If you did post in the recovery section with some degree of intention, you may have some degree of uncertainty (even if subconscious). It might not be a bad idea to postpone your plans until you identify or explore other options that are not as final.
You are probably old enough to have seen changes in your life (sometimes things get worse, sometimes things get better). If you are at a point when things are bad, you may also wish to consider that this also could change.
If you do decide to proceed, you would probably want to do more research as it sounds like there are aspects that you are unfamiliar with. It may be similar to enlisting in the military. One might go into it for one reason, only to find out they were mistaken in their understanding. However, in that case, they have only lost the time of their enlistment.
Regardless of your decision, it may help to know that there are people who will care about you and that you could care about.
