I don't think I've ever had so much anxiety reading a CTB thread before. I got the vibe that the OP was so unsure of her decision to CTB while preparing to CTB. I had inner trembling reading this thread. Committing to a plan to CTB when you still have the desire to live must take so much strength and resolve. I felt the visceral presence of her SI in this thread.
I hope that she had the safest of travels, and a peaceful transition. What a crazy feeling it is to be authentically suicidal.