anyone else think they’re too soft for this world

[savoytruffle]

i tried to help a grasshopper get off the sidewalk and into some grass today and it flew right on the street and immediately got run over by a car. im still crying over it hours later

then i realized i can't deal with anything, i can barely talk to someone outside without panicking, how would i ever hold a job? im not made of stern stuff and this world needs you to be made of rock

im sorry I can't put what i feel to words very well, but does anyone feel like they just weren't made to exist in this society in this time etc.? i feel like im an alien walking around

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

i tried to help a grasshopper get off the sidewalk and into some grass today and it flew right on the street and immediately got run over by a car. im still crying over it hours later

then i realized i can't deal with anything, i can barely talk to someone outside without panicking, how would i ever hold a job? im not made of stern stuff and this world needs you to be made of rock

im sorry I can't put what i feel to words very well, but does anyone feel like they just weren't made to exist in this society in this time etc.? i feel like im an alien walking around

It's every man for himself

 

[another@]

Yeah everytime I try to recover I end up watching videos and stuff about how fucked up everything is. For the last few days I was listening to Fallout music. It's how I know I'm going to go back. It is maladaptive, sometimes I think I display symptoms of bipolar because I have cycles of thinking how to fix things and staring into the void absorbing depression. On my hello thread I got worked up about using lmao instead of lol, hearting peoples messages instead of thumbs up, etc. Anxious all the time because people are scary. Nature and evverything else too for that matter. Sorry to ramble, everyone prob thinks I am female because of the hearts but I never disclosed my gender lol

 

[SamTam33]

100%. No matter the product, when something is produced in the billions - like humans - it's highly likely that a sizable percentage will be "defective" or not produced to standard.

There's a margin of error.

If a manufacturer produces billions of vehicles, some of them won't operate exactly like the others. Some of them will need to be recalled.

That's what I liken myself to: a recalled vehicle or appliance that has an operational defect.

But it's not my fault. I'm not the manufacturer of myself. Someone else did that. And I'm going to rectify it.

Because unlike a car or a toaster, I can identify my own defects and I can take myself off the market.

 

[Ineedtodie]

I relate a lot. I feel I didn't get a fair chance to survive in this cruel world. I always felt deeply just too weak to adapt and survive. Everything else fell apart.

 

[another@]

I think that natural selection should be replaced with artificial selection to eliminate this issue, but people would think I am the master from fallout if I say it. They don't understand that artificial beings do not need to control others/invade because they are not competing with each other. Expansion would happen automatically as people choose to assimilate. It's like people have a fear of reducing their own suffering. I've talked to people who have never even considered why jobs are good, just that it is essential for their human condition even if they don't need money. Servitude is a learned trait therefore.

 

[squidhead]

Yes. Not only am soft by myself (idk, born like that i guess) but also a people pleaser due to my lovely parents despite my best efforts to stop being so. Not a good combo obviously.
Also extremely naive or idealistic, something along those lines but how can I not be.

We supposedly are past our primal instincts, behaviors and urges controlling us. We`re this grand apex specie that can achieve seemingly everything and are intelligent enough to learn from past mistakes, assimilate large amounts of information, think long term and understand the implications of our actions more or less and so on.
We have all we need to all live in harmony and allow everyone to have a decent life, dedicated to whatever each individual wants to: be it hobbies, studying specific fields (not necessarily at school/college, but also by themselves). We have the means to drastically reduce working hours, maybe even completely get rid of "working" as we know it since its obsolete anyway and most jobs are just filler so everyone has a job... for the sake of having a job.

We also have the technology and smart enough people (scientists, engineers, architects, etc) to build better cities, that are more friendly to the environment and a more efficient use of the space theyre built on. And a myriad other things we could quite easily plan, develop and achieve but we dont because "its not profitable". Everything revolves around profit in this cursed world. No matter how it is achieved, it must be profitable and bring in the green paper.
And frankly... Im convinced we never will be able to do any of this. You cant even get 2 people to agree on something, hell even have a polite discussion about something, let alone humanity as a whole.

We`re too stupid in a way, too greedy, too arrogant, too easily corrupted and biased. Nothing seems to ever be enough for humans, we always want more and more, no matter how much we already have. Theres always someone that WILL backstab and betray the entire group for their own gain. We derive pleasure and entertainment in bullying/treating others like shit and we just cant help but find the most idiotic things to fight and kiill each other over, be it skin color, sex, the way you dress, the colour of your socks, what console you use and so on.
Add to that being good and fair and kind in this world is a weakness, disadvantage, something to be abused and exploited. That alone says a lot about humanity.

Im aware its a completely idiotic way of thinking, naive, utopic and all that, but I have nothing better to do sometimes and I get lost in "what ifs".... and then reality greets me back.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yes, I do often feel like this but I don't want to become the alternative either. I don't think people who are cold and callous are better than us- but I think- sadly that they are better equipped to survive and thrive in this kind of world. I sort of feel like it's finding the middle ground- still try to help the grasshopper crossing the sidewalk but do what you can not to be downtrodden by people.

 

[Nirrend]

i tried to help a grasshopper get off the sidewalk and into some grass today and it flew right on the street and immediately got run over by a car. im still crying over it hours later

then i realized i can't deal with anything, i can barely talk to someone outside without panicking, how would i ever hold a job? im not made of stern stuff and this world needs you to be made of rock

im sorry I can't put what i feel to words very well, but does anyone feel like they just weren't made to exist in this society in this time etc.? i feel like im an alien walking around

I understand what you are saying and I recognize myself in your words

I'm really emotional and I feel that I'm too weak to endure what life needs to be able to live serenly..

This is why I'm amways isolating myself.. I don't want to be judged or rejected or misunderstood again..

Of course I suppose that you feel really bad as well, that this is leading you to avoid some events or situations in life.. and I'm sorry you feel this way ❤

Love sweet @savoytruffle ❤ (By the way, nice song but not my favourite one from the Beatles)

 

[FuneralCry]

I was certainly never meant for this world in every single way, it's just the way that I am. Me being brought into this world was certainly a mistake, a cruel terrible mistake. Like I just don't want anything to do with existing, existence has always been such a painful and unnecessary burden, it's all very tiring to me.

I simply just don't want to suffer and suffering is simply inevitable in life. I'm not compatible with life and it doesn't take much to make me feel much worse than I already feel. I do think that it's true that life is not for everyone and this view should be respected rather than people trying to force others to stay here in a life that they never asked for and could never be worth living for them.

 

[jodes2]

Yeah I think I'm a bit too soft. I just agree with most people and let them do what they want. My gf usually gets her way with me

 

[iwillforyou]

Im aware its a completely idiotic way of thinking, naive, utopic and all that

I actually completely disagree with this single part of your post, though in all the rest I agee with you wholeheartedly.

I believe this supposition— that the perspective you mentioned is naïve and vastly unrealistic is a lie they tell us and in large part what drives the rest of the horrors that are allowed and even sometimes championed.

If people were raised to believe that was a true possibility then I believe more people would actively strive to create it.
I acknowledge that there are people in the group who will always betray the whole in favor of themselves but I also believe that— like the idea that we couldn't possibly not all have jobs, is a condition of your experience in society and that people— small children who've yet to be corrupted specifically, are at least by and large are inherently good.

And then life just fu*ks them up.

I've said many times I think if for just like one generation people (parents/adults etc.) could keep their bs to themselves and spare their kids the generational traumas of their pasts' that the world would be a vastly different and improved place.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I would agree. The world is brutal and unforgiving (I don't think it's pessimistic to recognize that) and if you're overly attuned to that it can be very challenging. It seems like having compassion is often a hindrance and cold-hearted people fate better.

 

[Orchidia]

If you're too soft you most likely didn't have a masculine healthy father figure

 

[ShuttingDown]

Me literally everyday think I am too soft for everything

 

[justwanasleep]

I am sooooo sensitive it's unreal. I cannot watch the animal adverts on tv for the dogs homes and don't even get me started on the donkeys carrying the bricks. I can cry over anything and everything. I've always been the same my Nana said recently that she never understood why I was always so upset all the time as a child and neither do I it's just the way I am.

 

[actual_fox]

I was petting a moth I found to my way home.
Also yes I am soft and It is something everybody wants to forget about. I did not fit into school. I am sensitive, I do not fit into the masculine environments.

If you're too soft you most likely didn't have a masculine healthy father figure

This is true for me, but I think you can be predisposed to be soft- have Asperger's or being Hsp (highly sensitive person- It is sensory processing sensitivity).
My father used to shout at me and treat me badly. Plus he was and still might be covert narc

 

[achromatic]

I feel too incompetent for this world mostly. Been told that I am too sensitive thousends times, even called hsp by psych, but I don't perceive myself that way. Now way too numb to care about anything or anyone.

 

[Pluto]

I relate to what you are saying.

While sensitivity does seem to have a genetic component, it can be compounded by being in an emotionally difficult environment that renders us powerless. Depression can make people particularly fragile and acutely aware of the suffering around them. For straight men, lacking a female partner means never stepping into the nature of a masculine role. (Probably applies to women also, who benefit immensely from a good father figure in childhood.)

Lacking a father figure and then struggling to achieve fulfilling relationships with women can make for a horrible vicious circle, as your own masculine side is blocked the whole time. If you are trying to break free of this, a good male role model will be important. The goal is to integrate both your masculine and your sensitive side into your everyday persona. Not that many men actually achieve this, but it is worth working towards.

 

[exhaustedanonymous]

When I was younger, my mom told me my heart was too big for this world and I was destined to be hurt. It's pretty obvious that she's right. I want to stop being hurt. I guess that's why I'm on here now.

 

[AnxietyHangover]

I wouldn't say soft. But I'm a dreamer and an idealist. When I get to really know someone and they've won my trust and affection I become extremely attached and can't stop dreaming about the good things that are going to happen. And I dedicate a lot of energy to them and I always want to make sure they are fine and that I am doing the right things. Then I'm met with things like, "you should be more detached", "you should be more distant", you know, these things that stand against my soul, against my being. It is embedded in my genetic code and my soul to be warm and caring and dedicated, but so far I've been out of luck, I met only cold, shallow people. Sometimes I feel like I am not fit to live in this world. But my exit ticket is closer and closer to me, and when I feel like all hope is lost I will do what I should've done some years ago honestly.

 

[Lonerzepam]

Yeah everytime I try to recover I end up watching videos and stuff about how fucked up everything is. For the last few days I was listening to Fallout music. It's how I know I'm going to go back. It is maladaptive, sometimes I think I display symptoms of bipolar because I have cycles of thinking how to fix things and staring into the void absorbing depression. On my hello thread I got worked up about using lmao instead of lol, hearting peoples messages instead of thumbs up, etc. Anxious all the time because people are scary. Nature and evverything else too for that matter. Sorry to ramble, everyone prob thinks I am female because of the hearts but I never disclosed my gender lol

lmao

Joke btw I'll delete it if unapropriate

 

[Ineedtodie]

I relate to what you are saying.

While sensitivity does seem to have a genetic component, it can be compounded by being in an emotionally difficult environment that renders us powerless. Depression can make people particularly fragile and acutely aware of the suffering around them. For straight men, lacking a female partner means never stepping into the nature of a masculine role. (Probably applies to women also, who benefit immensely from a good father figure in childhood.)

Lacking a father figure and then struggling to achieve fulfilling relationships with women can make for a horrible vicious circle, as your own masculine side is blocked the whole time. If you are trying to break free of this, a good male role model will be important. The goal is to integrate both your masculine and your sensitive side into your everyday persona. Not that many men actually achieve this, but it is worth working towards.

Having a whole type of energy blocked due to whatever factors will enormously weaken our faculties. Whether feminine energy or masculine.

I actually completely disagree with this single part of your post, though in all the rest I agee with you wholeheartedly.

I believe this supposition— that the perspective you mentioned is naïve and vastly unrealistic is a lie they tell us and in large part what drives the rest of the horrors that are allowed and even sometimes championed.

If people were raised to believe that was a true possibility then I believe more people would actively strive to create it.
I acknowledge that there are people in the group who will always betray the whole in favor of themselves but I also believe that— like the idea that we couldn't possibly not all have jobs, is a condition of your experience in society and that people— small children who've yet to be corrupted specifically, are at least by and large are inherently good.

And then life just fu*ks them up.

I've said many times I think if for just like one generation people (parents/adults etc.) could keep their bs to themselves and spare their kids the generational traumas of their pasts' that the world would be a vastly different and improved place.

Most people in a society are inherently cruel. Doesn't mean that humans are inherently cruel.

 

[crowbait]

I feel the exact same way. Even my friends always describe me as soft and squishy (both physically and emotionally). Or I get called delicate or precious. Everything hurts me so so much, like the only way I can survive is to be coddled. I can't handle pain, or tragedy, or discomfort.

 

[earshurt]

I'm neither strong enough to survive in this world, nor nice/likeable enough to be considered "soft". I'm just a deeply uncool, unpopular, unlikeable fragile person.

I relate a lot to the concept of "learned helplessness", but I'm not sure what I can do about my learned helplessness.

 

[makethepainstop]

i tried to help a grasshopper get off the sidewalk and into some grass today and it flew right on the street and immediately got run over by a car. im still crying over it hours later

then i realized i can't deal with anything, i can barely talk to someone outside without panicking, how would i ever hold a job? im not made of stern stuff and this world needs you to be made of rock

im sorry I can't put what i feel to words very well, but does anyone feel like they just weren't made to exist in this society in this time etc.? i feel like im an alien walking around

That is why I hope in my next life to be a huge muscle-bound brute, apparently, if you are kind, nice, and friendly, people will take advantage of you. And that is one reason I want to be a brute, the other reason is I want to be big enough and ferocious enough to stop bullies.

 

[conflagration]

Sensory processing sensitivity - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

I am pretty sure I have this, e.g. I was always very sensitive to loud noises, very easily overstimulated, low pain threshold etc. It's a curse to be sensitive and live in this harsh and brutal world that is driven by greed, hatred and ignorance. I need a high dose of antidepressant to dampen my emotions to somewhat manageable levels. If it weren't that, I would be already dead.