Discussion College, job anxiety and suicidal ideations

[fox_wannabe]

Do any of you feel suicidal because anxieties related to college or your prospects for job?

Seeing people work and thinking about all demands put up by work or my college overwhelms me. Every failure makes me spiral into suicidal thoughts, and I fail a lot.

 

[singsreignrebuilder]

Definitely. Every assignment, no matter how minor, amplifies the suicidal thoughts. As I am very lazy, both physically and intellectually, I have chosen a comparably easy major in the humanities, yet it fills me with dread over lack of purpose and employability. The only reason I'm still doing it is that it allows me to stall wageslavery for a while. I haven't really failed anything yet, like you mentioned, as it really is very easy, but I can definitely relate.

 

[Feeding Pigeons]

Do any of you feel suicidal because anxieties related to college or your prospects for job?

Oh absolutely. I'm screwed as far as job prospects go.

 

[fox_wannabe]

I do not know what to do. Staying in college is hard, you never know what awaits you in job market.

 

[Insomniac]

Oh absolutely. I'm screwed as far as job prospects go.

oh boi. same.
I graduated like two years ago and still haven't gotten or searched for a single job. there's no way I can explain 2 years of void to them. not to mention that it took me 5years to complete a fucking BA..

I do not know what to do. Staying in college is hard, you never know what awaits you in job market.

a generally good advice is to stay away as far as possible from trends and stick to the courses or programs that are generally considered difficult and old fashioned but will provide you with strong foundations to get you anywhere.

I wish I had followed that advice.

 

[sivvie]

My parents are pushing me to start Uni but I am in no way, shape, or form ready. That is factoring in to me dying earlier than I was planning :/

I don't want to go through all the processes, I don't want to start. I don't even want to leave the house. But I took pretty much two gap years and they think I shouldn't delay it any longer so they're practically forcing me to start.

I don't have the mental or physical well being to handle it. I barely pulled through last time I went to Uni, I was so close to failing all my classes the last semester, my profs had to give me extra credit.

It's so depressing. With my dad coming to visit us as well, I have no choice but to go this week or the next.

 

[Eddypaddy]

i studied vehicle informatics in germany. Im a software engineer right now. I earn a good amount of money but i hate the job so much. Studying was the biggest mistake of my life. I hate the stress and the way to complicated work i have to manage all by myself in the sozially isolated homeoffice. I wish i could turn back time and to an apprenticeship.

 

[Crazy4u]

I used to be passionate about work until I realized that all results, skills, and work don't matter. It is all about politics. I stopped caring and I'm not ambitious anymore. It is all fake.

 

[Onthe29th]

I have shallow insensitive parents… I don't want to go into detail but I'm sure you know where I'm going with this. My reason to ctb is definitely in the school/work/financial category. There's a little more to it then that but it's mostly shallow bullshit that I wish didn't matter but it matters so much that I would ctb for that reason.

 

[Puffinz]

Yes absolutely. At the start of college I chose a very difficult major because I didn't really know what to do but I thought I was interested in the subject. I soon realized that I not only hated it but that it was extremely challenging. 4 years later I've somehow made it through my classes (don't feel like I've learned anything) and am going to graduate soon, but man I really really hate the work. Every time I get stuck on an assignment I give up almost instantly and start thinking about suicide for about 20 minutes. Then I go back and try to figure out what I did wrong, fail, think about suicide for 20 minutes, try again, fail...... I have no idea what I would even use my degree for. I hate the type of work I'm doing now, but I'm so close to finishing now that I just have to try and scrape by my last few classes.

 

[fox_wannabe]

Thank you all for your responses. <3

a generally good advice is to stay away as far as possible from trends and stick to the courses or programs that are generally considered difficult and old fashioned but will provide you with strong foundations to get you anywhere.

I try man, I will get my degree in 2 years if everything goes well, I study STEM subject.

I used to be passionate about work until I realized that all results, skills, and work don't matter. It is all about politics. I stopped caring and I'm not ambitious anymore. It is all fake.

That is what I am afraid of. As non NT person I am really bad at manipulative social games played at work place.

I hate the type of work I'm doing now, but I'm so close to finishing now that I just have to try and scrape by my last few classes.

I wish you luck with those classes.

I was thinking about ctb If I fail at college. There would be nowhere for me to go or nothing for me to do If I fail. I cannot imagine working in dead end job. But maybe something changes for me... idk.

 

[EraseRewind]

I've always felt anxious about my prospects and college, I'm a mature student so at my age it's going to be tough to get a job but doubly worse because I have criminal record, all down to my own terrible behaviour, so not much hope.

I got my degree last year so I stayed on to do masters, but I've found it too hard and mostly it won't help my prospects.

My fear is rising as I know this is it my final year, when I fail this course there's no where left to hide.

 

[little helpers]

it's like you walk into a dead end and people just be yelling "keep trying!". no roads ahead, if any there's not one for self-actualization, how much can you really try.

I'm taking it quite metaphorically for some reason. so, pretty oddly, I got reminded of these Rush lyrics, "the way out is the way in".

so walk the other way. the dead end can symbolize school/jobs, which, as much as I hate to admit, I'm in this very situation myself, and frequently there's no way to back out. can't just go live the homestead, "self reliance" BS, with no fucking money. but if you can, then take a break. give yourself a temporary "out". you can always get on with it later.

though more often, the dead end is simply a metaphor for life. society's making us work and over-produce while we barely can afford just sustenance. here, the way out is nonetheless the way in. we came into this world from oblivion, and the out, is to go back in there.

 

[tieiwi]

My heart goes out to you. I have been procrastinating my college application because I keep thinking "im going to kms anyway". I don't have high hopes for myself. It's really hard being suicidal while also trying to function with the rest of society.

 

[Hurt]

Do any of you feel suicidal because anxieties related to college or your prospects for job?

Seeing people work and thinking about all demands put up by work or my college overwhelms me. Every failure makes me spiral into suicidal thoughts, and I fail a lot.

I work at home but sometimes I have to meet people and I feel very anxious. I had social anxiety all my life. College is too hard I have serious focusing issues. Im like: why do i study if im gonna ctb ?

My heart goes out to you. I have been procrastinating my college application because I keep thinking "im going to kms anyway". I don't have high hopes for myself. It's really hard being suicidal while also trying to function with the rest of society.

I can relate to that. That's how I feel and it's so hard to keep functioning while I all I want is to give up.