• Hey Guest,

    If you want to donate, we have a thread with updated donation options here at this link: About Donations

Wrennie

Wrennie

-
Dec 18, 2019
1,559
My goal is to become anorexic again so I'll come to feel slightly more comfortable with a mortician viewing my body after my death.
 
DivineMedicus

DivineMedicus

Vereor Nox
Sep 7, 2020
237
Idk, see how long I maintain my 3.9 GPA before CTBing? I'm still surprised I care really.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Ame
O

oblivion_seeker

Member
Sep 27, 2020
26
Find the motivation to clear out as much of my bedroom as I can do as not to leave it to my family (it's honestly so cluttered and gross is ridiculous) and probably have good sex one last time lol. I'd also try to write letters to those I'm leaving behind in an attempt to bring them so kind of comfort
Find the motivation to clear out as much of my bedroom as I can do as not to leave it to my family (it's honestly so cluttered and gross is ridiculous) and probably have good sex one last time lol. I'd also try to write letters to those I'm leaving behind in an attempt to bring them so kind of comfort
Oh and a proper session. Drugs, alcohol, etc....just a massive fucking party where there's no boundaries or limits and nothing matters anymore
 
P

Prathibha

Member
Oct 27, 2020
52
Yes I want to go to beach nd I don't smoke Nd drink before so I want to do those two...nd I'm Virgin too so I wanna kiss nd hug a guy at least one time before ctb...
 
GenesAndEnvironment

GenesAndEnvironment

Autistic loser
Jan 26, 2021
5,743
Nah, ready to go anytime. I have made some arbitrary plans since there is no pressure on me to use my climbing rope in the wood just yet. I don't really have goals, they are more like hopes. Hoping that there is someone worth dating that somehow likes me back, hoping that I can get into, through and out of an education that isn't garbage; hoping that my diet and exercise lifestyle will allow me to get ripped.

Sounds passive, I know. My attachment is becoming even lower with time, so this is the best I can do.
 
Last edited:
T

Tiredofhurting

Member
Feb 26, 2021
65
I am gonna save a decent amount of money so if and when I decide what I am gonna do they have something
 
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you
Jul 1, 2020
6,445
I want to climb a mountain before I die. But I haven't picked one yet.

Plus travelings a problem for me so I'll probably never get to.
 
  • Love
Reactions: WornOutLife
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,165
I want to climb a mountain before I die. But I haven't picked one yet.

Plus travelings a problem for me so I'll probably never get to.

Sounds nice!
I've always fantasized about climbing the Mount Everest but I guess I should start with normal mountains haha
 
Meretlein

Meretlein

Moderator
Feb 15, 2019
1,200
I used to want to learn Arabic (since I always loved the middle east and it's history) and wanted to skydive and scuba dive.

I don't want to do any of that stuff in my current situation. Now I want to finish writing my final notes to everyone and maybe do some drugs to put pleasure center in my brain to good use before I die.
 
Tkmiz_Tsukumizu

Tkmiz_Tsukumizu

Specialist
Feb 3, 2021
320
I would like to complete my apprenticeship to become an Electrician, meet my father whom I never met in my life yet. Possibly learn French and move to Canada. Though I know its a pipedream some of these things but its just in a way whats keeping me here I suppose.
 
lofticries

lofticries

obedear
Feb 27, 2021
1,469
Lose weight (25 pounds)(even though i'm not fat by any means), move out of my parents house, get my own apartment with a cat, visit new york and japan, and lose my virginity(possibly sleep around a bit), get a career/decent job just to see how much money I can save in this lifetime.

edit: if I do end up offing myself before my parents die I guess try to earn as much money so they can take care of themselves with. Specifically my mom since my dad already has huge savings. If I do it after they die then I'll probably give the money to a relative who's struggling even if I don't know him/her well.
 
Last edited:
Blue Rose

Blue Rose

Student
Feb 6, 2021
156
I would like to be good at Tetris first. Especially, I want to clear 40 lines under 50 sec in that game(It is called Sprint or Speed running).

And I would have enjoyed some text books of various foreign languages and educational books which I had looked up on some search engines, until I will master them all.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: jesse and Ame
Ame

Ame

あめ
Nov 1, 2019
322
I would have liked to give someone I love a final goodbye, because I never got the chance to do so, but I don't know if I can manage it if I am being realistic. I know that anything I have to offer will only fall on deaf ears, and that the entire gesture would really be for my own benefit (that doesn't appeal to me at all - I don't deserve that kind of comfort when I was the one who failed). There are some things that I ought to tie up before I leave and most of them are to help ease the burden on those left behind.
  • Complete my notes to my family and some friends.
  • Prepare notice for police to make it clear that I killed myself and that the remaining SN should be removed.
  • Get my affairs in order - for example: leaving a package with everything my parents need to close my accounts along with money for funeral costs.
  • Organize my belongings.
  • Complete and post that "Recovery Resource" project that I had abandoned a year ago (if I have the mental capacity to do so).
That's it really. It may not seem like much, but even this list is intimidating. I don't have much energy and will these days. Hopefully having my method in my hands will give me enough of a boost to push through.
 
Last edited:
W

WaitingForTheBusInTh

Student
Nov 18, 2020
174
Well if all goes as planned I've got 21 days left (planned date is 03/22/21). I'm waiting to hear back on two job offers but since I had to give my most recent employer as a reference I know I wont get either of them. Therefore, finish reading manga and watching anime I started, beat Tales of Vesperia, clean my house, make some goodbye videos and notes, and send out an email to my employer informing them that they are a primary reason for my ctb.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Ame and Mentalmick
MindFrog

MindFrog

:Professional Hypocrite:
Nov 19, 2020
723
Might sound a bit shallow, but I want to grow my hair properly. I have this weird curly mane that wasnt properly taken cared of. It looks damaged most of my life. I didnt know that curls have a different routine than straight hair.

I guess I just wanted to see how my hair should suppose to look like. Maybe a last ditch effort to improve something for myself?

I dont know..
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: stygal and Ame
wait.what

wait.what

no really, what?
Aug 14, 2020
978
All I can think of is that I feel like I owe it to my family to at least try the remaining treatment options out there. I feel like if I give the last 2 or 3 things a shot, and they don't work either (probably won't), the people who care about me won't hate me when I'm gone.

My mom let alcohol take her without appearing to put up much of a fight, and I'm mad about it to this day. (You never know what goes on inside someone else's head, but at the very least she never sought treatment.). I don't want to leave my survivors with resentments like that.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: stygal and Ame
stygal

stygal

low-wage worker
Oct 29, 2020
1,732
My goal is to become anorexic again so I'll come to feel slightly more comfortable with a mortician viewing my body after my death.
Thinking about that too...not even for vanity purposes anymore but just something - pain - I could cling onto.
I feel like I need something to direct my energy into and that makes me uncomfortable enough to not feel as empty. :(
 
L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,136
Drawing. I want to draw something. Unfortunately I don't know how long would it take. After drawing everything I have in mind, I'll leave this planet.
 
Wrennie

Wrennie

-
Dec 18, 2019
1,559
Thinking about that too...not even for vanity purposes anymore but just something - pain - I could cling onto.
I feel like I need something to direct my energy into and that makes me uncomfortable enough to not feel as empty. :(
It's addictive. I've already lost twenty pounds but I want to keep going... it currently serves as the sole motivator in my life (aside from death, of course).
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Ame and stygal
Downbylife

Downbylife

Member
Feb 27, 2021
62
I'd like to record the last album with my band and visit Japan once, but the second one is obviously impossible now (mostly because it's hard for me to get out of bed haha).
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Ame
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
18,911
It's hard to put it into words but there's definitely lots of little things I'd like to experience but most of them involve having someone to experience them with and I just don't have that yet. If I had more time I wish I could try out some classic games but I don't even have the energy for that sometimes.
 
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,165
It's hard to put it into words but there's definitely lots of little things I'd like to experience but most of them involve having someone to experience them with and I just don't have that yet. If I had more time I wish I could try out some classic games but I don't even have the energy for that sometimes.

I second your idea of trying out more classic games.
What's more, I had this crazy idea of completing all videogames out there starting from Atari! (there are some, such as Tetris, which are infinite so in that case I would just get the max score lol)
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Dr Iron Arc