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Arrow

Arrow

Rewrite
May 1, 2020
769
@GoBack @NotGonnaLast you 2 are meant to be ! It's like assisting at a ping pong match at the olympic games. Gratz !
yeah i was gonna comment but i'd rather see the two of them go at it, i don't wanna ruin their flow
 
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enjolras

enjolras

Dead are useless if not to love the living more
Feb 13, 2020
1,293
Granted but you have to be in the worst boyband ever

I wish I could have a good Halloween night out now

Granted, but around a dead end, you meet the actual Jason from Friday the 13th. Turning back, Freddy is cornering you. Who do you choose ?

Wish my body odours were celebrated with applause wherever I go (wtf)
 
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GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
Granted your head will explode from the infinite knowledge

I wish I worked in a ice cream truck
 
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enjolras

enjolras

Dead are useless if not to love the living more
Feb 13, 2020
1,293
Granted your head will explode from the infinite knowledge

I wish I worked in a ice cream truck

Granted, unfortunately, you're diabetic, dear.

I wish there was a fifth season.
 
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GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
Granted, but around a dead end, you meet the actual Jason from Friday the 13th. Turning back, Freddy is cornering you. Who do you choose ?

Wish my body odours were celebrated with applause wherever I go (wtf)


Jason, all day

Granted they also have a colorful aura seen from afar
 
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N

NotGonnaLast

Wizard
Mar 31, 2020
606
Granted, unfortunately, you're diabetic, dear.

I wish there was a fifth season.
Granted it lasts for 1 year and is just silence and boring weather

I wish my family cares about me
 
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GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
Granted but never on christmas or birthdays

I wish I was born a cat
 
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N

NotGonnaLast

Wizard
Mar 31, 2020
606
Granted you're a stray and have a hard life

I wish I was a pornstar
 
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enjolras

enjolras

Dead are useless if not to love the living more
Feb 13, 2020
1,293
Granted it lasts for 1 year and is just silence and boring weather

I wished for only natural catastrophes ! :) Viva bad weather.

Granted it lasts for 1 year and is just silence and boring weather

I wish my family cares about me

Granted, but all you've known is to hop from family to family, as an orphan.

I wish I was a pornstar

Granted, with 1 testicle, gynecomastia (man boobs), in the midget / zoophile category.

I wish I was born a cat

Granted, born in a laboratory, under scientific experimentations until you can't take it (don't worry, you've got 9 lives)

I wish I walked on the moon.
 
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GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
Granted you're a stray and have a hard life

I wish I was a pornstar


Granted you can only perform on family quiz shows

I wish I had a superpower

I wish I could multi quote
 
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enjolras

enjolras

Dead are useless if not to love the living more
Feb 13, 2020
1,293
Granted you can only perform on family quiz shows

I wish I had a superpower

Granted, immortality it goes, in your current state of affairs
 
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Arrow

Arrow

Rewrite
May 1, 2020
769
I wish I could multi quote
granted but from now on no one will ever reply to your posts or even like them.

i wish i had a pet monkey who was my friend.
 
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Despondent

Despondent

Archangel
Dec 20, 2019
6,777
Granted: but the pet monkey is the size of your pinky and is your only friend.

I wish I was more focused
 
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Arrow

Arrow

Rewrite
May 1, 2020
769
I wish I was more focused
granted but every time you focus on something, you focus so hard that you forget everything about yourself and your entire life.

i wish my computer was the most powerful one in the world.
 
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Jumper Geo

Jumper Geo

Life's a bitch and then you die.
Feb 23, 2020
2,910
Granted: but on the 17-06-2020 the A/I becomes self aware and launches nuclear bombs, ending the World. Then a terminator goes back in time to laugh at you.

I wish I could heal people with my hands
 
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narval

narval

Enlightened
Jan 22, 2020
1,188
Granted. Greetings!, You are the last person in the world. Nobody to help.
I wish not to be asthmatic (your hands would be good...)
 
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FriendofDeath

FriendofDeath

Elementalist
May 22, 2020
833
Granted, but the pebbles ruin your teeth.

I wish I lived by an ocean...
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,705
I wish I lived by an ocean..

Granted, but you have to found a religion in order to be allowed to stay there tax-free.

I wish the world wanted to be saved.
 
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NotGonnaLast

Wizard
Mar 31, 2020
606
Granted the world wants to be saved but also knows that nothing they do will work. Congrats the world is now depressed!

I wish I had super speed
 
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Dead beat dad

Dead beat dad

Enlightened
Mar 5, 2019
1,030
Granted the world wants to be saved but also knows that nothing they do will work. Congrats the world is now depressed!

I wish I had super speed
Granted, but it is laced with huge amounts of laxative... That kind of speed...?

I wish I had a turkey sandwich
 
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NotGonnaLast

Wizard
Mar 31, 2020
606
Granted. The turkey is still alive *cluck cluck*

I wish I had super strength
 
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Arrow

Arrow

Rewrite
May 1, 2020
769
I wish I had super strength
granted, but everyone else also gets even MORE super strength and is significantly stronger than you, making you the physically weakest human on earth.

i wish there was universal basic income
 
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narval

narval

Enlightened
Jan 22, 2020
1,188
Granted! It comes with a crazy monetary inflation. Global scale. A never seen before financial crisis arrives.
I wish dark theme in SS
 
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Notwinnernotawin

Notwinnernotawin

Specialist
Apr 4, 2020
341
Granted! It comes with a crazy monetary inflation. Global scale. A never seen before financial crisis arrives.
I wish dark theme in SS
Granted. But it's so dark you can't see anything.
I wish every year after 2000 was just a cruel joke a drunk man is telling at a crowded bar and we're just so into the joke we think that's our reality.
 
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N

NotGonnaLast

Wizard
Mar 31, 2020
606
Granted. He finishes and you slowly realise he was actually telling the future.

I wish I was hairless everywhere but on my head
 
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FriendofDeath

FriendofDeath

Elementalist
May 22, 2020
833
Granted, but the hair is matted and grows up to 10 feet every night.

I wish I could visit the Egyptian pyramids.
 
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N

NotGonnaLast

Wizard
Mar 31, 2020
606
Granted: the second you get to them you have a heart attack at their beauty and pass away.

I wish I was asleep right now
 
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Despondent

Despondent

Archangel
Dec 20, 2019
6,777
Granted: but you'll be asleep for the next three days and will be awake for a good month afterwards.

I wish I wasn't so apathetic
 
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FriendofDeath

FriendofDeath

Elementalist
May 22, 2020
833
Granted - and you're now in charge of 300 organizations you've created for various causes and you've accumulated enough air miles to fly first class for the rest of your life!

I wish I never had to scoop another litterbox!
 
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