will vodka kill me in the end?

[counting-out-time]

Hi all


Been here for a while and I do like a drink some times, well some weekends, or more to the point - everyday!


I know alcohol kills the brain cells and the liver, and can can end up with alcohol poisoning if prolonged for extended periods of time, my question is although I drink a lot of ethanol, how long do you think it will be till I get rushed into hospital with the diagnosis of liver failure? anytime I have money to spend, I spend it on vodka and what I'm hoping for is to be told by a doc is that I have liver failure and if the case then no I do not want a transplant. just pull out the plug!

I also tried to kill myself with downing a bottle of vodka in one go a few times but i just ended up passing out and being sick while still asleep (hoping I'd choke on my own vomit) but woke up to a big mess.


I suppose the main question is what are your views on liver failure and also i do smoke, for enjoyment and for the fact that I'm inhaling toxic chemicals to slowly kill myself. i do feel for the others who do smoke and drink and want to live but i do not want to live no longer and to be honest just waiting to let life take it's toll on my body and go to the other side.

oh and p.s. i did also try to OD on coke but just ended up with a sore nose and banging headache, seems like life wants to you to live and suffer pain until we all get old of some sort of natural killer. but
tbh it would be good if i went on a rollercoaster at say Alton towers and all the bolts came lose while doing 70MPH and went head first into a concrete floor, SHIT i have a dark mind!

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Forget alcohol poisening, liver failure, OD. That's not gonna work. The human body can resist longer than you hope for and it might also be painful with low chances to succeed. You may want to look into other more promissing methods here.

 

[dimstar]

I drink and smoke like you, have been for a long time. Partial as a distraction/ way to cope but also because like the idea every drink every puff is bringing my end closer. I too want the doc to tell me my liver is failing not as a way to die but I guess a more understandable reason for those I leave behind. Also a final push to say yep you've been fantasizing it for years and now it's really time. Anyway cheers, keep drinking if you really dont want to live I dont see any downside maybe we can get lucky and one day our poisons will catch up with us.

 

[picklemick]

becoming an addict is a long road many accidentally and some on purpose take to ctb. I use alcohol to make my life so miserable that I must ctb. But then those options were taken from me. Now I'm just an alcoholic.

It actually is insane how hard it is to die. But then the people with the most love for life and are loved by everyone just die.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I do drink sometimes but only cider and I don't like hard core stuff, but anyway if you can't do OD there is a method megathread with all the resources to complete ctb. I truly hope you successfully complete ctb if that is your wish and if you don't want to or not sure maybe you try to get help . Whatever you do, so what's best for you.

 

[picklemick]

I did rehab. I was sober for 8 months. Life was actually good. But the impeding doom of A mental breakdown that came. It was all for nothing

I do drink sometimes but only cider and I don't like hard core stuff, but anyway if you can't do OD there is a method megathread with all the resources to complete ctb. I truly hope you successfully complete ctb if that is your wish and if you don't want to or not sure maybe you try to get help . Whatever you do, so what's best for you.

I drink rarely. When I do it's because life has become too much... again. I know it's not on Stan's guide but I was getting fucked up to surpasss the si of drinking sn

I did rehab. I was sober for 8 months. Life was actually good. But the impeding doom of A mental breakdown that came. It was all for nothing

I drink rarely. When I do it's because life has become too much... again. I know it's not on Stan's guide but I was getting fucked up to surpasss the si of drinking sn

 

[counting-out-time]

I do drink sometimes but only cider and I don't like hard core stuff, but anyway if you can't do OD there is a method megathread with all the resources to complete ctb. I truly hope you successfully complete ctb if that is your wish and if you don't want to or not sure maybe you try to get help . Whatever you do, so what's best for you.

thanks you :) I know it seems selfish where others want to live and enjoy life but I do not want to take part in this part of life and would be happier to skip the shit, at some point in my life, I learned that some people make it, others don't and I'm that person. however its not fair that for the ones who don't make it have to suffer in life trying to cope with failure and no progress while others enjoy life with happiness and good things in their life. I always rant to myself that we never had the choice to be born nor the choice to die but then again, if we never chose to be born then shouldn't we have the choice to leave this life. just like a bug or ant would get stepped on and die, i wish i was a bug! sorry for ranting on.

 

[The anhedonic one]

I used to be an alcoholic.
I drank 3 bottles of 13 per cent proof red wine every day for 14 months.
I eventually ended up hospitalised with severe yellow jaundice, malnutrition and several other ailments.
I finally gave up drinking and recovered.
It will take a long time to die from alcohol. Except in the case of severe alcohol poisoning.

 

[picklemick]

I used to be an alcoholic.
I drank 3 bottles of 13 per cent proof red wine every day for 14 months.
I eventually ended up hospitalised with severe yellow jaundice, malnutrition and several other ailments.
I finally gave up drinking and recovered.
It will take a long time to die from alcohol. Except in the case of severe alcohol poisoning.

Can I ask why you recovered if you're on a suicide forum?

 

[picklemick]

I couldn't agree more. I went to rehab last year. I was like I'm going to rehab so hard. I will get through this.

 

[picklemick]

But then was still suicidal after feeling like you did everything. Sounds like a scam. And just to be clear I went 7!weeks zero substances

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

thanks you :) I know it seems selfish where others want to live and enjoy life but I do not want to take part in this part of life and would be happier to skip the shit, at some point in my life, I learned that some people make it, others don't and I'm that person. however its not fair that for the ones who don't make it have to suffer in life trying to cope with failure and no progress while others enjoy life with happiness and good things in their life. I always rant to myself that we never had the choice to be born nor the choice to die but then again, if we never chose to be born then shouldn't we have the choice to leave this life. just like a bug or ant would get stepped on and die, i wish i was a bug! sorry for ranting on.

Good for those pro lifers that "enjoy" life truly good for them. As for myself I'm looking forward to my eternal peace just how it was like before I was born. I hope happiness continues for them till death takes them away since nobody knows when their ending unless for us pro ctb who choose our own ending.

I can also understand why you think life is not fair there is people like Beyoncé who is both very wealthy and beautiful and then is someone who I know is a "group admin" his biggest accomplishment to date and when I think of these two I truly can understand why you think life is so unfair…..

Anyway I wish you all the best with whatever decision you make.

 

[Worndown]

Alcohol can kill you but is not that easy. Some can last 30 or 40 years before it finally gets them.

 

[picklemick]

It's a good numb of having to deal with life: ooops you had too much si, drink until you don't

 

[I wish I were a cat]

That Chinese influencer just drunk so many bottles he died..