A cry for help

[deep_end]

I've been crying for help for years now, both subtilty and not. now I think it's too late because my exit plan is already in motion.

Side note, can anyone help me pick out my firearm? Otherwise I'm just going to pick the first one i chose. I know nothing about firearms and the megathread was kinda just confusing for me. :) <3

 

[martyrdom]

It's never actually too late. If you don't genuinely want to die (or rather, if you do want to die but would PREFER to be helped), there's still time for that and there always will be. You will die anyway eventually, so if you're not absolutely sure, reach out for help in whatever way is available to you. This kind of decision is best taken, imo, when you really don't want help anymore.

 

[deep_end]

It's never actually too late. If you don't genuinely want to die (or rather, if you do want to die but would PREFER to be helped), there's still time for that and there always will be. You will die anyway eventually, so if you're not absolutely sure, reach out for help in whatever way is available to you. This kind of decision is best taken, imo, when you really don't want help anymore.

a lot of my depression was a massive cry for someone to help me through my pain, and recently I've switched to acceptance of the end. I wouldn't turn down more support and help from people but it's not something I'm calling out for like before.

 

[martyrdom]

a lot of my depression was a massive cry for someone to help me through my pain, and recently I've switched to acceptance of the end. I wouldn't turn down more support and help from people but it's not something I'm calling out for like before.

I can understand that, though I still believe that if any part of you still wants help, there's still time and it's not the right decision to do it just yet. Do you have anyone you can reach out to at all?

 

[deep_end]

I can understand that, though I still believe that if any part of you still wants help, there's still time and it's not the right decision to do it just yet. Do you have anyone you can reach out to at all?

0 friends, 0 family, 1 roommate that hasn't talked to me in 2 months. Unfortunately there's just 0 things I can really latch onto to make life seem worth fighting for. It's a discussion I've gone back and forth on for years (and a lot in the last 6 months) and I'm just accepting the fate now.

 

[martyrdom]

0 friends, 0 family, 1 roommate that hasn't talked to me in 2 months. Unfortunately there's just 0 things I can really latch onto to make life seem worth fighting for. It's a discussion I've gone back and forth on for years (and a lot in the last 6 months) and I'm just accepting the fate now.

I'd trade you my family if I could. I'd say give it a little more time, but I hope you find peace, whatever you choose to do.

 

[deep_end]

I'd trade you my family if I could. I'd say give it a little more time, but I hope you find peace, whatever you choose to do.

Sorry, but I don't think I can hold out any longer. Plan is already in motion and I'm shooting for the end by Sunday at the latest hopefully.

 

[paradox_panic]

I feel you, I have been in a similar boat. I just accepted that no one will help as fact. I hope you find peace.

 

[martyrdom]

Sorry, but I don't think I can hold out any longer. Plan is already in motion and I'm shooting for the end by Sunday at the latest hopefully.

No reason to apologize to me. I wish you the best, and good luck.

 

[madwoman]

Sending love. I also agree it's never too late. I'm sorry for your pain though. At the very least you could call a crisis line.

I can't offer advice besides if you really are going to and a firearm is your choice, I hope you research more bc messing up could make everything worse. My mom failed her first firearm attempt.

 

[deep_end]

Sending love. I also agree it's never too late. I'm sorry for your pain though. At the very least you could call a crisis line.

I can't offer advice besides if you really are going to and a firearm is your choice, I hope you research more bc messing up could make everything worse. My mom failed her first firearm attempt.

yeah I'm def going to be really careful with the firearm purchase. I know the megathread suggested a shotgun but god something about that just makes me uncomfortable and I think I NEED to go with a handgun. I know next to nothing about firearms too

 

[madwoman]

yeah I'm def going to be really careful with the firearm purchase. I know the megathread suggested a shotgun but god something about that just makes me uncomfortable and I think I NEED to go with a handgun. I know next to nothing about firearms too

A firearm is a pass for me for many reasons - violence of it and if it fails it would have severe consequences of a much worse life. Everyone has to decide what's right for them if they want to CTB. My choice is SN so I know more about that than other methods. But also still holding onto a sliver of hope and I won't do it until I'm sure and ready. There is no need to rush just bc some things are in motion but only you know what's best for you. But the people in this forum are here for you no matter what.

 

[deep_end]

A firearm is a pass for me for many reasons - violence of it and if it fails it would have severe consequences of a much worse life. Everyone has to decide what's right for them if they want to CTB. My choice is SN so I know more about that than other methods. But also still holding onto a sliver of hope and I won't do it until I'm sure and ready. There is no need to rush just bc some things are in motion but only you know what's best for you. But the people in this forum are here for you no matter what.

I appreciate the support. I legit hate the idea of firearms too but it's the only one I have current access too (besides jumping, but that's worse imo). Ideally I would be taking some poison but I haven't found anything that called to me that I can get NOW. I had SN years ago but my attempt fell through.