Can someone help me?

[Idon'tknow828]

I need help/advice!


I'm not gonna reveal my real name but my nick name is Sky. I'm 19F and from the US. I don't like being the kind of person who leaches or asks for things, that's not me. However, I'm in a seriously fucked up place right now.

Last night I heavily contemplated suicide. I had SN in hand and all. It made me cry like a baby lol. I realized that I don't actually want to to die. I just don't want to live the life I'm living.

For context my parents are what most people consider insane or mentally ill. It's a lot to explain here but that pretty much sums it up. They're dragging me down with them. My suicide attempt was a way to escape that but that's when I realized I don't actually want to die I just want to get away from them.

I'm not overdramatizing the situation like many people would expect a teenager to. They are truly unwell and I can't save them from themselves. So i need to save myself.

My sister has been kind enough to open her home up to me after I asked for help last night. However, she's in a tough place herself and has kids so asking for anything more is inappropriate and unacceptable. I'm thankful that I just have a place to go.

Where the dilemma comes in at is, I don't have enough money to get to her place or sustain myself until i get a job and a paycheck (which hopefully won't be more than a couple of months.)

The car that I'm using to drive 12-14 hours to get to her is in poor condition and I don't think it will make the trip without repairs. I thought of just leaving the car and getting a plane ticket but I'm gonna need my own mode of transportation when I'm there.

Does someone know of a way to help me? Any resources I could use. Or methods for quick cash?

If you've made it this far thank you for hearing me out and listening to my story!

 

[turkishsweet]

Factor in the charge of gas and if it can withstand the journey. If it's more expensive or if you're unsure, purchase a plane ticket. Less stress with the journey.

It's going to be hard before it gets better, keep that in mind. I don't know the ins and outs for resources that can help you just because I'm ignorant, but check if you're entitled to government assistance. Your local church should have also have good advice on where to go for financial aid. List things you don't need on sites like Depop for any extra money. Budget, make a map of what's coming in and out so you can cut off unnecessary costs for now. Don't put yourself in proximity to SN. At all, not even in your drawer.

Building a better future for yourself is hard, especially when your parents aren't cooperative. Good luck, update us please.

 

[trashprincess]

If you have anything to sell, that would be a good start. I've heard Facebook Marketplace is good for selling things somewhat easily.

All the support I've gotten has been from joining a couple churches. I say that as a transgender woman. Your mileage may vary, but there are communities out there that want to help people, if you're willing to look for them. I found mine by googling queer-affirming churches in my area.

You can also look into social work kinda help. My church and my local library has social workers that will meet with anyone who needs help. Even if you don't know what to ask for, they might know what kind of assistance you can access.

Talking helps too. I'm here to listen, and many others here are as well. You are encouraged to reach out, we'd all be happy to help

It's amazing the strength you have. You deserve so much better, and I hope you can get all the help you need.

*Hugs*

 

[Stormy Raine]

You can try to donate blood or plasma. Im almost certain they pay you the same day.

 

[SaltySuh]

You can try to donate blood or plasma. Im almost certain they pay you the same day.

This.

 

[Coldpizza22]

It's ok to ask for help. Don't be afraid to ask your sister for help. I myself haven't always helped my younger sister when she was in a few low points in her life, maybe bcs she got preferential treatment from our parents and i kinda feel bad about it (I'm 21, she's 17). I try to help her a little more now. I don't know why it would be inappropriate or unacceptable to ask for help.

Just stay with your sister for now. Don't feel like a burden. You said she has kids, you can help her out with that. Moms are very busy, you can go get groceries for her, babysit the kids, do laundry, cook, clean the apartment. If you don't know how to do those things, she can show you how to do it, the knowledge will help you live on your own, when the time comes. I can almost guarantee she'll appreciate the extra help. Being a parent is hard work and we're all so busy.

As for money. I'm not in the US, so i don't know the specific organizations, but there are churches and other humanitarian organizations who help people in need. My family got some help, when we needed it. Don't be afraid to ask, they can offer clothes, food, basic hygiene products. You can Google local churches, Red Cross units or similar organisations. Some people mentioned plasma donations, that's also one option to get some money. Although they don't pay for blood donations. In my region you get a meal and the day off work if you go and do a blood donation. They don't do paid plasma donations though. You should look into, if there are any safehouses for women or any government resources.

There's currently a labour shortage. Look at local bars and restaurants, they might be looking for people to serve food. They sometimes have notices that they're looking workers. Girls are preferred over guys, but they can't say that in the ad. The pay probably isn't great, but you might be able to get some money. And don't be afraid to stay with your sister even if you get a job. Stay with her while you work and save up some money, before you move out. You can split the costs of living, so it's beneficial for both of you.

As for transportation. You could try to get someone to take a look at the car. I'm nit a mechanic, but I'd take a look at the car if someone asked me to. If you could get someone knowledgeable enough to take a look at it. You're probably not in a situation ti get a new one, i use public transport as a student, it's not great, but it's good enough. I'm working on getting a car, it's almost impossible to live without one. I'd probably get an older cheaper one like a Toyota Corolla, these cars run ok, if they've been maintained.

Don't ve afraid to ask for help, you can always return it later.

 

[todienomore]

what do you think is wrong with the car? Odds might be better than you think.

 

[Idon'tknow828]

My signals don't work. The dash is pealing because of the extreme heat. The shocks in my car are so terrible that whenever I drive over the slightest bump I'm practically flying. In addition, my windshield whispers are broken. It's a 2001 buick Lasabre

what do you think is wrong with the car? Odds might be better than you think.

I don't think it will make the 12-14 hour drive

 

[todienomore]

My signals don't work. The dash is pealing because of the extreme heat. The shocks in my car are so terrible that whenever I drive over the slightest bump I'm practically flying. In addition, my windshield whispers are broken. It's a 2001 buick Lasabre

I don't think it will make the 12-14 hour drive

yeah my suspension is completely shot too, driving feels like sailing, steering input is like putting a golf ball, you turn the wheel a bit and wait to see where it ends up lol.

With the windshield wipers you should be fine as long as its not something a state trooper would visibly notice, write you up for 'faulty equipment.' Just keep an eye on the weather radar.

electrical could be messed up with the turn signals but i bet you could get it done with a screwdriver and a youtube video, might just be bulbs or a fuse. A guy at the auto parts store might be willing to help, youd be surprised. You really wont even need em much especially if you get to cities away from rush hour times.

i have limped cars all over the country with issues like that or worse, just check your fluid levels before leaving (brake fluid, engine oil, coolant only when cold), cold tire pressure.

also maybe dont drive in the worst heat of the day if is above 95f to take it easy on the cooling system especially.

maybe there is more wrong but your odds are good i think

 

[Pluto]

An easy option with the car is to sell it as is for a few hundred and then buy something else (unless you can get away with not having a car) after you move. Unless you have DIY skills or have someone who can help you, old cars are best treated as disposable.

Once you have any sort of job, a credit card will help give you a bit of a buffer for living costs, but be sure to stay disciplined.

The other advice is to start paying attention to healing your nervous system after what you've been through. Leaving a dysfunctional environment is only the beginning. I am currently starting to research this channel:

https://www.youtube.com/@TherapyinaNutshell