Anybody else wants to be comforted before ctb?

[AnonymousS]

You're free to believe whatever comforts you...

Sorry i meant to say one of them i knew personally.

 

[Shadowplay]

Yeah I want someone to hold me as I drift away from N. Hey maybe hire a hooker and not tell them? Joke lol.

 

[forgotten15]

It has no point to me because there's nothing in this world that could bring me comfort at this point. I have accepted my situation. And when I decide it's time to ctb I will have to do it alone anyway, so comfort won't help no matter what.
I understand how you feel, it saddens me deeply when I think how I will die, but that's life, it was not meant for me.
I recently saw some videos on here with people who hanged themselves and they literally gave me chills. It broke my heart seeing those people die like that, alone and tormented. It is so unfair we are denied the right to die in a peaceful way. What a fucked up world.

 

[miserableforever]

It is awkward and very intimate, but It would help to be comforted before ctb.

It feels very harsh wanting to ctb and preparing to It. It feels very lonely and alienating to be walking around a home depo with a rope and looking for something to stand on. (That is how I discovered real meaning of "kick the bucket"), and It is very lonely to attempt and look at the rope and fear of shame that comes when you decide not to ctb. It is very frustrating experience even to stand there thinking about attempting. The flood of emotions, tears, guilt, racing mind.

I wish for the whole process to be as easy as starting life. Sex is so easy when you get to it. Why couldn't we make suicide easy.
I saw thread of user Goat when he ctb and It broke my heart. He used partial, in his house, having comfortable surroundings and watching his favorite movie. I know his life turned badly, but he tried to comfort himself before death. I would like to think that after death, his soul watched the movie till the end and than departed into eternal rest that it deserved.

That is the reason I want to make goodbye thread. So I do not feel alone. Being alone in the forest with rope is not pleasant, but living as me and in my head is even worse.
I wish all of the people who want to ctb could find just a bit of comfort in something. Something that would make it less anxious and stressful.

I don't want to be alone either. It's scary and sad. Our lives are supposed to be meaningful and valuable in a way. I'm not sure when I'm going to be ready. I know I want to ctb, but so far my SI has been ruining it. Tonight is a bad night again. My family picks on me for the dumbest reasons. I never did anything bad in this life and yet everyone treats me like garbage. It's heartbreaking but I can't continue like this forever. My anxiety makes being alive impossible. I love your posts. You seem to be a sincere and well spoken person. I wish I had friends like that irl.

 

[ChaseBees]

I'll be making a goodbye thread too. I completely understand and relate

 

[Crazy4u]

I agree with hotelbeneathground

If someone comforts me I know I will back out. That is why my plan is to find a forest or an isolated national park

 

[fox_wannabe]

I don't want to be alone either. It's scary and sad. Our lives are supposed to be meaningful and valuable in a way. I'm not sure when I'm going to be ready. I know I want to ctb, but so far my SI has been ruining it. Tonight is a bad night again. My family picks on me for the dumbest reasons. I never did anything bad in this life and yet everyone treats me like garbage. It's heartbreaking but I can't continue like this forever. My anxiety makes being alive impossible. I love your posts. You seem to be a sincere and well spoken person. I wish I had friends like that irl.

Thank you.
I think we have been lied about what life actually is and what we are. I am sorry about your family, people who did nothing wrong are often treated worst here. I was shy and quiet kid and was bullied badly. If I were louder, more assertive and dominant, and taller. I would be better off. I wish you to find friends like that.