Clarity and Questions

[IwanttodieASAP]

Evening.

I would say "good", except it's not. This day is hell for so many reasons. A year ago today I was with the nost beautiful girl, I rook her to this amazing Christmas village display. We had already been dating a year and a half so don't think I was just madly emphatic about her. I was deeply and am deeply in love with her. It was one of thr best nights of my life and we decided we would bring our future family there every Christmas eve.

Now here I sit trying to die, drink my sorrow and regret away. I ruined everything.

I want to set the record straight though, everyone's support on here has been something I need to finish this hell but it really brings me even nore down when people belittle me (even unintentionally as most of it is), saying stuff about don't rush it, or think things through and make it sounds like I am jumping in this and just being rash. I have thought this out for months. And yes, I know some of you have been thinking this out for years, and I'm sorry for you, but I'm bot bring rash. I have thought more then most would. Heck, I wrote and self published a book on this. I am not being emotional and when I ask questions I wish people would take me seriously rather then say things that only belittle and hurt me more.

With that being said, I have being trying and planning my journey for some time now and while I have a more full proff plan my SI is making it very hard to follow through. It's not like it will be easier as time goes by. SI is SI , no matter how suicidal you are. But tonight us such a hell of a Night that I think I may be able to POSSIBLY overcome my SI on self hate alone.

There is a lake by my house, it's in the single digits outside. If I were to jump into the lake and fight SI as long as I could before my body went into zombie mode and forced me to get out, how long would it take me approximately to leave? It's over a mile away from my house and literally no one at all will be there obviously, so even if SI had me trying to get to warmth, I probably couldn't. So how long would it take to die?

Yes, I know it can be terribly painful , yes, I know if gone wrong I can lose my fingers, ears, toes, etc... I am aware of the vast list of negatives, please give me an estimate on how long it would take for me to slip into the other side


Please help

*anything spelled wrong is not me being rash or emotional, I just suck at typing

 

[locked*n*loaded]

please give me an estimate on how long it would take for me to slip into the other side

I think you can Google that for your answers. What a lousy way to go, IMO. I know you say you understand about the intense pain and losing fingers, toes, etc, but I think the pain is going to be more than you can even imagine. just my 2 cents. You can do as you want since it is your life. Good luck.

 

[IwanttodieASAP]

I think you can Google that for your answers. What a lousy way to go, IMO. I know you say you understand about the intense pain and losing fingers, toes, etc, but I think the pain is going to be more than you can even imagine. just my 2 cents. You can do as you want since it is your life. Good luck.

Thanks for that...

 

[Forever Sleep]

As @locked*n*loaded said, I imagine if you Google hypothermia in water, you'll get an idea of the symptoms and length of time it may take. I do know someone who fell in a lake and said they felt quite early on, a feeling of confusion. I don't know whether that would be good or bad. You'd hope it might numb some of the other senses but it could also be very distressing. Personally, it sounds like a horrible way to go to me and I'm sorry you are in such a dark place to be considering it. I'm not too sure it's that quick either but I expect there must be information out there on specific cases.

One of the stranger things I've heard about hypothermia is that people are sometimes found naked. Supposedly, in the final stages, you can actually get the sensation that you are too hot- so start stripping off. Sorry- not very relevant- just an odd fact really. I'm sorry you are suffering so deeply.