Why wont my anxiety kill me

[downndone2]

My anxiety is causing everything miserable! Rapid heart beat, agorophobia, insomnia, nightmares, sweating, difficulty breathing, dizziness, etc. Why won't it just fucking kill me? I just want to die!!! I'm so miserable every second of every damn day and most of the night.

 

[Myauka]

I agree, this world can feel lke hell sometimes.

 

[downndone2]

I agree, this world can feel lke hell sometimes.

It is near constant anxiety. I get slight relief eating and sleeping. Otherwise,I'm in so much misery.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds really horrific what you have to go through, it's just so awful how the human body can torture people so much yet not cause them to finally rest forever. There certainly is no peace from suffering to be found as long as one exists here. But anyway, I hope that you eventually find freedom from your torment.

 

[downndone2]

I'm literally just laying here with non-stop tossing abd turning for the last 24 hrs in anxiety. It just gets worse and worse. I don't think I can make it thru the week.. I wish I had more medicine I could od on. I do believe I'll order sn today. I ruined my life and then some...

 

[Dolphin55]

I'm literally just laying here with non-stop tossing abd turning for the last 24 hrs in anxiety. It just gets worse and worse. I don't think I can make it thru the week.. I wish I had more medicine I could od on. I do believe I'll order sn today. I ruined my life and then some...

is there any medication or therapy you could try? It's not normal to be in that amount of anxiety and you shouldnt have to live like that. I had a time awhile back that where I was also in near-constant anxiety, it's hell, please get help

 

[downndone2]

is there any medication or therapy you could try? It's not normal to be in that amount of anxiety and you shouldnt have to live like that. I had a time awhile back that where I was also in near-constant anxiety, it's hell, please get help

I've tried it all. I literally lost almost everything several years back and don't know how to get past it. I'm placing my order for SN now

 

[Dolphin55]

I've tried it all. I literally lost almost everything several years back and don't know how to get past it. I'm placing my order for SN now

im so sorry. hopefully you can find peace

 

[Foxes]

I also suffer from near constant anxiety and I agree, it's the worst. Nothing feels good. Everything makes you want to pull your hair out or jump right out of your skin. No relief from it unless you take something for it or, in my case, try to sleep it all away.

Hugs to you. I hope you find some form of respite from all of it soon.

 

[NambaSutra]

Good luck to you. I'm also in a constant state of anxiety and anger with no relief. I've tried therapy, medications, all sort of things, but life is a living hell every single day I wake up, say "oh shit I'm awake" and then just while away the hours until I can go to sleep 18 hours later. And I wake up several times every night with more of the same.

 

[Galileo3630]

Have you tried music? I'm basically constantly over-thinking and dwelling on the future and hating the past, but music always seems to help

 

[qwerty1969]

I am the same re anxiety it's currently 3:35am and I can't sleep anymore tonight even though I will try because I essentially stay in bed 24 hours a day. Never shower. Get food delivered. Have a lady that helps me with stuff that needs to be done that I can't do. My biggest problem is the horrific dreams I have when I sleep which I am certain is a result of medications I took, no one seems to talk about this dream medication side effect. I also feel as though these drugs have ruined my life. I had a truly blessed life until the day I took the medication which all came about from a botched medical procedure which I didn't even need. I have always considered myself a supreme problem solver and I have spent the last year and a half thinking nonstop about how to solve my predicament but unfortunately my conclusion is that I have no choice but to find a way to end my life asap.

 

[downndone2]

I also suffer from near constant anxiety and I agree, it's the worst. Nothing feels good. Everything makes you want to pull your hair out or jump right out of your skin. No relief from it unless you take something for it or, in my case, try to sleep it all away.

Hugs to you. I hope you find some form of respite from all of it soon.

I have a few things I take but they suck. No one wants to prescribe me benzos. I try to sleep but have odd dreams and then I wake quickly with more freaking anxiety.
I placed order for SN from CCS. If nothing else, I have it 4 back up. I fear it'll be harder and harder to get soon. Shit, it already is. I remember when you could order from Amazon

 

[Foxes]

I have a few things I take but they suck. No one wants to prescribe me benzos. I try to sleep but have odd dreams and then I wake quickly with more freaking anxiety.
I placed order for SN from CCS. If nothing else, I have it 4 back up. I fear it'll be harder and harder to get soon. Shit, it already is. I remember when you could order from Amazon

I have some old benzos stashed away for when I intend to do the deed, so I have to rely on other things that have been prescribed to me over the years that don't do much for me either. I also experience very vivid dreams that tend to make me feel worse when I wake up. Everything about this process is painful and irritating.

I used to try to use audiobooks or some kind of video on YouTube to help me relax, but lately everything's been getting on my nerves and I just want to scream.

My SN is actually from Amazon. Glad I got it when I did. Do you plan on using AEs and/or anything else in your regime?

 

[downndone2]

I have some old benzos stashed away for when I intend to do the deed, so I have to rely on other things that have been prescribed to me over the years that don't do much for me either. I also experience very vivid dreams that tend to make me feel worse when I wake up. Everything about this process is painful and irritating.

I used to try to use audiobooks or some kind of video on YouTube to help me relax, but lately everything's been getting on my nerves and I just want to scream.

My SN is actually from Amazon. Glad I got it when I did. Do you plan on using AEs and/or anything else in your regime?

Yes, I have benzos andmeto here already. I bought from CCS

 

[Foxes]

I am the same re anxiety it's currently 3:35am and I can't sleep anymore tonight even though I will try because I essentially stay in bed 24 hours a day. Never shower. Get food delivered.

I'm in a very similar situation currently. I'm having trouble eating on a consistent basis and am only doing it for some small boost of energy to try to get some of my affairs in order. Even then, it's hard for me to get out of bed.

I'm so sorry to hear about the medications ruining your quality of life. It's hard to read about situations like yours because it feels as though your life has been snatched away at the hands of some really reckless and thoughtless practitioners. It really isn't right nor is it fair. My heart goes out to you. I read a few of your previous postings, are you still going to travel to a remote location?

Yes, I have benzos abs meto here already

I woke up this morning feeling absolute dread in the pit of my stomach. I mean, that's usually the case anyway but this was different. Knowing that I'm actively taking the steps (however slowly...) to secure my end is a harrowing experience. The SI is insane and very real for me.

 

[qwerty1969]

I am here at the location now contemplating drowning. Wishing you the best too.

 

[Foxes]

I am here at the location now contemplating drowning. Wishing you the best too.

I had seen you mention SN as well, have you abandoned that plan?

Thinking about the ocean swallowing me whole is both a beautiful and terrifying thought. I hope you're doing okay.

 

[downndone2]

Yes, I have benzos abs meto here already

Sorry to hear

I am the same re anxiety it's currently 3:35am and I can't sleep anymore tonight even though I will try because I essentially stay in bed 24 hours a day. Never shower. Get food delivered. Have a lady that helps me with stuff that needs to be done that I can't do. My biggest problem is the horrific dreams I have when I sleep which I am certain is a result of medications I took, no one seems to talk about this dream medication side effect. I also feel as though these drugs have ruined my life. I had a truly blessed life until the day I took the medication which all came about from a botched medical procedure which I didn't even need. I have always considered myself a supreme problem solver and I have spent the last year and a half thinking nonstop about how to solve my predicament but unfortunately my conclusion is that I have no choice but to find a way to end my life asap.

I'm so sorry about your situation. I suffer from medical and physical issues. I literally threw away my perfect life years ago after some awful decisions i made. I do partially withdrawal off meds I had been taking for years.

I also stay in bed most all day and my self-care is awful. I am supposed to start job soon but I think I may ctb before that. I know the anxiety will only follow me there and ugh

All i know is I lost life as I knew it and I'm having a hard time ever since. I just cant keep on with the crippling anxiety like this

Feel free to message me, but I am negativity lol

 

[qwerty1969]

Waiting on SN delivery. It may end up being needed. To be honest I have doubts and concerns about every CTB method.

 

[downndone2]

Waiting on SN delivery. It may end up being needed. To be honest I have doubts and concerns about every CTB method.

I hear ya, I've had firearm and also have opiates. I'm afraid of misfire and don't think opiates are enough

 

[qwerty1969]

If I had a gun I would be dead already.

 

[Kta1994]

Insomnia induced by anxiety its the worse, the days i get 0 sleep are the days i want to die the most

 

[downndone2]

If I had a gun I would be dead already.

I suppose I just know it'll be messy. I'm afraid of misfire, etc. It's an option but damn

 

[qwerty1969]

I suppose I just know it'll be messy. I'm afraid of misfire, etc. It's an option but damn

I would keep shooting untill I was dead and I would happily pay someone to shoot me until I was dead.

 

[downndone2]

If I had a gun I would be dead already.

I suppose I just know it'll be messy. I'm afraid of misfire, etc. It's an option but da

I would keep shooting untill I was dead and I would happily pay someone to shoot me until I was dead.

I don't want to use it inside the house and feel like the entire neighborhood will be traumatized if I do it outside
Don't have enough money to pay hit man
I'd certainly kppe shooting after initial shot if I could