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locusdelicti

locusdelicti

Member
Jan 6, 2019
74
Congratulations, you're on a one-way train to Valparaiso (aka, Hell On Earth).

I wish every time I opened my wallet, I had exactly the amount of money I need at the moment.
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
7,623
Granted but they're looking for someone else (story of my life...)

I wish I could sing.
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,740
Granted but you'll never be able to talk without singing

I wish I could handle unlimited stress without getting depressed and giving up
 
L

LonelyEmerald

Experienced
Nov 26, 2022
233
Wish granted-now you never relax and no one likes you. I wish I had friends.
 
jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,740
Granted but you'll have hundreds and be bombarded with their problems

I wish I didn't get so upset by things
 
L

LonelyEmerald

Experienced
Nov 26, 2022
233
Wish granted, but you never feel negative emotions again. I wish the Carolina Panthers would win the super bowl.
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,740
Granted but they will always win with ease, it will get boring.

I wish I wasn't so sensitive to criticism
 
U

Unending

-
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
Wish granted but now you're sensitive to praise
I wish I wasn't anxious about it being so late...
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,740
Granted but now you will get less sleep

I wish people on SS wouldn't get angry with me when all I try to do is help
 
U

Unending

-
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
Granted but now they'll get sad at you
I wish I didn't feel like an alien wearing an obviously fake human costume everytime that I left my house
 
StillBreathing

StillBreathing

Student
Dec 4, 2022
147
Wish granted but now you're a dog.

I wish I was more rich than Elon Musk.
 
D

Drowned Mermaid

Member
Jul 18, 2022
8
Wish granted: Elon musk's gross assets now have a total value of $0.17. Yours have a total value of $1.95.

I wish I was good at roller skating.
 
U

Unending

-
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
Wish granted but in order to obtain this skill you had to have them permanently installed on your feet

I wish my bus could arrive at a reasonable hour. It distresses me immensely how I must wait any longer.
 
Unlovable98

Unlovable98

I wish I was lovable
Sep 7, 2022
28
granted. It will arrive in 100 years, 5 months, 12 days, 14 hours, 27 minutes and 13 seconds.

I wish i had a girlfriend.
 
U

Unending

-
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
Granted, you will meet your new gf in exactly 100 & 1/4 years, 5 months, 12 days, 14 hours, 13 seconds, and .00676² x 2,000,000,000 milliseconds.

black and white death GIF
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
7,623
Granted but you are now a zombie, wandering around groaning forever.

I wish everyone could do a job they found fulfilling and that paid them enough to live a reasonable life.
 
Csmith8827

Csmith8827

"It's all just a dream"
Oct 26, 2019
781
Granted, but...as a result of humans being so prosperous and happy and pro-creating, the planet will be depleted of all of its natural resources by 2030 making life on earth unsustainable for future generations.

I wish I disappeared and never came back or woke up to this garbage world again. Or to any world for that matter.
 
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U

Unending

-
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
Granted but you have to wake up to go somewhere else that isn't a world

I wish all the unhealthy coping mechanisms were actually healthy.
 
Csmith8827

Csmith8827

"It's all just a dream"
Oct 26, 2019
781
Granted but you have to wake up to go somewhere else that isn't a world

I wish all the unhealthy coping mechanisms were actually healthy.
that doesn't make sense because in my wish i said i didn't want to wake up and you can't violate my wish...
 
U

Unending

-
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
that doesn't make sense because in my wish i said i didn't want to wake up and you can't violate my wish...
Oh, okay. I thought it was specifically if you woke up in a world. Was trying to be silly with it.

Granted, but you disappear at a random indefinite time in the future.
 
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