UglyDuck666
Member
- Nov 14, 2020
- 44
My face and disgusting body, sick relationship with my family (especially mother), loneliness, hopeless future (I'll probably be homeless soon) and situation at school.
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k75
L'appel du Vide
- Jun 27, 2019
- 2,546
Other
It's a combination of factors, and it's complicated. There isn't just one primary reason. Here are the top 3:
I have a cancer history, and I'm driving myself crazy waiting for the other shoe to drop. I'm apparently so afraid of dying, I'd rather just die already.
I lost the only future I ever really wanted, and I'm not able to accept that and make a new one. I want exactly what I lost, not something different.
One day, my brain just randomly decided I need to die, and I can't seem to convince myself otherwise. I have things to live for, but I am plagued with almost obsessive thoughts and urges to end myself. It's exhausting, and I'm sick of fighting it.
It's a combination of factors, and it's complicated. There isn't just one primary reason. Here are the top 3:
I have a cancer history, and I'm driving myself crazy waiting for the other shoe to drop. I'm apparently so afraid of dying, I'd rather just die already.
I lost the only future I ever really wanted, and I'm not able to accept that and make a new one. I want exactly what I lost, not something different.
One day, my brain just randomly decided I need to die, and I can't seem to convince myself otherwise. I have things to live for, but I am plagued with almost obsessive thoughts and urges to end myself. It's exhausting, and I'm sick of fighting it.
NodusTollens
☾
- Nov 17, 2020
- 989
I have multiple reasons, but pain seems to be my number one.
Abusive, narcisstic, mentally ill PIECE of SHIT BREEDERS that MUST HAVE NOT fucking met, fell in love, get married, and HAVE ME BEING BORN in this shitty planet full of RETARDED, DUMB, and RELIGIOUS meat suits! 
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LenkaX
Maybe there is a hope!
- Aug 14, 2020
- 366
There are several reasons for me to CTB, all very severe, but the most difficult for me is the social isolation and having no partner (and knowing that this will never change).
W’ren
Worthless
- Oct 28, 2020
- 559
It's honestly a lot of reasons, it's so hard to pick just one because they all play off of each other and are woven into each other as to make each other worse...
non-terminal pain/mental illness
plus a few things listed but i clicked other.-
non-terminal pain/mental illness
plus a few things listed but i clicked other.-
Chronic illness that is making it harder and harder for me to take care of my most basic needs. I want to leave while I have a little dignity left. My partner has a terminal illness, so I have to stay a little longer to help him through this journey.
Superdeterminist
Enlightened
- Apr 5, 2020
- 1,877
Gromit-CTB
time for ctb
- Nov 14, 2020
- 847
Ditto
Initially it was relationships problems, losing a girl that I honestly believed to be my soulmate. I still love her deeply, but I realize now we were incompatible in a lot of ways along with life generally just throwing us into situations where we couldn't work, ending in distance.
Those feelings, as painful as they are, fade over time. The main reason I'm considering it, or more accurately - holding on to it as an option is just how I -feel-. I don't enjoy much of anything, ctpsd makes life stressful and difficult, and if I don't derive enjoyment or pleasure then what's the purpose for continuing on? I'm trying a bunch of experimental treatments like microdosing and mdma therapy though. Can't CTB unlessI've tried everything and exhausted my options, you know?
Those feelings, as painful as they are, fade over time. The main reason I'm considering it, or more accurately - holding on to it as an option is just how I -feel-. I don't enjoy much of anything, ctpsd makes life stressful and difficult, and if I don't derive enjoyment or pleasure then what's the purpose for continuing on? I'm trying a bunch of experimental treatments like microdosing and mdma therapy though. Can't CTB unlessI've tried everything and exhausted my options, you know?
Dark Spring
Sobreviviendo
- Sep 29, 2020
- 116
There are several reasons, I can summarize that I am tired of my depression, tired of carrying the conscience that my father is an abuser and the whole family covers for him or pretends that nothing happened, tired of trying to study and that everything goes wrong, tired of not getting a job with which to become independent and of living in a country where the possibilities of progressing are less and less. Soon I will run out of money for my antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs that at least make my days lighter.
letmeseethedeath
catching the bus
- Aug 4, 2018
- 465
the love of my life told me goodbye she changed in a couple of days.. so what's the point now of living? i wanna die
Donk
Useless since day 1
- Jan 3, 2020
- 1,129
Clinical Depression. It's a nightmare living inside my head.
Quax
Student
- Nov 16, 2019
- 140
The lack of future.... there's is nothing to come up what would make life worth living....
decafcoffee
Member
- Nov 15, 2019
- 85
its always too much suffering to enjoy life. simple, explains it all. its the same as a sick dog.
peacechoice
Experienced
- Oct 11, 2020
- 205
Yes me too! This!
You are a sweet angel. I thank god that the most important person in my life died young that way, I can also die knowing that she won't suffer.
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Neowise
We fly and fly but never reach our destination.
- Oct 7, 2020
- 455
It's a shame the poll only lets you choose 1 answer. I'd go with lack of self esteem, shit family, hopeless future, being a failure at everything I do and ultimately being bored of living.
@yive
Oh come on, I'm pretty sure that is not the major reason you want to ctb. It's a stereotype that women only care about the size. Maybe some do, just like some men may only care about huge tits. But those are the idiotic ones. A man with self esteem and a gentle character can be quite popular among women. Don't let yourself get reduced to a piece of meat ;)
@yive
Similar thing for you, I think you are trying to get sex too hard until you stress yourself into it and go insane. You should try to put your focus on finding love first, then sex will come naturally. Relax a bit :)
Mental illness is fucking exhausting to live with, and I refuse to take any medication for it. I'm constantly miserable and anxious over how unsure I am over everything. I'm going nowhere in life which is why I want to end it.
Combination bored of living, history of abuse, low quality of life/hopeless future, and financial issues
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I'm going through a divorce and I'm being accused of all sorts of lies and I haven't seen my kids for 6 months and I've got to the point where I am literally tired of living. Life without my kids is a living hell. Facing police action for lies and no one will listen is absolutely horrendous. I'm relived and happy to CBT today.
Dizzylady80
Experienced
- Nov 5, 2020
- 227
Unfortunately no, it's neuropathic so it's hard to treat, and I've been on all sorts of meds with no luck
Death22
If I can stop 1 breeder, I’m happy
- Nov 25, 2020
- 45
Misanthrope
Mage
- Oct 23, 2018
- 557
Pain is winning over love. I also live in a country that may as well admit it views the disabled as useless eaters. This cruelty can only get worse as further cuts bite and austerity is further adopted with greater zeal. Already lost crucial care hours. Feel like a ghost just watching life move around me. Sickness robs me of interacting meaningfully and quality of life standards can only go into greater decline with further time. Not terminal though. I am afraid of future pains and loss of more dignity. I am weary of being pitied. As well as with the boredom that comes with not having much of a mind to concentrate with. It is all so tedious.
Deleted member 24152
"Dying Is an art, like everything else."
- Nov 24, 2020
- 20
Chronic diseases, BPD, eternal pain and loneliness for 9 years. Medicines make it worse. I'm so tired and I don't see the future.
For now it's because I don't see my life getting drastically better, but the upkeep of merely existing seems to get harder as the years go by. It's like I'm watching a movie and I already know how it's going to play out, so I don't need to see it through to the end anymore.
That said, if somebody gave me a lot of money to burn that would allow me to try new things and I would stay a little longer.
That said, if somebody gave me a lot of money to burn that would allow me to try new things and I would stay a little longer.
It seems that the fear that everything might get better in the future is the only thing keeping me alive. Its probably just SI.
Lost.
Antidepressants and antipsychotics are posion
- Feb 13, 2020
- 173
Permanent neurological consequences from psych meds and the antiemetic injection.
Maybe you should graduly come off meds. When i was on zoloft, it had ruined me and had made me pretty suicidal, i didnt know it was zoloft, i thought it was depression. But actualy deep inside i suspected it was zoloft. And yes, it was zoloft, i realised that when i came off.
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MaThomp
Member
- Dec 1, 2020
- 5
Living just aint for some people, me included. But my dumbass is too lazy even to kill themself lol. along side with a lot of other reasons.
