You're right. Even most abusive parents would probably say that they are, in some way or another, good people. It's called cognitive dissonance. Most parents simply don't want to realize that they're bad parents - and I know that first hand from my own parents, they were absolutely horrible. And there are so many signs that these young people that died, which made it into the news, didn't have such a romantic relationship to their parents as their parents claim to have had. For example, Joe said in this forum that he received "no family love", which is one of the reasons why he was ready to leave, according to his own words. This completely contradicts the story of his mother. Jackie knew about the struggles of her daughter for many years, Shawn even said on several occassions, according to the articles I've read that she doesn't want to live - repeatedly. That's a clear expression for suicide ideation but it doesn't seem that these remarks were taken seriously. If they were, I'm sure the parents would have been more careful with Shawns internet activity and what she received via mail. Furthermore, I also found a Youtube account of Jr, Kellys son, with a playlist that contains videos about abusive, narcissistic parents - oddly specific for someone who committed suicide. All of these signs hint to very difficult parent-children relationships behind closed doors. And maybe that's where we should put our focus on, parenting - not on a forum dedicated to struggles of autonomous, consenting adults. And it would make sense - happy people don't kill themselves. These young people were obviously struggling, probably felt alone in their suffering, didn't receive the support they needed and as a result, committed suicide. SS played no role in these development because ALL of them registered in the forum when they were already very confident about their intention to leave. They were sincerely suicidal. The decision was already made before the registered and most of these young people weren't active for a very long time in this forum. Joe and Shawn only wrote a few posts in this forum and immediately left. They didn't waste any time. So, considering all these factors, it's insane that these parents blame us. They were supposed to do the parenting. They were around their children 24/7. They should have picked up on these signs. Yet they blame us, they shift their responsibility which they had as parents, to this community which is outright offensive to me. These people aren't self-aware at all, they're in complete denial about the reality. They sincerely believe they aren't responsible for this outcome, yet somehow we are - more than them? Strangers on the internet, that's wild. So yeah, terrible parents have a very difficult time acknowledging that they're terrible. I'm not saying they were but there are strong hints in these cases that things weren't as perfect as these parents say and it's likely most of these young people I mentioned would have found death without SS, as tragic as it sounds.
You know, my own mother laughed into my face when I told her that I'm depressed. She didn't give a fuck about me, yet she sincerely believes she was probably a good parent. When I went through severe neglect when I was a young child. I didn't receive the appropriate love and care and it fucked me up, longterm. I'm certain my BPD developed as a result of the awful experiences I had as a child. BPD is linked to child abuse or neglect, so my parents are indirectly responsible for this very difficult mental health condition, which is making my life a nightmare. So my own parents are a major reason why I'm suffering so much today and they don't even know. I'm sure the parents that are so vocal about SS belong in a very similar category. And I think they are a very good example as to why anti-natalism should be a more known philosophy. It's all about harmful parents.