
Desdemona
Member
- Oct 14, 2020
- 88
Does anyone worry that if they CTB they'll end up being reborn in another terrible life even worse than now?
One thing that kills me is compared to a large part of the world I'm fairly privileged. I don't consider myself good looking but overall I'm meh. I'm not super smart or anything but I have a degree and a descent job. My parents weren't the best growing up but they weren't abusive and they really did their best. I didn't grow up super wealthy, maybe lower middle class. All aspects of my life have just been very average.
I've always suffered with depression and not fitting in but that was whatever. Chronic illness is what's making me want to CBT and I just cant shake this feeling that I'll end up in horrible circumstances as punishment, like wven more severely disabled living in a 3rd world country with abusive parents. Actually I have a huge list of Possible scenarios
I guess my point is that if it wasn't for my chronic illnesses, I'd probably have an "ok" life but with the way things currently are I can't go on. I'm in my twenties and basically housebound/tortured with pain daily and I'm going crazy
I essentially caused my illnesses so I feel incredibly guilty that I have this relatively good life and basically messed it all up
One thing that kills me is compared to a large part of the world I'm fairly privileged. I don't consider myself good looking but overall I'm meh. I'm not super smart or anything but I have a degree and a descent job. My parents weren't the best growing up but they weren't abusive and they really did their best. I didn't grow up super wealthy, maybe lower middle class. All aspects of my life have just been very average.
I've always suffered with depression and not fitting in but that was whatever. Chronic illness is what's making me want to CBT and I just cant shake this feeling that I'll end up in horrible circumstances as punishment, like wven more severely disabled living in a 3rd world country with abusive parents. Actually I have a huge list of Possible scenarios
I guess my point is that if it wasn't for my chronic illnesses, I'd probably have an "ok" life but with the way things currently are I can't go on. I'm in my twenties and basically housebound/tortured with pain daily and I'm going crazy
I essentially caused my illnesses so I feel incredibly guilty that I have this relatively good life and basically messed it all up
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