Discussion Checklist before deciding to CTB

[klantedklaw]

I understand the rationale of deciding to CTB is different for everyone and not "one size fits all", but I'm wondering what you think someone should achieve (or least attempt) to check off before they CTB.

For example:

• Get MH treatment for at least 6 months
• Get blood tests to rule out any health problems that may be making you suicidal (hormonal issues)
• Logically examine any stressors or reasons for wanting to CTB and resolving them (eg moving away from parents, becoming financially stable, etc)
• Making a friend
• Traveling overseas
• Taking mushrooms/ psychedelics
• Setting a date to CTB well into the future (to prevent rash decisions)

The reason I ask is because I THINK consciously that I should continue living, BUT FEEL sub-consciously like I want to CTB; as though two parts of my being are paradoxically fighting against each other. By having a checklist I would be able to attempt to resolve my depression while also logically justifying my decision to CTB ("I did all these things, but nothing works - time to CTB").

 

[Nightfoot]

That's a good list. You might also be open to adding things to it, later, as they occur to you as well as being open to cancelling the CTB date if things change for you.

 

[klantedklaw]

That's a good list. You might also be open to adding things to it, later, as they occur to you as well as being open to cancelling the CTB date if things change for you.

thats the plan, I want to hopefully never CTB and want to do everything in my power not to

 

[fedup1982]

I'd add:
- writing suicide letters explaing everything and apologising if appropriate for what you're leaving them to deal with, it's brutal but a good test of your readiness
- telling people you care about your desire to CTB
- being completely honest with MH professionals

 

[ElTopo]

• Traveling overseas
• Taking mushrooms/ psychedelics

Amsterdam it is then I guess

 

[bravelytothewinter]

I understand the rationale of deciding to CTB is different for everyone and not "one size fits all", but I'm wondering what you think someone should achieve (or least attempt) to check off before they CTB.

For example:

• Get MH treatment for at least 6 months
• Get blood tests to rule out any health problems that may be making you suicidal (hormonal issues)
• Logically examine any stressors or reasons for wanting to CTB and resolving them (eg moving away from parents, becoming financially stable, etc)
• Making a friend
• Traveling overseas
• Taking mushrooms/ psychedelics
• Setting a date to CTB well into the future (to prevent rash decisions)

The reason I ask is because I THINK consciously that I should continue living, BUT FEEL sub-consciously like I want to CTB; as though two parts of my being are paradoxically fighting against each other. By having a checklist I would be able to attempt to resolve my depression while also logically justifying my decision to CTB ("I did all these things, but nothing works - time to CTB").

think all of these are reasonable responses.

 

[SailorBlue]

Your list is good and the one of fedup1982.

In my case, I have accomplished everything except traveling overseas and becoming financially stable with a deadline to achieve this goal or CTB in June 2026.