Venting attemped ctb and now im blocked by one of my closest friends

[maidens]

today, literally 1-2 hours ago I tried to hang myself with a cable cord. like some other people would do, I said goodbye to all of my online friends with a picture of the noose (which, looking back I probably shouldn't have included) I only stood up and barely managed to untie it (I did it partially) because the pressure on my face was overwhelming.

once I calmed down, I went to say sorry to my friends, and I was blocked by one of the only people I've really been able to stand and not get tired while talking to for a while. I feel terrible, I'm not fully sure why they did but I can think of some possible reasons that are mostly my fault. I'm gonna miss them a lot and I feel so bad I definitely made them panic or something else negative I wish I wasn't so stupid I wish I didn't do that but it's my fault I only hope thwyll do well

god the way this is worded is so bad sorry I'm still not in a good headspace

 

[Abyssal]

Sounds like a fake friend. Whether you live or die it's better not to deal with them anymore for your own sake.

 

[maidens]

Sounds like a fake friend. Whether you live or die it's better not to deal with them anymore for your own sake.

I'm sure he wasn't, we talked every day all the time and he was always so sweet and caring towards me and I also know he's not that well mentally either so it wad probably something to do with that

 

[divinemistress36]

I'm sure he wasn't, we talked every day all the time and he was always so sweet and caring towards me and I also know he's not that well mentally either so it wad probably something to do with that

Hes probably just mad at you

 

[Abyssal]

I'm sure he wasn't, we talked every day all the time and he was always so sweet and caring towards me and I also know he's not that well mentally either so it wad probably something to do with that

You have any other contact with him? Give it a couple days and apologize and ask if he's alright.

 

[maidens]

You have any other contact with him? Give it a couple days and apologize and ask if he's alright.

I don't, we talked on discord without any shared servers or friends & I don't have his username on any other socials, I'll just wait it out and if we never talk again I'll suck it up

 

[F@#$]

Maybe it triggered him?

 

[maidens]

Maybe it triggered him?

I thought that was a possibility, but he did tell me he doesn't have any real triggers before so I wasn't sure

 

[lostinwoe]

today, literally 1-2 hours ago I tried to hang myself with a cable cord. like some other people would do, I said goodbye to all of my online friends with a picture of the noose (which, looking back I probably shouldn't have included) I only stood up and barely managed to untie it (I did it partially) because the pressure on my face was overwhelming.

once I calmed down, I went to say sorry to my friends, and I was blocked by one of the only people I've really been able to stand and not get tired while talking to for a while. I feel terrible, I'm not fully sure why they did but I can think of some possible reasons that are mostly my fault. I'm gonna miss them a lot and I feel so bad I definitely made them panic or something else negative I wish I wasn't so stupid I wish I didn't do that but it's my fault I only hope thwyll do well

god the way this is worded is so bad sorry I'm still not in a good headspace

yeah, I think the picture was too much

 

[maidens]

yeah, I think the picture was too much

yeah probably, I regret it so much I wish I could at least say sorry
thank you though

 

[lostinwoe]

yeah probably, I regret it so much I wish I could at least say sorry
thank you though

if you have a mutual friend, you can say sorry through them, other than that just give it time I don't think they will be mad for long

 

[maidens]

update, they added me again and I apologized & deleted the image but no response yet. thank you to everyone who replied, it was helpful