Any self-hating gays on here?

[summers]

@Pony you have to admit, this is kind of fun... Like explaining gravity to a chimp.

 

[Frauw]

well exactly. However the dude was saying that being submissive is not gay. Which uhhhh it basically is or is leading to it.

 

[bobjohn420911]

how can having sex with a woman as a man be gay

if she is the dominant one it is... if it is mutual it isnt.

 

[Pony]

if she is the dominant one it is... if it is mutual it isnt.

you're a dumbass

 

[bobjohn420911]

you're a dumbass

@Pony you have to admit, this is kind of fun... Like explaining gravity to a chimp.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/7c/Graham%27s_Hierarchy_of_Disagreement.svg/440px-Graham%27s_Hierarchy_of_Disagreement.svg.png

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b1/f1/1c/b1f11c51cdbb5d889180455acec0ac49.jpg

https://www.azquotes.com/picture-quotes/quote-insults-are-the-arguments-employed-by-those-who-are-in-the-wrong-jean-jacques-rousseau-25-26-33.jpg

 

[Pony]

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/7c/Graham%27s_Hierarchy_of_Disagreement.svg/440px-Graham%27s_Hierarchy_of_Disagreement.svg.png

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b1/f1/1c/b1f11c51cdbb5d889180455acec0ac49.jpg

https://www.azquotes.com/picture-quotes/quote-insults-are-the-arguments-employed-by-those-who-are-in-the-wrong-jean-jacques-rousseau-25-26-33.jpg

youve convinced me!! having sex with women is gay!!!! (this is also sarcasm)

 

[bobjohn420911]

youve convinced me!! having sex with women is gay!!!!

only if you are being submissive young padawan.

if you are being dominant or it is mutual then it is straight.

 

[Frauw]

The way people care so much about things that really don't matter is bewildering.

 

[ZardozOmega]

this thread has gone off the rails lol

 

[JipJopMop]

I wouldn't say being gay has fucked up my life, that was more down to my mental health and poor social skills but it has definitely created some issues for me.

For example I always wanted to have children but being gay makes it harder as I want biological children, also I have looked at co-parenting but I don't think my chances are good as mentally ill fucked up NEET.

Also my suicidal wishes are too strong to want children right now as I don't plan on sticking around long

Also there are lots of people who are judgemental towards gay and the discrimination sucks, I am already hated by society for being unemployed and a loser so being gay adds to the hate I get.

I was bullied all through school, partially for my sexuality.

Also as an adult lots of people are very hateful towards gay people so it sucks.

Also a lot of the time I feel like I am not biologically correct as a man is supposed to mate with a woman for biological purposes so the way I see it is being gay means the brain and body aren't right, it means I am broken and not as I should be.

I definitely think I have been fucked up since birth with my mental health, sexuality and poor social skills, I am basically a broken person that didn't come out right. If life was a toy factory, I would be a fucked up deformed toy that unfortunately wasn't taken off the conveyor belt before being packaged.

Also, I've only ever had one boyfriend, other than I just got used for sex or had guys not interested or when a guy is interested, they are usually some one I am not attracted to at all and just wanted to be friends.

 

[CatabolicSeed]

Being gay is one of the few joys in my life, actually. Not enough to make up for other miseries though.

 

[Worndown]

You should not hate yourselves. Our world has enough unhappy people to do that for you. Keep your chin up and shine!

 

[lofticries]

I find it sad how there are so many gay people who could be living happy lives right now if the world wasn't so closed minded. The people who say 'just stop being gay' need to be slapped. Imagine telling someone to basically become a eunuch or force themselves into a relationship they have no desire to be in.

 

[watchingthewheels]

I find it sad how there are so many gay people who could be living happy lives right now if the world wasn't so closed minded. The people who say 'just stop being gay' need to be slapped. Imagine telling someone to basically become a eunuch or force themselves into a relationship they have no desire to be in.

To be fair, I came out in the 90's, when it became more accepted. While I am grateful for that, I've seen too many homosexuals waste that opportunity, and ruin themselves with self-destructive hedonistic behavior; drugs, unprotected sex, etc. In many ways, we can be our own worst enemy, in that regards.

"With great power comes great responsibility."

 

[Outofhope]

Yes. I use to let people who aren't attractive at all do stuff to me as a form of abuse too.

 

[summers]

To be fair, I came out in the 90's, when it became more accepted. While I am grateful for that, I've seen too many homosexuals waste that opportunity, and ruin themselves with self-destructive hedonistic behavior; drugs, unprotected sex, etc. In many ways, we can be our own worst enemy, in that regards.

"With great power comes great responsibility."

I watched almost the entire Queer as Folk series when it was on Showtime. I have to say, the life Brian led was tempting, even to me as a straight guy. That show did promote safe sex heavily, but also glorified the gay fuckboy lifestyle with almost none of the real-life consequences.

 

[watchingthewheels]

I watched almost the entire Queer as Folk series when it was on Showtime. I have to say, the life Brian led was tempting, even to me as a straight guy. That show did promote safe sex heavily, but also glorified the gay fuckboy lifestyle with almost none of the real-life consequences.

I get that. (And yeah, it's not as if us homos have a monopoly on hedonism.) And I'd be lying if I didn't "taste the rainbow" at times. But when it goes too far, well, like you said, there are real-life consequences. And, whether "gay" or "straight", "the bill comes due" for both.

"God said, 'take what you want, and pay for it.'" -Old Spanish proverb

 

[Trans Magus]

I'm a trans lesbian. Meaning, most people just see me as a straight dude. It sucks for different, though related, reasons.

 

[JipJopMop]

only if you are being submissive young padawan.

if you are being dominant or it is mutual then it is straight.

This is just completely fake, I am gay and have never been submissive and I desire sex that is equal.

I can see why you are banned lol

 

[inthemoonblue]

I'm gay, and it's one of the very few things I actually like about myself.

 

[TriggerHappy]

I am a self hating gay dude, but not because of the gay part.

Why do you dislike being gay?

It's wierd I self-hate cos of my attitude to what i assign to being 'a successful human'; not really the queer part either - though i grew up in a very repressed society (racial / sexual etc) so had a lot of self-loathing growing up - this has become a fucked up self esteem (that i understand is all in my mind - but i bring it into relationships and kinda sabotage with my self destructive habits) very complicated - though i'm not homophobic i just don't believe heteroscumming is ok (love marriage babies etc isn't for me) i find a lot of gay friends are 'difficult and tricky and way too dramatic.. i've been described as quiet and deep (and caught in my thoughts) oh wow i just realised i described myself how they describe serial killers on crime channel!

 

[Hirokami]

I've dealt with hating myself for being bi for so long. I felt fucked up and greedy for just being attracted to multiple kinds of people. Not to mention, it's much harder to get dates as pretty much everyone assumes you're a horny and indecisive cheater who can't commit. Nowadays, I don't really think about my sexual orientation as I've accepted it as immutable. I still kind of wish I could be straight, though, at times due to the stigma. Ah well, just another target on my back, I guess.

 

[summers]

I've dealt with hating myself for being bi for so long. I felt fucked up and greedy for just being attracted to multiple kinds of people. Not to mention, it's much harder to get dates as pretty much everyone assumes you're a horny and indecisive cheater who can't commit. Nowadays, I don't really think about my sexual orientation as I've accepted it as immutable. I still kind of wish I could be straight, though, at times due to the stigma. Ah well, just another target on my back, I guess.

If you are in casual relationships, how are you cheating? People are stupid, and if you're bi, then enjoy the fact that you basically have a pool of hook-ups that's twice as large.

 

[LonelyNick]

Gay trans man here, in the middle of transitioning, got the HRT, got a couple surgery... Yet, I'm still alone, had to quit my job due to a transphobic manager, another surgery is coming up and I'm freaking out.

since I started to transition, lost my partner, my job, fiend, family...

I'll never have a real dick, which is why deep down I know I will CBT one day...

 

[Breakout92]

It's not because I'm LGBT, it's because of the horrible treatment I got from society for being LGBT.

I consider myself a gay male. But I hate that. When I was young I had a strong female gender identity but a lifetime of being told "no, that's wrong" by parents and teachers, the horrible impact of anti-lgbt religious brainwashing, and being bullied by my peers for being too faggy (this came especially from other girls) has killed off that part of myself. Now I'm almost 30 and have just been a walking shell of a person who pretends to just be a normal male so as not to bother people. There is no real me anymore.

I always wanted to be a teacher when I was growing up but ended up going into engineering, which I hate, to make my parents happy and because at the time they really didn't want to let lgbt people be primary or secondary school teachers. So that is another way that societal treatment has ruined my life.

For the brief time I tried transitioning I found myself even more socially ostracized, the guys that I dated treated me as a shameful secret, and even when I was able to make myself pass as a woman I couldn't live with the shame that I felt because of all the social conditioning while growing up. I also couldn't believe that people actually considered me a woman even when i "passed", I think it was just because people are supposed to be nice to trans people now and pretend to gender us correctly. And so I don't try anymore.

Every time I see anything related to trans people on the internet I'm reminded of how much people would hate me just for existing. I can't control any of this, I was born this way, but people would hate and shame me if I tried again to treat it with transition.

I'm envious of the people who ignored or broke the conditioning, but I haven't figured out how to. I've been in and out of therapy for years but nothing helps. Times have really changed and I'm happy for today's gay and trans kids for having such acceptance. But i missed it by a decade.

Even if I was cis and straight I'd still have a lot of physical health problems and probably need to CTB, but it's possible that i could live with my other problems if I at least were normal.