passivethought121
Student
- Jun 11, 2023
- 314
I have been thinking about my social relations, as I usually do, and I realize I have a friend who is pro choice. Perhaps that is why it feels slightly easier being honest around them.
They know I want to die, probably more than any other person who I know in real life. And they never once told me to dont-do-it.
It is not that they do not care, or are just as suicidal. They said that they personally see it as cowardly, giving up, being solo'd, etc, but they also validate my pain.
They thank me for our friendship, and they say they're slowly adjusting to a future where I'm gone. They know I'm going to do it, and they know that there is no jargon that will convince me otherwise, especially since my choice is ever hardened by years of pain. They had a dream where I was suddenly gone, missing, and the reality struck them that I was gone forever.
They never told me they will miss me, knowing that it's commonly used to guilt people like me. But I know they will, for they are one of very few who acknowledge me as a real thing in their life. They are a good friend, but they are not good enough for me to change my mine. Nobody is, nobody will.
I know they'll be hurt, I just hope they won't be too hurt for too long, as they find peace in their own way.
They know I want to die, probably more than any other person who I know in real life. And they never once told me to dont-do-it.
It is not that they do not care, or are just as suicidal. They said that they personally see it as cowardly, giving up, being solo'd, etc, but they also validate my pain.
They thank me for our friendship, and they say they're slowly adjusting to a future where I'm gone. They know I'm going to do it, and they know that there is no jargon that will convince me otherwise, especially since my choice is ever hardened by years of pain. They had a dream where I was suddenly gone, missing, and the reality struck them that I was gone forever.
They never told me they will miss me, knowing that it's commonly used to guilt people like me. But I know they will, for they are one of very few who acknowledge me as a real thing in their life. They are a good friend, but they are not good enough for me to change my mine. Nobody is, nobody will.
I know they'll be hurt, I just hope they won't be too hurt for too long, as they find peace in their own way.
