Are most suicide attempt survivors really glad they lived?

[SinisterKid]

A emphatic NO to the question posed by the OP.

After talking through things with a couples counsellor and my partner I said I would do my best to stay alive and I have. My partner found me, I will not put her through that again. But there has hardly been a day where I haven't wished for a different outcome. I am torn in two constantly by the guilt of that day and the constant desire to catch my bus. Its such a complex situation with so many variables. But the pro lifers are pretty clueless if they honestly believe that most survivors are happy with the outcomes. The people I did group therapy with tell a different story. But maybe it was too soon after the event?

 

[Bulletwbttrflywings]

Speaking for myself - No. I really need to write a newbie introductory post.

I've attempted to kill myself multiple times - first time at about 11 years old with the serious intent of not waking up. I've attempted suicide multiple times since then, some very recent (I'm over 40 now). Some came seriously close to succeeding.

I really wish I CTB a while ago and, if I absolutely knew I would not wake up AND the method was relatively quick and painless, I'd do it again. Unfortunately for me (but fortunately for my family), I haven't found that way yet.

What are others' experiences?

Tried taking all my meds when I had insurance and tried slitting my wrists with the underwire from my bra when I was inpatient, also tried partial hanging with a scarf with no luck. I also tried jumping out of a moving car on the highway in front of a semi and the driver stopped me. Don't recommend that...

Little to no planning was my issue. I know better now. No one knows my day... or method.

 

[Kjo]

From my experience and my thoughts:
I never regretted attempting, only regretted that it wasn't fatal.

I think there are a handful of people that truly didn't want to do what they did and are grateful for a second chance. Of course, they'll announce that loud and clear. More often than not, they are the ones who were only doing it for attention... So they'll gladly grab the attention post attempt too...

On the other hand, those that wish it didn't fail will keep this secret private, because they will most likely attempt again. They don't want to be locked up where they can't try again. So you wouldn't hear from them.

 

[andy69]

I regret I didn't try harder on the last attempt. I am going with better method next time. Probably around August.

 

[Suicidal4Ever]

I can see if someone that has a suicidal thought and attempt for the first time glad they lived. But for people that have been suicidal for a long time im sure they would be pissed and want to try again.

 

[RM5998]

Personally, I do not understand what the point of surveying suicide attempt survivors is since the group seems to be ungeneralizable to the general populace, or even to those who want to commit suicide. There seem to be too many factors that encourage responders to say that they prefer being alive, especially if the method used is an in-person interview. Can anyone link any studies they have seen on the topic? (I'm feeling lazy right now)

 

[Morphinekiss]

I'm actually grateful I survived. I got to go to some amazing places and meet some amazing people since then. Those people have gone and I'm obviously not in those places, but atleast they happened. I may be one of the few on here who is not actively seeking and waiting to ctb. I hate my life and know in the future that's how I'll choose to go, but for now I'm ok going day by day.

 

[Sitokirment]

I wake up bitter every time.

 

[Jessica5]

It's mostly confirmation bias. Surely some truly regret trying, but I can bet that just as many are just saying it because they fear being committed again and/or those who don't regret it don't get as much press.

You might regret trying suicide simply because you failed, and had bad consequences afterword. I mean, I'm sure that 100% of people who shoot their face off in a suicide attempt regret attempting suicide. That doesn't mean they're glad that they survived the attempt.

 

[Robbyna]

Personally I am extremely unhappy that my attempts failed. My first attempt was at 12 and I've attempted several times since then with most of them being recent. From my personal experience in group therapy I can only assume that there must be some bias in the statistics that state most survivors regret the attempt. I think the important question to ask is why do they regret it? Is it because they want to live, or because of the consequences of failure? I have severe scars from cutting my wrists and I have to cover my arms whenever I'm in public. This is something that fills me with regret but only because it didn't work and I'm still here to feel shame.

 

[TheFinalCountdown]

No, it's just that you don't get to hear from the ones that don't regret it

 

[Jynxer]

I cam

Pro-life people always talk about suicide survivors who are glad they lived. Including some people who have shot half their face off, become physically handicapped, etc.

Something tells me this is grossly exaggerated by pro-life people. The people who still wish they were dead probably won't admit it. And even if they do admit it, the pro-life media probably won't report what they say.

e

Pro-life people always talk about suicide survivors who are glad they lived. Including some people who have shot half their face off, become physically handicapped, etc.

Something tells me this is grossly exaggerated by pro-life people. The people who still wish they were dead probably won't admit it. And even if they do admit it, the pro-life media probably won't report what they say.

i have many attempts under my belt... the last one should have taken. I ended up in a coma for three days because I was found too soon. I don't regret it at all. In fact, I'm still angry that I didn't succeed ( 14 years ago) now, I'm afraid that when I try again, that I won't succeed, and end up a vegetable.

 

[Lady black]

I hate that I survived

 

[Darkhaven]

Only the ones who didn't have a solid reason to resort to suicide.

 

[Futility]

I think most people end up saying they regret having tried to suicide just to stay below the radar and getting to escape getting more damaged from further imprisonment/psychiatric coercion honestly.

While some people do genuinely regret their actions, especially if spontaneous, those who are rational about it, not so much.
I sense a bit if survivorship bias, as the dead can't give any input as to whether or not they regret their decisions, making regret a very easily manipulated statistic.

I know I have added to the statistics myself, I'll swear up and down I've regretted my decision to attempt in the past, I'll put on a smile because I know if I don't, here comes the happy cult whether I like it or not.

- It's so funny how they teach you about how important consent is about sex and hugs, but they conveniently ignore that about psychiatry. Hypocrisy.

 

[h0wd1rtygurlsST4Yc1n]

the last time i attempted was when i was a teen. i didn't know what i was doing. it wasn't enough to die. even had my hands on a gun one time and still didn't(i was 15) at a certian point i said no more mini attempts. i hoped i would get my hands on some bad dope and my mother would find me. nope. now every thing is on me. im kind of scared of being one of those people they don't find for weeks dead in their apartment. i did every idiotic thing to die as a teenager. then i went to college. im scared to leave school because i don't know whats next. hopefully better than what i think......people keep saying you have to love yourself if you want others to love you. its sad feeling like you can't get close to people because you know you are going to CTB one day.

 

[Misanthrope]

I don't know how you would measure 'most' or even what time frame you would apply. Everyone is variable at the end of the day so all you are left with is speculation. There are suicide survivors that go on to find fulfilment and are glad they survived. Will they stay that way though is anyone's guess? Then some don't and are still left in a state of unaddressed pain and resent surviving as nothing has changed or has now got worse. But that can also change if pain is meaningfully addressed. Sadly we don't live in a society that looks at the sources of pain and instead makes it out to be down solely to the individual.

Those news stories about people being happy to be alive are not much different to puff pieces about a big-eyed brown puppy safely having its head pulled out from being stuck in a drain pipe. I am pretty doubtful it is an orchestrated effort at pro-life propaganda. It is just a story you go Awww about and don't think much beyond it. Awww stories generate ad revenue. As do scantily clad women, shocking violence and implied things to hate. None of that is a good measure of reality though. Since you can't measure 'most' to a reasonable evidence-based standard and people change views on things all the time. The people who do recover are unlikely to be on this site, so answers here will be weighted one way. Seems like a hard question to answer meaningfully, too many variables.

 

[Readytogo227]

I hate that I was discovered in time. I wish I would have planned better.

 

[oopswronglife]

I don't think there is any reliable data on this. Selection bias accounts for the trope that all surivors are glad. Same here but opposite since people who are glad and want to live wouldn't come here.

I read an article saying 1 in 25 who attempt will repeat it and the window of three months to a year after the initial attempt is the highest risk. Of course that doesn't say how many of those other 24 are "glad"...just about who tries again.

 

[LifeOver]

If you failed a suicide attempt and were asked if you were happy by authorities, anyone with a brain will say yes to prevent being put in a psych ward or suicide watch.

That said, there are people who are truly glad to survive: they never intended to die in the first place and only wanted to seek attention.

 

[thrwaway99]

The media doesn't report negative feelings about surviving a suicide attempt.

 

[Jessica5]

I often see one study cited on how almost everybody who was "stopped" from jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge never went on to commit suicide. Somehow nobody realizes that most of these people were never actually considering a jump off Golden Gate, but were just running around threatening a jump in order to gain attention.

 

[dysphoria]

I'd love to know that too!

Statistics regarding suicide are manipulated, even getting it as a cause of death has to be proven beyond the shadow of a doubt and beyond. Nobody's going to want to deliver bad news like 'Man who claimed he was glad he survives suicide attempt.... commits suicide'

Speaking just for myself, this is exactly what happened after I emerged from the coma. Everyone had already read and re-read my suicide note and knew my thought process. I spent some time in a mental hospital, just sitting around next to criminals, schizophrenics and people who have lost control of their bowels. I had to manufacture an epiphany even if I didn't really believe it myself, to get out of there. It's been a while and I've not attempted since, but mostly out of a heightened survival instinct. Every external and internal factor has either stayed the same or got worse. I'm now completely alone in dealing with this and don't see any realistic route out.

 

[Blackjack]

I am unequivocally NOT glad I survived.

 

[stellabelle]

No, not really. Sometimes things are beautiful and you're glad to be there for them. But it's not something you would've known about at the time of passing. So while you are in the present there to enjoy the moment, it's an experience that you didn't know you'd be happy about and there is no loss there.

In times of sadness and pain, you want out or wish you got out when you tried. You regret going on. You wish that you could flick off the light switch powering your existence. You ponder the idea of trying again but with great concern due to past experience. You wonder if you can delay it and just hold on for a little bit longer. You take a fresh breath of air when you realize you could go next month, next week, tomorrow, or even a few years down the road. You ask what the rush is even in times of turmoil and remember that it isn't that far away from you at the same time.


Sometimes even when you are "happy" or "stable" you think about how you've done it, experienced it, had a decent run for a little while, and might just be ready to close the book or "check out" of life. You think you have it all figured out, you're sick of it, you don't know how the future looks or how bad it could be, and think about going in a time that is not painful or torturous but when you are okay with it and okay with everything. Some might wonder why you'd want to close your eyes and never open them in a time of positive things but I think the idea of nothing having an opportunity to go wrong again, being content and in a positive mind frame is a better way to spend your last days than to be distraught, miserable, and upset in the days leading up to a departure.

I ponder this shit all the time. Will I wake up again, is there something there, does my energy go on in some other form? Or am I just a bug on the windshield in the galaxy, waiting to be wiped off from existence entirely? Will I be with others in death or will I just be suspended in an eternal sleep? Who knows. It's all really weird to deal with.

 

[Tortured_empath]

I think it's somewhere in the middle. Rember that this forum has some comfirmation bias too. I've met some members here that failed/aborted and were actually glad they did so. Their problems weren't magically solved, but I guess they just got a wake up call.

 

[k3v3r]

I can't talk for other people, but i can tell you IM NOT

 

[justanotherday]

I can see if someone that has a suicidal thought and attempt for the first time glad they lived. But for people that have been suicidal for a long time im sure they would be pissed and want to try again.

That is how I feel... I am angry that my attempt failed. I want to ctb now more than ever.

 

[Quinlor]

Just kill me and shut up...

 

[sammii]

I've tried to ctb a few times and I wasn't glad I survived any of those times, I'm just terrible at everything apparently even suicide