NSFW A poll for actively suicidal folks and sexual practices

[Freedombus'25]

This thread just from a human understanding/ sociological(?) Point of view was fascinating. Lots of dif points of view...

I haven't had any sexual encounters in like 5 yrs due to just... life? Trauma? Now im like very not into it / someone needs to take the time to learn about me, my trauma & care about it instead of just tryna jump into sexual shit bc I just get triggered.

I dunno of I'll ever have any sexual things again but I'd like to? Also I dunno if ima live long enough to even... "try" or get there? I dunno. Its both unimportant but would be a nice thing to... heal? Reclaim my body. Live beyond sexual trauma... alla dat



Yeah.

 

[R. A.]

like @Namelesa said depends on if you count sexting. if yes, i don't know, maybe ten-ish; if not, zero. i'm conventionally good-looking but increasingly disabled and i now feel pretty disgusting most of the time even though i don't outwardly appear too different. getting an infection could also kill me at this point (any kind, directly or indirectly via ctb) so anything casual is out and i despise the app culture anyway.
several of my conditions would impact my ability to be a hollywood-style lover at this point so i have no interest or capacity for anything beyond an intimate partner experience, which is almost certainly off the table indefinitely now (¬_¬")

idk such sentiments on this forum shock me.

this place was founded by incels apparently, so

 

[DontTouchMeImFamous]

That's like going up to a homeless person and saying... Houses are overrated. Stuff breaks and you have to have insurance and it costs money to fix things and there's property taxes and you have to mow your yard... you should be thankful to be living on the streets without all that responsibility of taking care of a home!

Or... telling someone starving... Most food is overrated. Processed foods are bad for you and it's hard to get quality produce. Junk food is the cheapest but it'll kill you faster than starving... so you're lucky because you can't get food poisoning and stay up all night vomiting when you have nothing to eat!

Being in bad relationships must suck... I imagine... but at least you had a chance, at least someone liked you at least a little bit and for a while and there were some good times in there or you wouldn't have been in the relationship at all. No offense, but people saying "relationships aren't all great" is so not on target for those of us who have never been in one at all.

Agreed

Having a roof over your head and access to food are basic human needs... sexual relationships and partnerships, not so much.

You can die without food and shelter, you cannot die from not having a sexual relationship with another human.

Not true at all. You probably don't understand why most of us are here. Communication and human bonding are essential human needs. It's in our DNA. That's how humans work. We wouldn't be humans if it wasn't for this.

Evolution is getting rid of those who can't socialize and that's why we are here.

Loneliness is a silent killer.

 

[kagebunshin]

The only person who has your back at the end of the day is you. Nobody knows you (and your body) better than you, yourself.

No shame in paying for sex... oldest profession in the world, after all.

Definitely my opinion, yes, and just chiming in because I can safely say based on my ample experience that having a partnered sexual encounter isn't the be all end all.

I see your point but it's not that adult virgins or lonely people want a quick fuck. It isn't even about pleasure. They wish to make love in the physical and spiritual sense, when you choose to be with someone who sees you, judges you, and chooses to be with you. They want to make themselves naked, body and soul, with someone who also bears all to them in an act of deep, mutual trust. It's about the freedom of vulnerability, and the ability to accept themselves through the eyes of a human being who accepts them. I don't think it's difficult to understand this and sympathise with it. We all want to be accepted and loved for who we are.

But of course if you view sex only as a quick fuck and nothing more, and that is all it means to you, then perhaps it is difficult to see it from other perspectives, I'm not sure about that.

 

[kcon1243]

Agreed

Not true at all. You probably don't understand why most of us are here. Communication and human bonding are essential human needs. It's in our DNA. That's how humans work. We wouldn't be humans if it wasn't for this.

Evolution is getting rid of those who can't socialize and that's why we are here.

Loneliness is a silent killer.

Communication and human bonding are definitely part of the human experience, but you dont need to fuck to have that. Sex doesnt cure loneliness, point blank.

If sex is all it takes to have connection, the world would be a much happier place and there would be far fewer suicides... but here we are, people who have connections and sex are still killing themselves every hour of every day.

If it was as simple as sex we wouldn't need drugs and hospitals... we could just open up government funded brothels and companionship centers, right? Do you think that would cure the suicide and loneliness epidemic? Personally, i dont.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

There was one and there will only ever this same person. Only thing is, I don't even know if I'll ever see this person again.

 

[Dejected 55]

Someone likes mountain climbing... that someone is in an accident that puts them in rehab for quite a while. When they are done with rehab, they can walk again but because of some permanent injuries to strength, grip, and general balance, this someone will never be able to climb a mountain again. Otherwise their life is mostly unchanged as they can move around freely and do not need anyone to help with with any daily tasks. This someone's job is not affected so their career is intact. They have a good family relationship and support.

But something they loved all their life... mountain climbing... has permanently been taken away, leaving only memories of times past and the painful memory of the accident that took this love away.

No one ever died by NOT mountain climbing. Mountain climbing is in no way a "need" for someone to live. But this person has an increasing sadness building within them, leading to depression, and ultimately a desire for suicide because they dearly miss something that was a huge part of most of their life that brought them great pleasure and comradery with fellow enthusiasts... something they can never ever enjoy again... mountain climbing.

I think most would agree this is a hypothetical that makes sense, no?

Would you tell this person that mountain climbing isn't "that great" and that people have in fact died climbing mountains? Would you try and diminish their loss because a lot of people never mountain climb at all and have full lives?

Can we just stop telling people that when they feel extreme loss and desire to no longer go on that their loss is "silly" and "isn't real" because they are giving something that is unnecessary "too much importance" in their lives?

Can we just stop that conversation?

I've never climbed a mountain... don't at all want to... don't even fully understand why anyone else every would... but if you came to me with your story, and this was your story... I would not try and diminish you or your loss by trying to convince you that you are wrong and your loss doesn't matter and shouldn't be as important as you make it.

 

[Alias Pluto]

Not even sure if I should say anything, probably just get judged. At the end of 2019 I had planned on taking SN and was drinking a lot and dating etc and had a one night stand with a girl and she got pregnant and it was out of my hands at that point. We threw away the SN. I don't know. I guess what Im saying is it made me reckless and lose sight of things that could make my life more stressful. I didn't think I'd be around anyways so I got careless one night.

 

[kagebunshin]

Someone likes mountain climbing... that someone is in an accident that puts them in rehab for quite a while. When they are done with rehab, they can walk again but because of some permanent injuries to strength, grip, and general balance, this someone will never be able to climb a mountain again. Otherwise their life is mostly unchanged as they can move around freely and do not need anyone to help with with any daily tasks. This someone's job is not affected so their career is intact. They have a good family relationship and support.

But something they loved all their life... mountain climbing... has permanently been taken away, leaving only memories of times past and the painful memory of the accident that took this love away.

No one ever died by NOT mountain climbing. Mountain climbing is in no way a "need" for someone to live. But this person has an increasing sadness building within them, leading to depression, and ultimately a desire for suicide because they dearly miss something that was a huge part of most of their life that brought them great pleasure and comradery with fellow enthusiasts... something they can never ever enjoy again... mountain climbing.

I think most would agree this is a hypothetical that makes sense, no?

Would you tell this person that mountain climbing isn't "that great" and that people have in fact died climbing mountains? Would you try and diminish their loss because a lot of people never mountain climb at all and have full lives?

Can we just stop telling people that when they feel extreme loss and desire to no longer go on that their loss is "silly" and "isn't real" because they are giving something that is unnecessary "too much importance" in their lives?

Can we just stop that conversation?

I've never climbed a mountain... don't at all want to... don't even fully understand why anyone else every would... but if you came to me with your story, and this was your story... I would not try and diminish you or your loss by trying to convince you that you are wrong and your loss doesn't matter and shouldn't be as important as you make it.

Especially if the person telling you that your misery over being unable to climb mountains is an avid mountain climber and is actively proselytising to you from the top of a mountain xD

 

[ConstantPain]

I hate sex. I never really enjoyed it and now that I have been expected to have it with my husband for so many years, I dislike it even more. The fluids gross me out, even kissing does. I don't think that's necessarily so uncommon for people who have been sexually assaulted either. It's been used as a weapon on us.

Relationships and sex are two very different things. I have a best friend who I love and feel supported by and there is zero physical contact between us. Conversely, being stuck in a bad marriage with an alcoholic, abusive partner is far more detrimental to my depression and having any desire to live. If I could be a hermit I think I would enjoy life a whole lot more.