Story Work will set you free

[irememberinnocence]

I can relate to the practical side of things. I actually enjoy my hobbies, passions, amateur research projects and so on A LOT. If I'm really absorbed in something then I'll happily go days without speaking to someone. But this is my undoing as well. I don't have much social capital. People mistreat me and I refuse to be a doormat unless I see no other way. I like people's company but I find them extremely frustrating and cannot get along with anyone in the longterm it seems. I also don't find anyone who has the same set of values as me. There's always clashing and conflict. I never get to just feel safe and enjoy a friendship. But on a practical level, it makes life extremely difficult. The simplest tasks or bureaucracies turn into huge stresses and shadows due to having no no one to fall back on. I'm not encouraging you to suicide if your life does end up coming undone. I'm saying I know what it's like to not mind being bound up in your own little world but at the same time needing other people for practical reasons. Basically the great human conundrum. Life can be fine and even much less drama free when alone, but there are times when we need to rely on our fellow humans, and then for some of us, there is no no one there.