lovelypirategirl
I'm not ok, I'm just good at pretending I am
- Mar 22, 2020
- 39
Hi SS,
Long time, no see. It's been a couple of years since last time I logged in in here, but I guess this feeling never really goes away.
I'm back again in a depression hole, it's so bad that it physically hurts. I feel a void in my chest and in my insides, that is gut-wrenching. I just want to stop it. I wish I would never feel it again, but I know that inevitably, sooner or later, it always comes back.
I wish I could die. Right now. I wish a lightning would strike me and kills me instantly. I wish I would get a mysterious diseases that takes my life in a couple of days.
I just don't want to kill myself. I don't want my family to go through the pain, trauma and stigma of dealing with me taking my own life. I just hate being in this position... is there a way to cause your own death without people suspecting that you actually were the one behind it?
Long time, no see. It's been a couple of years since last time I logged in in here, but I guess this feeling never really goes away.
I'm back again in a depression hole, it's so bad that it physically hurts. I feel a void in my chest and in my insides, that is gut-wrenching. I just want to stop it. I wish I would never feel it again, but I know that inevitably, sooner or later, it always comes back.
I wish I could die. Right now. I wish a lightning would strike me and kills me instantly. I wish I would get a mysterious diseases that takes my life in a couple of days.
I just don't want to kill myself. I don't want my family to go through the pain, trauma and stigma of dealing with me taking my own life. I just hate being in this position... is there a way to cause your own death without people suspecting that you actually were the one behind it?