writing notes is way harder than i thought it would be

[comeoutandhauntme]

i was procrastinating as usual and deicded to start trying to draft out some of my notes. in my head the notes were always easy to write and all the things i wanted to say and feelings i wanted to convey just seem to flow naturally out of me. but actually sitting down to write them is incredibly difficult. it's like all of a sudden i've lost the ability to remember words and nothing's actually able to transfer from my brain to the paper. i want these notes to be perfect, bc ik it'll be their final reminder of me, and trying to write everything exactly the way i want it written is so difficult. ugh. i wish i could just immediately trasnfer the idea and concept of the notes i have in my head onto the page without actually having to write it out, if that even makes sense.