Marz
À PEU PRÈS
- Aug 3, 2018
- 170
Play music, watch a couple vids, text people I care about, drink a bit, lay down. Close my eyes and go.
Quinlor
The stranger
- Feb 21, 2019
- 1,058
a.n.kirillov
velle non discitur
- Nov 17, 2019
- 1,831
I'm a little scared about my cat eating me. I'd like to have him around at least though and he has a way out of the house, so I hope he'll spare me. But if not, then bon appetit I guess lol
Squiddy
Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
- Sep 4, 2019
- 5,903
Make a goodbye thread, listen to my favorite songs and smoke some weed
NitriteAnatomy
Lost. Alone. Trapped. Need escape.
- Nov 21, 2019
- 450
Wish I could smoke some weed, but I'm stuck with stupid alcohol because my state is too retarded to legalize. On top of, I have no source of getting some green. It does help, even if it wouldn't solve the underlying problems, it would be appreciated right about now.
I wouldn't lay in bed because of vomit reflux. Prefer sitting on my sofa and die there.
Astral316
Specialist
- Aug 26, 2019
- 332
Chill in my recliner and watch Road House on my computer until I pass out.
hhsp
Member
- Dec 7, 2019
- 61
Around 12 minutes
Great. I'm planning to listen to the Aranjuez Concert by Miles Davis
hhsp
Member
- Dec 7, 2019
- 61
I heard the heartbeat gets really fast and strong and probably feel sick and maybe throw up, right? I still have to read Stan's resource on it.
I hope more for a relaxed 12 minutes if I ever do this. I can not imagine it without extreme anxiety. I even get scared now thinking about it.
Relaxing music will help I guess. Also taking a bath and perhaps you can get a combo SN+Drowning
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Mr2005
Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
- Sep 25, 2018
- 3,622
12 minutes is too long. I've ordered some but I'd rather it was immediate. I know I'll regret it. It's not something I want to do it just has to be done
If you know you'll regret it then don't do it. But that's your decision. You have to be 100% sure or look for another faster method.
hhsp
Member
- Dec 7, 2019
- 61
i agree it should be immediate and the heart should just stop beating. I saw how my cat got a N injection right in the heart. The needle was scary but the death was so smooth, like she was just falling asleep. So peaceful, this is the death I wish for. And around me people i care for and i have cared for them. Peaceful not sad, soft music, warm comfortable bed, fresh breeze from the sea. Yeah I like to cease to be near the sea with trees and nature around me.
Healthy and happy, finally....finally happy, calm, confident and relaxed.
In about as many years I still have left.
I will start to go to AA meetings, a good friend of mine is AA member for about 40 years. I was never alcoholic but the 12 Step program is open to everybody my friend says. I have been to a couple of meetings and have to say I like the setup that nobody can interrupt you when you talk and that I have time to talk as much as I want. Plus there is a meeting almost every day in a metropolitan area. And it is basically free of charge.
It is after so many years really my last attempt, after more then 30 years of misery (and of course misery mixed with interesting experiences).
I really hope 2020 I can leave IF misery continues. I know here are people to support me if I choose to ctb with SN next year. I am so happy that people will help me and give me the choice, every human being deserves to have.
I have to leave my home country, here it will never work out, I am 100% sure about it. I have lived abroad before in NL and other countries.
I am glad there are people here to help me ctb if I need too.
I love life esp. nature, trees, birds....we will see what happens. I am glad I have a exit if I need it.
a.n.kirillov
velle non discitur
- Nov 17, 2019
- 1,831
@hhsp tell us how it went then! I thought about going to some 12 step meeting, maybe ACoA or Al-Anon just to get over my fear of vulnerability. I am a dry drunk and a lot of family members are narcs/ codependants/ alcoholics. I'm afraid the ideological nature of it will frustrate me though and also admitting to be powerless isn't something I feel comfortable doing.
Nem
Drs suck mega ass!
- Sep 3, 2018
- 1,489
mattwitt
# 978
- Jun 28, 2018
- 2,307
MsMaudlin
This is the fierce last stand of all I am
- Dec 8, 2019
- 875
I"m going to listen to some music, probably The Smiths. I wish that someone could be there to hold my hand as I passed x
chris8000
Experienced
- Dec 10, 2019
- 231
Probably listen to some classical music or something. Scene out of solyent green anyone? Good film if you haven't seen it, guy gets a peaceful death 
After drinking the SN, I'll clean everything, put it back to place unsuspectedly. i have to be quick.
In the final minutes, try not to think too much, try to sleep or lose consciousness asap. I won't make a thread.
In the final minutes, try not to think too much, try to sleep or lose consciousness asap. I won't make a thread.
APharmaDestroyedLife
Your RX drugs are likely your real problem
- Nov 4, 2019
- 305
Im not going to lie. I am going to cry from emotional pain and knowing this is what became of a life I fully wanted to live, then I am going to pray for to pass out quickly with no awareness of my body shutting down.
I think about how lonely and confused my dog will be when I close the door on him. I feel so bad leaving him behind, and confused, but I already have a great home for him, so that gives me some comfort.
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TearyEyedQueen
In the wrong timeline
- Nov 14, 2019
- 366
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