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DreamEnd

Enlightened
Aug 4, 2022
1,892
Anybody planning to ctb this month?
 
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Timetoleave1

Member
Jan 4, 2023
23
Yes.
 
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spinningship

Student
Dec 20, 2022
166
50/50 depends how college return goes
 
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peacetime

Student
Dec 27, 2022
114
Yes, my SN from IC is coming next week most likely. It's going to go through customs though and I have no idea if it will pass through? I live in Finland.
I've got other SN coming from inside of Europe, but the source is less trustworthy. That should arrive next week as well I guess.

If I had SN today this would be my last day. I don't know what the fuck I will do between here and then. I guess I will still seek out random shit to do "maybe I will change my mind"... I won't. I don't think I will any way. I've wanted to die from ever since I was around 12, and my life is objectively ruined by my mental illness at this point, and there's literally no reason to think I won't just fuck things up again and again. I don't desire anything in life either, except "food pleasure". So eating like a pig for 50 years is what I could look towards, nothing else. No achievements I seek out.
 
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my-end

Leaving not grieving
Dec 19, 2022
156
Idk why I haven't gone yet, little details and concerns for others. I have the means, SI was a problem, likely still is. I'd like to go this month, next week even. Every time I put myself (in my mind) in THAT place of attempting, I have a burst of anxiety and I can feel the ball of energy in my chest then it radiates to my abdomen. The longer I go, the less anxious I've been.
I had an attempt nearly a year ago before I started researching; I tried electrocution. 120V isn't enough to stop the heart fast enough before the pain kicks in. I had no anxiety then.
 
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Sadgirldaisy

Student
Dec 26, 2022
112
I'm between a couple weeks from now or a year from now. Just deciding if I'm going to sign a lease if I can hold on for another year. I'm leaning towards January though.
 
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Fulminare

Fulminare

Read Thomas Szasz!
Feb 20, 2022
227
Yeah, I'll be going this month. Somewhat depends on the quality of the SN I'll receive soon, but my hopes are up.
 
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ThatStateOfMind

Enlightened
Nov 13, 2021
1,501
I'm debating currently, I don't have anything planned so if I did, it would be sporadic, I suppose I'll wait and see. Likely just going to keep lurking here, it's nice to be around like-minded people who don't judge.
 
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FallFadesIntoWinter

Member
Apr 25, 2022
75
Yep, me too (in the next couple of weeks).

I have my SN now, just waiting for my dad to come back from his vacation (after Jan. 14th) to do it because I don't want him to cancel his plans on account of me.

I won't lie though, there is a feeling of relief combined with being scared and wondering if I did try everything to prevent this from happening too.
 
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WorthlessTrash

WorthlessTrash

Worthless
Apr 19, 2022
2,430
Maybe, we'll see.
 
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almostoutofhere

almostoutofhere

Living in the past
Dec 27, 2022
163
Whenever I get my sn, so about 2 weeks from now
 
H

hiddenbpd

✌🏼
Oct 19, 2022
201
I really, really wanted to, but I've had to change my plans.
 
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stilhavinightmares

stilhavinightmares

Warlock
Oct 13, 2022
753
I've been planning for the 10th but I may do it more toward the end of the week, or the next week.
 
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readytosleep4eva

Member
Jan 7, 2023
29
yes by the end of the month, i am out
 
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Mia11

Member
Sep 22, 2022
30
I'll have to wait until spring, hopefully not too much longer. I need to wait until my so goes on a business trip so I'll be the one to find the SN package. Hope it won't be more than 3 months. I've been suicidal since 2017 and it got much worse in 2021. It won't get better, I know that with certainty. For those leaving in January, that saddens me, it really does but I so understand.
 

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