Sixela Nosho
New Member
- Aug 13, 2023
- 4
ok wow uh, i have no idea where to begin,
so a good starting point wluld be when i was 10, i had just gotten discord with the help of my older sister, i met some people there, some i wish i didnt... i ended up getting into relationship after relationship after relationship because i loved the feeling of someone caring about me, loving me, and actually wanting to be around me
i so dearly craved the validation and love i had hardly ever gotten from my parents i took it to the extreme, i gone to people significantly older then me, just looking for that love that i so dearly craved.. and i would do anything to feel loved... whether that is between showing my body so they wouldnt leave me... to begging them just to love me... i got used hurt, and so much more due to my very own stupidity, it caused a deep depression due to being groomed, used, cheated on, and hurt among other things, i started sh at a young age, abiut 10 or 11 i had started, my first attempt was when i was 12 and i started drinking around that age to, i started smoking at 13 or so, among other things i started doing things way to soon for me, when i shouldn't have been doing such things, my idea of my body now is that im disgusting, used, and much worse things that i shouldnt say, for the last few monthes my mental health has been on a decline, things are so much harder to do now a days... even getting up to take a shower take so much out of me and is so exhausting to the point id rather just lie in my bed in my own sorrow,
due to my decline in mental health, i have started having thoughts, which i know its good for me but i cant hlo fantasizing my death and how i would die because for the longest time ive wanted to, yup thats it for now, reply with anything you want to or feel the need to i dont mind all that much, im just kinda here for some help/chitchat
so a good starting point wluld be when i was 10, i had just gotten discord with the help of my older sister, i met some people there, some i wish i didnt... i ended up getting into relationship after relationship after relationship because i loved the feeling of someone caring about me, loving me, and actually wanting to be around me
i so dearly craved the validation and love i had hardly ever gotten from my parents i took it to the extreme, i gone to people significantly older then me, just looking for that love that i so dearly craved.. and i would do anything to feel loved... whether that is between showing my body so they wouldnt leave me... to begging them just to love me... i got used hurt, and so much more due to my very own stupidity, it caused a deep depression due to being groomed, used, cheated on, and hurt among other things, i started sh at a young age, abiut 10 or 11 i had started, my first attempt was when i was 12 and i started drinking around that age to, i started smoking at 13 or so, among other things i started doing things way to soon for me, when i shouldn't have been doing such things, my idea of my body now is that im disgusting, used, and much worse things that i shouldnt say, for the last few monthes my mental health has been on a decline, things are so much harder to do now a days... even getting up to take a shower take so much out of me and is so exhausting to the point id rather just lie in my bed in my own sorrow,
due to my decline in mental health, i have started having thoughts, which i know its good for me but i cant hlo fantasizing my death and how i would die because for the longest time ive wanted to, yup thats it for now, reply with anything you want to or feel the need to i dont mind all that much, im just kinda here for some help/chitchat
