 11, 2024
- 326
The work world is brutal now. I am completely burned out and CPTSD now complicated by work related and relationship related trauma. I can't think straight any more.
A 'bias for action in a fast paced culture with minimal support but must be open to continual feedback to improve' sounds like a great recipe for burnout and that they're actually prefer robots not humans as coworkers.
I used to want to work - now, not so much. I'm unemployed and running out of money so yay death. At least I won't be stuck on LinkedIn after I'm gone.
A 'bias for action in a fast paced culture with minimal support but must be open to continual feedback to improve' sounds like a great recipe for burnout and that they're actually prefer robots not humans as coworkers.
I used to want to work - now, not so much. I'm unemployed and running out of money so yay death. At least I won't be stuck on LinkedIn after I'm gone.
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