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noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,445
I am not an expert in that. Though I try to help with the knowledge that I have. I am not perfect at breaking with bad habits which increase my depression.

I try to keep them at a low dosage. If I recognize I can't get rid of something I allow it for a low dosage. I do this especially with my depression and suicidality. In the evening before I go to sleep I am visiting this forum and open up about all my suicidal thoughts which I have. And I have a lot of them on a daily basis but I had worse times in the past. Being in this forum is like a valve for me. I have really so much thoughts about suicide that it is impossible to cope with them in a healthy manner. It is relieving for me to share my thoughts here so that I am not so alone with my problems. The loneliness sometimes can be soulcrushing when you are suicidal.

My idea is allowing negative thinking patterns only for a short period of time. With a minimum amount. To be honest I don't know whether a therapist would agree on that. I had depressive rituals before I went to sleep. They took me like 1-2 hours. This was way too long. My therapist recommended me to decrease the amount so that I need less and less time for that. In the end only a medication helped me to overcome that. So as I often recommend it. If there is therapy available for you you should try that. But I know some of you can't pay for it which makes me very sad and angry.

I think it is important to recognize your negative thinking patterns. In psychotherapy you can analyze them and maybe you will find out what is the reason for your damaging behavior. For me it is a comforting feeling to know that most of my struggles come from the abuse and bullying that I had to endure in the past. At least I don't have to blame myself for my messed up life. Reading literature about your illness can help to recongnize negative thinking patterns.

Especially depressive thinking patterns can be pretty nasty. (but I also know the thinking spiral which causes mania). There is for example the one which makes you feel hopeless and powerless to change anything. As if there was no end of the misery and you could do nothing against that. If you now ask yourself what approaches can work when you are in this depressive spiral I have made a long thread to answer that question.
Depression can delude a person. You feel hopeless despite the fact it is not. For many there will come better times. There are ways how to recover from depression. Here I have some approaches in a thread but opening up to a therapist would be probably the best solution.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/a-guide-how-to-fight-nasty-depressions.85990/

I have a lot of OCD (compulsory thoughts) and I extremely obsessed with ruminating. I worry a lot on a daily basis. It is probably very different how individuals cope with that. I can't give a perfect guide for that. I only can speak from my experience. It is important to find a balance between having time to ruminate and actively trying to solve your problems. Sometimes problems seem unsolvable but maybe you can make even tiny steps in the right direction. I try to avoid fatalism and I try to fight. Life throws shit at me every time, I have experienced so much shit but I am too stubborn to accept my fate. I have more or less a support group. Friends, family and professionals who support me. It would be probably very good for other people to have such a group. But I also understand that not everyone is that priviledged as me with that. And I truely feel sorry for them.

One way to deal with ruminating is distracting me. I am doing this on an extreme basis. I am doing a lot of multitasking. I do so much different stuff at the same time so that I can't concentrate on my sorrows. This is for me the best help I know. I do this a lot. But sometimes if you are really struggling it also just okay just to make it through the day. If you are in extreme pain don't be too harsh on yourself.

It would be good for to you find something that gives your life meaning. Or to find something which is very very important for you. For example caring for animals. For it is more metaphysical beliefs etc. which I worship. I don't mean you have to turn religious or something like that (I am atheist.) . But it would be good if would not become totally nihilistic towards life. Like Jordan Peterson put it. If you become a nihilist and believe in nothing there remains only thing. Pain. Pain is so really that you can't rid of it just by questioning its existence. This really helped me. I try to believe in higher values. Something that gives me communion and empathy. Something which is worth fighting for.

I hope I could help anyone with this thread. I am not a professional I also can give bad advices. Always be careful with advices from the internet. I can also make mistakes.
Maybe you can give me a another advice how I can get get rid of my bad habits. I am interested in your thoughts about that topic. And your ways how to deal with it.

Hugs.
 
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timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,117
A sensitive heart that seeks to reach out and help others shows a spark of light that can be the foundation of a new start.
 

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