Discussion Would you still ctb if you won the lottery tmr?

[troubled_puppet]

i'd put my immediate family (two in my case for now) in a modest house in a nice quiet neighborhood, paid for. i'd put them on a regular predictable monthly income for bills taxes, hoa, yard care and groceries.

Spoiler: petty bs; tldr i'd make a family fund for my extended family who abandoned us

then i'd make a family fund for the damn extended family who didn't give a fck about us. i'd pay some finance person to make some quarterly dividend that all people eligible to have a living so they know i'm the person who would take care of them even if they never would have taken care of me or my parents. i dont want to see their faces. i dont want their apologies. i dont want to buy their guilt. i want them to know i'm shutting the doors on them while still making sure they know i have the funds to take care of them.

then i'd formalize my Last Will and Testament and make sure that no one can fck with my stuff when im gone.

maybe at that point i'd CBT.

but if im still around. i'd reinvest and make indie games. rent a studio, hire people. have yearly stretch goals to donate to charities in big sums. maybe make up cool charity events, "feed the gamers" inititive or something, or boost tech literacy programs in my local area. make cool platformers. make cool weird indie games. i want to work with cool people. i dunno. that's the pipe dream.

 

[deadofdespair]

When I think about it now, the answer is no. But I think in reality if it was to happen the thoughts would return. I have been cursed.

 

[sacrilegeofsouls]

I'm not talking about 1k or even 10k. Hypothetically, if you got life changing money like 10M bucks after taxes and everything would you still decide to ctb? Whether the answer is yes or no, what would you like to do with the money?

In my case, there are just some things I can't change even with that amount of money. I can't change who my parents are. I can't change how I feel about myself. I can't change my past. I honestly don't even feel the desire to change anything in life ever since I've made up my mind. However, I would probably delay my exit. I still wish to enjoy the world one last time before I go, so if I do end up with life-changing money, I would like to travel around the world. I'd like to see the Earth one last time. In the end, I don't think my decision to ctb will change. I have no regrets and nothing left to live for so it would only end up delaying my plan just like any other unforeseen circumstance.

gonna Use that to make more money have tons of fun and also organise the most expensive and theatrical suicide ever

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

yes i would still kill myself

money would help me do a more private and more reliable suicide away from humans

 

[tamamshud107]

I would definitely take a pause. Do all the things I've never had the means to do. Bless some people who need a hand. Then, yes, I'll always end up finding most comfort in death. It'll just postpone it, a bit.

 

[bb142342]

If that dream were to come true, I would definitely put those thoughts off until much, much later—say, if my messed-up back started giving me real trouble or the aches and pains of old age really set in.

But for now, winning the lottery would solve the vast majority of my problems, because I could quit that damn job and live entirely for my hobbies and leisure time.

 

[flowersforalgernons]

hahahahhah no

i wouldnt have to work, i could buy a house, hire a personal trainer and dietician, get all my teeth fixed, go to school

 

[vanillacakeyyy]

it'd make me reconsider it and id be happy to finally afford things i want while finally paying others back. but i'd write a will for my family just in case since my mental state is unpredictable

 

[Ultimatefighter]

I would buy myself a pet clinic, order nembutal in ten fold and drink it all

 

[Neosisyphean]

I would still do it the same way; money would only make me feel emptier than I already do.

 

[limenlux]

I can't purchase my way out of physical disability, so I would still wish to end things, but I could purchase euthanasia as a new method. While sorting through that process I would acquire comfortable housing (as I have recently become homeless in addition to my mind and body both being in tatters) and treat myself to a little material pleasure before passing. Ultimately, I would leave the vast majority of the money to a few people who have been kind and helped me and some charitable causes in which I believe.

 

[alphabetsoupz]

I'd waste it rapidly then ctb. Go out on a bang.

 

[AgathaChristieLover]

I'd give it all to a charity that helps mentally ill people then kill myself, I don't want anyone else to experience my pain

 

[suncide10]

I don't know. If I got 10 million dollars I would move from my country and start a new life trying to forget my past. If it'll get better for me then I'd stay alive.

 

[franklyditto]

Woth that money i can fly to county that have legal assist sucide so it will not be painful.Maybe before dying i want to go to some places that i cant go before because i don't have money,it will make a happy ending for me die at the best moment i can ask for. As for the rest money i will give it to my family so i don't have to worry about them.

 

[pk@2001]

Any materialistic thing can't undo my resolve for ctb, be it 100$ or 10 million $.
The way life has unfolded for me in the past 6 years, i don't belive the scars, trauma and in return the ultimate salvation through ctb can't be undone through any materialistic thing.

 

[starboy2k]

uhhh yea.
money doesn't change how annoying life is.

 

[unluckysadness]

I play the lottery (only 2 or 3 times a month) because we never know... If I win, it will stimulate my brain to do things and buy stuff for some months, but it in the end it won't make me happy because my health issues won't disappear. It will give me more stress but my plan is to give a lot of money to people in need. My dream is to win the lottery and help SaSu people who could avoid ctb with money. And giving a lot of cash to homeless people first. I read some threads about ctb because of financial reasons. So sad if it's the only reason.

That said, I just realize that I forgot to play for tomorrow. If I win, the story would be awesome... But it won't happen so I don't need to care about.

 

[rorosbones]

honestly, i don't think so. money can't fix my mental health, but it could definitely make my life a lot better. that amount would probably keep me going for a while, even if i did decide to ctb later on

 

[dwindull]

Money can't fix what's wrong with me. It'd more than likely be a hollow existence.

 

[saddo]

I'd love to be able to leave knowing my family are financially secure. Loads of people say that winning the lottery made their lives worse! I don't honestly know if it would make a difference. Maybe we can't know unless we're actually in that position. Money wouldn't fix all or even most of my problems tbh so I don't think it would change anything

 

[shun75x]

Probably yes, but I'd put it off. There's so much to do with that money first, lol

 

[evrlastingsea]

yes! i'd still ctb. i'll spend that money however i want and i ctb. easy

 

[valar_morghulis21]

I'm not talking about 1k or even 10k. Hypothetically, if you got life changing money like 10M bucks after taxes and everything would you still decide to ctb? Whether the answer is yes or no, what would you like to do with the money?

In my case, there are just some things I can't change even with that amount of money. I can't change who my parents are. I can't change how I feel about myself. I can't change my past. I honestly don't even feel the desire to change anything in life ever since I've made up my mind. However, I would probably delay my exit. I still wish to enjoy the world one last time before I go, so if I do end up with life-changing money, I would like to travel around the world. I'd like to see the Earth one last time. In the end, I don't think my decision to ctb will change. I have no regrets and nothing left to live for so it would only end up delaying my plan just like any other unforeseen circumstance.

It will buy me some good times. I'll share the majority of them with my family. Donating some for good causes. Then I'll go travelling for a while and when I decide it's time to go, will ctb and hopefully with money it will be easier. The decide to ctb is finalized cause I've been through enough to know that it will always come back

 

[BirdWatcher]

Interesting to see this thread, because I had planned to play the lottery this week. As some kind of last ditched effort. But honestl, even if I were to win it would probably only delay my CTB. I have a chronic illness that no money in the world can heal. I'm at a point now where even just sitting upright at the desk to play video games is difficult, so I don't really have much to live for anyway.

So I guess if I won the lottery I would use the money to make myself a few nice moths, and then CTB in peace.

 

[otomedissection]

In a way, it could fix a lot of problems for me, but I think it'd make everything worse too. I already have a hard time believing anyone when they say they care about me and love me, but if I heard them say that when I had money?? Lots of money that could potentially be given to them if they sweet talk me enough?? There's no way I could live like that. It'd be impossible to hide too. I'd rather it go to someone else or to a charity.

 

[DeadManLiving]

A lack of money made me suicidal after I failed in life. Winning the lottery jackpot would certainly solve this problem, and the bus ticket can be torn apart. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't CTB for other reasons in the future if they cannot be solved with money.

Same

 

[MrMegalomaniac]

Maybe it would prologue my stay to see life from this new, more "grandiose" perspective.
But materialism has never and could never change my mind on leaving.

 

[Tired_birth_1967]

The money would afford me complete isolation. Not needing any human interaction would truly buy me some extra time, though I don't know for how long. What I would certainly do is use the money to gain access to peaceful means of dying.

 

[TCD]

Almost certainly. Bad luck has never really been my problem.