Being a woman in this society is so unfair

[Meteora]

I suggest we open a thread where men can tell their struggles. And if they want us women to be respectful and empathetic they better behave here.

 

[Oliver]

We were not meant to hate each other.

Why do the elite hate the nuclear family? Don't they benefit from it (people having children aka more future wageslaves)?

They need future workers of course, but it seems they just mass import people from the third world because they are willing to work for less money and will put up with more shit, I believe. Overall, I think it's about control. I think it's all about getting us separated. Wanting us all to live in tiny apartments and completely under surveillance. Like China or North Korea - or so it seems that way. But I think I should just stop now since I surely did not come to this site to debate conspiracy theories.

I was just a little pissed off about OP's "all men are bastard" approach. That's as dumb as saying "woman are only good for sex". I just don't get this gender-hatred. I surely don't hate all women. Furthermore, I think both genders have it hard in todays modern (shit) world.

 

[dragonofenvy]

Your struggles are valid. But try to be mindful of others, when someone is saying that something bad happened to them, the worse thing to do is to try to one-up them by comparing your struggles. It IS hard being a woman, just because you don't have personal experience of that doesn't make it any less true. Empathy, folks.

I don't think I tried to one-up them. I never said anywhere in my first post on the first page that men have it harder, nor did I say women have it harder. I said that I wanted to understand the problem since there are a lot of men who don't. I NEVER compared struggles anywhere in my post. I think the worst thing I said was "I think misandry is completely valid given your life experience, but if that's valid that also means the misogyny (NOT talking at an institutional/government level) is also valid given someone's life experience as well is it not? Either both are okay, or none of them are okay." The whole point of my post was that if you want men to understand you can't just attack them expecting them to be won over it by it. Likewise you can't attack women and expect them to agree with you. That's all my post was about, I was referring to the very last sentence of OP's post and was merely saying that if you are going to attack a group of people then that group of people won't want to understand you. Nothing more. If there's something in it I missed that led you to the conclusion that I was being insensitive I'd like to know specifically what it was because I did not want to be like that. All I wanted to do was understand because as you said, I never experienced it since I'm not a woman, but I did want to understand it. Is that so bad?

I deleted my post just after you replied to it because I didn't see the point in doing this anymore. There isn't ever going to be a conversation about this. Neither side wants to cooperate.

If you think I'm wrong about everything I said fair enough. Like I said in the first post, I put myself in front of the firing squad and got shot. Not sure what I expected. Why is asking to be able to understand the problem considered not being empathetic? I'm genuinely confused as to what I did wrong. I never said being a woman wasn't hard. I don't know where this conclusion is coming from and would like to know what I said that made you think that because that was not my intention.

Thank you for being respectful in your response to me btw.

 

[DreamEnd]

I suggest we open a thread where men can tell their struggles. And if they want us women to be respectful and empathetic they better behave here

The thing is. If a man opens up a thread calling all women misandrists that treat him like shit and that they have superiority complex he will just be called an incel in the comments. The ops post is strangely similar to that sentiment so why call one out and not the other?

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Men are more likely to be homeless, more likely to be drug addicts, more likely to die by suicide and they die 4-5 years earlier than women on average. That's just a few

Women are more likely to be X, Y and Z. This is a circular argument, unfortunately. I'm glad you can agree to the rest. Society is unfair to everyone, there is unfortunately a good reason why women would have housing prioritised over men in any case and I think you can see why that is.

 

[CTB Dream]

Undrstd how feel many ppl hars me, want say this life all nonsns unvrs gv injury damage no care ml fml also all ppl betray say injury damage no mtr gndr human all scum all betray leave etc say injury damage all no care , human species scum this ml fml all scum all no care injury damage

 

[Meteora]

I was just a little pissed off about OP's "all men are bastard" approach. That's as dumb as saying "woman are only good for sex"

I think she said "being a woman is unfair" and that s just true in many ways......
Where did you read "all men are bastards"?
And besides, it is her experience and opinion. Why does it piss men ( you) off? I dont get it really.

 

[dragonofenvy]

I think she said "being a woman is unfair" and that s just true in many ways......
Where did you read "all men are bastards"?
And besides, it is here experience and opinion. Why does it piss men off? I dont get it really.

"It feels like men just have a superiority complex that the world itself likes to stroke for them."
"I wish men could ever understand this concept, but no matter what they won't."

 

[Meteora]

"It feels like men just have a superiority complex that the world itself likes to stroke for them."
"I wish men could ever understand this concept, but no matter what they won't."

Ok sounds generalizing, I get it.

 

[Pipsqueak!]

I don't think I tried to one-up them. I never said anywhere in my first post on the first page that men have it harder, nor did I say women have it harder. I said that I wanted to understand the problem since there are a lot of men who don't. I NEVER compared struggles anywhere in my post. I think the worst thing I said was "I think misandry is completely valid given your life experience, but if that's valid that also means the misogyny (NOT talking at an institutional/government level) is also valid given someone's life experience as well is it not? Either both are okay, or none of them are okay." The whole point of my post was that if you want men to understand you can't just attack them expecting them to be won over it by it. Likewise you can't attack women and expect them to agree with you. That's all my post was about, I was referring to the very last sentence of OP's post and was merely saying that if you are going to attack a group of people then that group of people won't want to understand you. Nothing more. If there's something in it I missed that led you to the conclusion that I was being insensitive I'd like to know specifically what it was because I did not want to be like that. All I wanted to do was understand because as you said, I never experienced it since I'm not a woman, but I did want to understand it. Is that so bad?

I deleted my post just after you replied to it because I didn't see the point in doing this anymore. There isn't ever going to be a conversation about this. Neither side wants to cooperate.

If you think I'm wrong about everything I said fair enough. Like I said in the first post, I put myself in front of the firing squad and got shot. Not sure what I expected. Why is asking to be able to understand the problem considered not being empathetic? I'm genuinely confused as to what I did wrong. I never said being a woman wasn't hard. I don't know where this conclusion is coming from and would like to know what I said that made you think that because that was not my intention.

If you said something else, then I'm sorry misunderstanding. You deleted your posts so I can't go back and reread them.

It's good that you're trying to understand the problem, but the thing is that the majority of men do understand the problem but they don't think it's valid. This thread is such an easy example of that. A woman explains her struggles, men instead of understanding make it personal, as if a woman having it hard suddenly invalidates their life experiences. Like aren't we all on this site for the same reason? Why is it suddenly so bad for her?

 

[Suicidebydeath]

"It feels like men just have a superiority complex that the world itself likes to stroke for them."
"I wish men could ever understand this concept, but no matter what they won't."

"Men are incredibly entitled and rude from my experience, and additionally far more violent. I've known lots of great men but even then they felt like their problems were simply 'worth more' than women or that women's problems weren't good enough"

I think the tone of the thread is undeniable, personally. I do not understand the argument "Why do men get upset when women generalize?", because that begs the question, "Why do women get upset when men generalize?"? I'm finding this disingenuous. We all know the answer. Why is that even a question?

FWIW I'm not picking a side here. I think the thread is a bit of a mess and regret being here.

 

[Meteora]

My female intuition (lol) tells me, the OP was venting. When we have strong feelings we tend to generalize (all of us). That's human, that's ok.
The best would be to let her vent and don't take it personally.

 

[dragonofenvy]

If you said something else, then I'm sorry misunderstanding. You deleted your posts so I can't go back and reread them.

It's good that you're trying to understand the problem, but the thing is that the majority of men do understand the problem but they don't think it's valid. This thread is such an easy example of that. A woman explains her struggles, men instead of understanding make it personal, as if a woman having it hard suddenly invalidates their life experiences. Like aren't we all on this site for the same reason? Why is it suddenly so bad for her?

I deleted just one post. The one you replied to. "I tried to be. Look how that worked out. I wanted to try to understand and got shot down. I think no gender understands the other's struggles and never will. This entire forum is a great example of why." is what I said in the event your quote disappears from me deleting it.

The first post I made was on the first page. And yeah I completely agree with you that comparisons shouldn't be drawn. I was trying to help men who don't understand by allowing someone to converse with a man about it while addressing OP's last point about "men never understanding". It failed, unfortunately. But not everything has to succeed.

I think it was better for me not to be involved. I should've recognized it was a vent and ignored the generalizations and shrugged it off as something I'll never fully understand since I'm not a woman. I thought maybe someone would like for men to understand women's problems. I think men want women to understand their's as well. Sadly, all this thread has done for me is realize that I shouldn't open myself to conversations on topics like this. It's a shame too because I think there are some people who would like a genuine conversation about it. Those are the people I was trying to appeal to. This only served to further the divide. And I'll be completely honest, it has affected my opinions. I'm taking a step back from this so I don't go down that hole before it's too late.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

My female intuition (lol) tells me, the OP was venting. When we have strong feelings we tend to generalize (all of us). That's human, that's ok.
The best would be to let her vent and don't take it personally.

Agreed on venting. My only question is, whether or not a similar thread would survive or whether the OP would be torn to shreds if it was the opposite gender. I know if it was a guy, I would personally look askance at them. My concern here is that some of the disconcerting parts of the OP seem to be backed up in some cases. I don't know, I don't think widening the gender divide is constructive. So I equally dislike such posts from either gender. I think it's possible to vent without making it too inflammatory or generalize too much, there needs to be a line drawn somewhere.

 

[DreamEnd]

This thread is such an easy example of that. A woman explains her struggles, men instead of understanding make it personal, as if a woman having it hard suddenly invalidates their life experiences. Like aren't we all on this site for the same reason? Why is it suddenly so bad for her?

Substitute the word man for woman in everything she said and the reaction would be 1000x worse including people calling op an incel. Obviously this is a vent, but when you paint the whole group of people like that you can't expect to have a 100% positive outcome. What if it wasn't gender but race?

 

[WhatPowerIs]

I know if it was a guy, I would personally look askance at them.

Why?

 

[Oliver]

I think she said "being a woman is unfair" and that s just true in many ways......
Where did you read "all men are bastards"?
And besides, it is her experience and opinion. Why does it piss men ( you) off? I dont get it really.

I mean she kinda blamed men for everything. Furthermore, she has a pretty provocative sub-caption describing how men are pretty much the root of all evil. I just don't get it. Seems like she has some personal issues or maybe has had some bad experiences with men, but that doesn't justify her putting all men in same box. Sorry, but that's just dumb.

 

[Meteora]

I agree @Suicidebydeath , it could be more differentiated.
Hm. I don't think I'd even read such a thread of a male, to be honest.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Why?

I meant if it was a guy posting "all women blah blah". Because simply I hate the gender divide, and I think fighting with and blaming each other as the cause of all problems is wrong. By look askance, I meant that I would definitely disapprove of them.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

I meant if it was a guy posting "all women blah blah". Because simply I hate the gender divide, and I think fighting with and blaming each other as the cause of all problems is wrong. By look askance, I meant that I would definitely disapprove of them.

If it was a man posting about male issues and male issues exclusively without bringing up women, would you be okay with it? They wouldn't be bringing up a gender divide then, right?

 

[Suicidebydeath]

If it was a man posting about male issues and male issues exclusively without bringing up women, would you be okay with it? They wouldn't be bringing up a gender divide then, right?

Why is this a question? Anyway of course, and mentioning either gender is fine too, as long as they are respectful about it. I can empathise with people that get lonely, or that don't have many friends of either gender.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

Why is this a question? Anyway of course, and mentioning either gender is fine too, as long as they are respectful about it. I can empathise with people that get lonely, or that don't have many friends of either gender.

Don't get upset. I asked because how would I know otherwise? I cant tell your tone.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

I'm not upset at all, it was just a completely unexpected turn for me. None of us are mind-readers and can follow every train of thought.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

I'm not upset at all, it was just a completely unexpected turn for me. None of us are mind-readers and can follow every train of thought.

ok

 

[woundedanimal]

I'm sorry but as a transgender man I definitely disagree. I thought that women had it bad until I came out and transitioned and then I realized that cisgender women in America literally get whatever they want and usually most of their problems are either self-created or created by other women. People still stand by the ethics of women and children first, holding doors open for ladies, making sure that women feel safe even if they don't have anything to be afraid of. I literally had the police stop me because a woman tried to claim that I raped her and they treated me like I was a rapist until they realized that I don't have a dick and that the woman lied and wasn't raped in the first place, she was just mad at a native American dude and I happen to be the only other native American dude in town. People have literally been murdered just because a woman has said that they feel uncomfortable. There have historically been cases of children who have been hung because they were accused of hitting on a white woman who was married. Women who commit sex crimes usually aren't charged, and female pedophiles are seen as desirable even whenever they're victims are terrified. Women who commit racism and terrorism are seen as just prizes for men with the same belief systems, to the point that whenever a girl I went to high school with stole Nancy pelosi's laptop Andrew Tate literally made a video saying that he would date her.

As someone who used to be a woman and isn't anymore I think it's so ridiculous whenever people say that being a woman is hard. The only thing hard is carrying pepper spray if you live in a bad City. Otherwise you guys are literally dealing with all of the same amounts of violence and bullshit as everyone else in this country, if not less. Statistically, men commit suicide more than women in America because they have access to less mental health care and less support (since we're all here we might as well acknowledge this). Men and women are just as equally likely to be sexually assaulted in America at this point, but men are less likely to be taken seriously and less likely to be allowed to report and are less likely to even acknowledge that what happened to them was an assault because if it happened from another man they're usually afraid to be seen as gay. Women in America commit more hate crimes than men at this point. There's a reason why we call people who are hateful just to be hateful "Karens", because women go out of their way to bother people who are just minding their own business more than men ever would. Women are more likely to gain custody of their children in a divorce even if they are less capable of taking care of their children than men. Women are less likely to be charged when accused with spousal or child abuse, despite the fact that it's been shown that the types of relationships with the most amount of domestic violence are women on women or lesbian relationships.

I really don't mean to sound like a jerk by pointing all of this out but I have literally seen both sides and I can't pretend that you're right. Women have it really good in this country to the point where they can commit literal felonies and get away with it. Especially if you're white and especially if you're straight.

 

[SexyIncél]

hey good on the counterattack but what the fuck do any of those other words mean like what the hell I would turn around and run if I saw you irl also ur user is literally called 'sexy incel' I couldn't give half of a cows shit of anything you say + male savior complex + CNC kink inherently stems from the patriarchy + L + man + ratio

That "male savior complex" — guys call it having a spine & balls. We should all grow some! :) But tempered with morality & empathy

"This vision of feminist masculinity was so fraught with contradictions, it was impossible to realize. No wonder then that men who cared, who were open to change, often just gave up, falling back on the patriarchal masculinity they found so problematic." — bell hooks

 

[my_sundown]

Tbh I think people within lgbtq+ (trans, nonbinary etc.) has it the hardest since there's so much taboo and judgement against their gender in general. Not saying us women doesn't have it hard, we certainly do. I'd honestly say that all genders has it hard tbh.

I struggle with this and feel so alone. Thank you for the mention. I also really appreciate and understand (as best I can) what woman endure

 

[Ulrich]

hey good on the counterattack but what the fuck do any of those other words mean like what the hell I would turn around and run if I saw you irl also ur user is literally called 'sexy incel' I couldn't give half of a cows shit of anything you say + male savior complex + CNC kink inherently stems from the patriarchy + L + man + ratio

I feel like I'm on twitter

 

[ChildrensITV]

The sexism that underlies every bit of our society (I'm American, for context, but I do believe this broadly applies to the rest of the world.) is choking. I feel like I can't got 5 seconds without some form of sexist concept and patriarchal injustice coming up. It feels like men just have a superiority complex that the world itself likes to stroke for them. It sucks so bad when I feel like I can't do things because of the gendered concept of it. Fuck. I wish men could ever understand this concept, but no matter what they won't.

You sound like you hate men but I bet you will still end up having your pick of men to date.

Hopefully, you are at least bisexual or bicurious and focus on being around women and dating them. There is no point entering into a relationship with a man if you're going to end up resenting him or your male offspring.

I don't think you are as man-hating as you make out. You certainly don't hate the men who provide power to your house or indeed built it. You don't hate the men who enforce the law. If a male is a rapist or something, it will be other men who will protect you from him. Or if a woman protects you from him, she will do it using something that a man built or designed, e.g. a gun. So we're good AND bad.

But your experiences are your own and if you hate men, you're free to. Or if you think all men are advantaged, then there is much I can do to convince you otherwise. Any statistic (e.g. number of homeless men) or biological datapoints (women have an ingroup preference, men have an outgroup preference, so we care more about and gravitate more towards women - "women and children first!") would just fall on deaf ears.

What is your opinion on trans-women?

Lastly, a lot of women who think like you might end up becoming nonbinary or trans-men. Was that ever a consideration for you?

 

[theboy]

Don't bother. Misandry is allowed on sasu. I also learned that the hard way. Now I am just amused by these threads. It is pure malice and ignorance to not be able to see the flaws of humanity as a whole and just blame any other group that you don't identify with for everything.

deep