PetrichorBirth
Student
- Mar 5, 2024
- 163
Everything is just as it is. Moving, changing. In a paradoxal way, the only thing that never changes, is the fact that everything always changes. Pretty trippy. The desire for something genuine and pure, good, consumes me. But i am surrounded by everything that i don't want. Or maybe i have become blind to the privilege that surrounds me, and i am just a never-content human soul. Nothing is ever enough, is it? Maybe it is dangerous to reach a point at which all is enough. When you reach that point, you might not anticipate change. You might want to stay in your situation, but change is what always happens, you are deluding yourself. It will change.
I believe that you cannot be truly happy at the expense of others unhappiness. But i am surrounded by the fruits of others unhappiness. Clothing that was made by struggling workers in poor countries, lithium batteries in my devices, everything that is accessible to me. Maybe it's a too cynical view of the world. Maybe these people enjoy working in mines, or sewing clothing for primark. I would need to do more research on that to know for sure... Of course it's a big topic nowadays, climate change and all, fairtrade, all of these things that seem to constantly require your attention. But it's all so far away, and there is so much happening at the same time, that you're being bombarded with information from every direction...
I want to return to my point about being happy at the expense of others unhappiness. I stole that quote from one of Tarkovskys movies, he makes cool movies.
I find myself thinking about it, and i notice that lions must be pretty happy about finding an animal to feast on, and the prey must be incredibly unhappy about it. If we even can apply such a concept of happiness to animals...
What does this mean? Is the quote wrong? I do not know. I do know though that i am afraid of pain and suffering. Maybe me using this quote is an attempt to project my fear of pain and suffering onto the entire world, as if saying : "You can't be happy if everything is based upon suffering!". But this is obviously wrong, because if there are happy people, they have been the product of sacrifices and pain that their parents and ancestors went through, which renders the entire quote false.
So, at this point, it seems to me that one of two things must be true :
1. There exist no happy people in this world. The reason for this is pain and suffering.
2. You CAN be happy at the expense of others unhappiness. If happiness is your goal, it makes sense to exploit and hurt other people.
Now, this is a pretty bleak outlook, none of these options sound good at all. If the first option is true, we are practically subjecting ourselves to a period of punishment during our entire life. The only thing that keeps us from ending it, is the fear of pain and suffering. Some people are able to block out all of the fruits of unhappiness that surround them, that they use in their daily lives. They are simply ignored, and no bad feelings arise out of that. Maybe these people are the closest to a state of happiness that you can get. They choose to not realize any pain. They choose to forego empathy.
In any case, our existence could be viewed as a "trap", that we have to experience until we physically can't.
If the second option is true, happy people do exist, and the happiest people are the ones who manage to exploit and hurt the most people. This would mean that sociopaths, narcissists, psychopaths and all kinds of people that one would usually try to avoid for their predatory behavior, are the ones who are living life "right". They are pushing out of the way whatever interferes with their plan, and have no issue about being the source of suffering for people. To return to my animal example, they are the lions that are quite happy about finding prey to feast on.
How do you navigate circumstances like that? Zoomed out, is it really just "eat or be eaten"? Is there anything beautiful that isn't just a natural trade of organic matter, or economic trade of money?
The realization that the world around us is cruel is a difficult one to cope with. It is such a common sense thing to say, but deeply thinking about it is something else entirely. I have turned to prayer, and i hope that my suffering will be brief and light before returning to peace.
Maybe there are just particular types of people, people that grew up in privilege, that are not able to quite come to terms with the natural suffering that encompasses everything. I think that i might be one of those people. I don't like hurting people. I don't like living my life with the knowledge that i am supporting the systems that encourage the suffering of people.
I could possibly deal with it by befriending the idea of suffering, and finally accepting it as the way of life.
I could integrate other peoples suffering into my process of finding happiness, and become just like the sociopaths and whatever else out there.
I could also just take initiative, show bravery, and end it prematurely, breaking past the walls of fearing pain just one last time.
I don't know what the future brings. Currently i'm more on the path of the first option, accepting suffering, with the third one also infiltrating a lot of my thought.
I believe that you cannot be truly happy at the expense of others unhappiness. But i am surrounded by the fruits of others unhappiness. Clothing that was made by struggling workers in poor countries, lithium batteries in my devices, everything that is accessible to me. Maybe it's a too cynical view of the world. Maybe these people enjoy working in mines, or sewing clothing for primark. I would need to do more research on that to know for sure... Of course it's a big topic nowadays, climate change and all, fairtrade, all of these things that seem to constantly require your attention. But it's all so far away, and there is so much happening at the same time, that you're being bombarded with information from every direction...
I want to return to my point about being happy at the expense of others unhappiness. I stole that quote from one of Tarkovskys movies, he makes cool movies.
I find myself thinking about it, and i notice that lions must be pretty happy about finding an animal to feast on, and the prey must be incredibly unhappy about it. If we even can apply such a concept of happiness to animals...
What does this mean? Is the quote wrong? I do not know. I do know though that i am afraid of pain and suffering. Maybe me using this quote is an attempt to project my fear of pain and suffering onto the entire world, as if saying : "You can't be happy if everything is based upon suffering!". But this is obviously wrong, because if there are happy people, they have been the product of sacrifices and pain that their parents and ancestors went through, which renders the entire quote false.
So, at this point, it seems to me that one of two things must be true :
1. There exist no happy people in this world. The reason for this is pain and suffering.
2. You CAN be happy at the expense of others unhappiness. If happiness is your goal, it makes sense to exploit and hurt other people.
Now, this is a pretty bleak outlook, none of these options sound good at all. If the first option is true, we are practically subjecting ourselves to a period of punishment during our entire life. The only thing that keeps us from ending it, is the fear of pain and suffering. Some people are able to block out all of the fruits of unhappiness that surround them, that they use in their daily lives. They are simply ignored, and no bad feelings arise out of that. Maybe these people are the closest to a state of happiness that you can get. They choose to not realize any pain. They choose to forego empathy.
In any case, our existence could be viewed as a "trap", that we have to experience until we physically can't.
If the second option is true, happy people do exist, and the happiest people are the ones who manage to exploit and hurt the most people. This would mean that sociopaths, narcissists, psychopaths and all kinds of people that one would usually try to avoid for their predatory behavior, are the ones who are living life "right". They are pushing out of the way whatever interferes with their plan, and have no issue about being the source of suffering for people. To return to my animal example, they are the lions that are quite happy about finding prey to feast on.
How do you navigate circumstances like that? Zoomed out, is it really just "eat or be eaten"? Is there anything beautiful that isn't just a natural trade of organic matter, or economic trade of money?
The realization that the world around us is cruel is a difficult one to cope with. It is such a common sense thing to say, but deeply thinking about it is something else entirely. I have turned to prayer, and i hope that my suffering will be brief and light before returning to peace.
Maybe there are just particular types of people, people that grew up in privilege, that are not able to quite come to terms with the natural suffering that encompasses everything. I think that i might be one of those people. I don't like hurting people. I don't like living my life with the knowledge that i am supporting the systems that encourage the suffering of people.
I could possibly deal with it by befriending the idea of suffering, and finally accepting it as the way of life.
I could integrate other peoples suffering into my process of finding happiness, and become just like the sociopaths and whatever else out there.
I could also just take initiative, show bravery, and end it prematurely, breaking past the walls of fearing pain just one last time.
I don't know what the future brings. Currently i'm more on the path of the first option, accepting suffering, with the third one also infiltrating a lot of my thought.
