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Morgana

Morgana

Widow.
Mar 21, 2019
12
My closest family members know my intentions, but I have complied with the things they've begged of me, (medication, speaking to people, etc.,) because I know if they hadn't at least felt they did the most they could, they'd spend their lives wondering what they could have done to stop me. So now, they have all made it clear they've decided to continue on as though I won't be doing it at all because I'm wanting to "recover".
I haven't fed into this at all. They're deciding to believe. It makes me wonder if I should allow it and feed into it so they can relax and enjoy their lives, or pressure the point that I'm leaving soon.
Would you rather know your loved one was going to die soon, so you could spend extra time, maybe having experiences together you wouldn't have normally... Perhaps take a trip, have a few more dinners together. Run up some credit cards and try the caviar, type stuff... or would you rather not know, so that you could enjoy your life instead of spending weeks, maybe months, scared every night that you'll go to sleep and wake up and suddenly they're gone and you can't say goodbye?
I can't decide if I should let them live in ignorant bliss, or drive the point home a bit so they can make peace and feel, if not happy, at least comfortable, with the fact that they were able to prepare for the goodbye.
 
W

wheresthepizzza

Member
Apr 7, 2019
7
I don't think one could ever "prepare for the goodbye". Instead of spending the last few weeks enjoying it with you, I think they would spend that time trying to change your mind to stay. I think if I knew I only had a few weeks left, with someone before they ctb, it would be an anxiety, depressing couple weeks. I would say, do not tell them. But to enjoy and spend the last weeks with them, making them feel loved and re assuring them that you love them. Thats just my two cent. Good luck with whatever you decide. You know your family better than anyone, go with your gut.
 
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Severen

Severen

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,819
Both options pretty much suck for people who actually care about you. If they know you CTBed. Then they are going to feel like shit. But if you just disappear on them, then they will also feel like shit...
 

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