My younger self never expected to live beyond my early twenties, so I don't know if pride would have encompassed any response. Confusion maybe. I adamantly equated failures in school with my own so I am not sure how I would have stomached those patterns continuing into my thirties (that would have been the end of it, because no way would I humiliate myself any further than I had already been humiliated, or continuously fail despite my best efforts with no feel-good moment of accomplishment).
I think I would have been distressed by suicide not being an exclusively personal issue or something very specific to my own issues or inability to succeed in life. Unable to believe my conceptions of failure had been more conditioned than not, that I'd struggle with greater ethical dilemmas than whether or not I could finish school. That suicidal inclinations sort of lightened but people got worse through adulthood rather than peaking at a teenage level of sociopathy. That despite their flaws, my parents were probably, on average, better people than any of the public figures I sought comfort in. That an inability to secure a career was still somehow better than developing a personality that seems to plague society's preferred voices and public intellectuals. And that, even without a basis of comparison, my daily accomplishments often go hand in hand with continuing to harm (maybe moreso than my failures or inabilities).
I know it's a somewhat therapeutic technique to imagine knowing what we know now, but my younger self had enough struggles and I would rather leave them alone to deal with school-related struggles, depression and suicide rather than updated versions of future harm. "You thought school was bad" would have only invalidated what was very severe and unusual at the time, even though in retrospect it seems like a very distant and trivial concern.
