Venting WHY THE FUCK AM I STILL HERE????????????????????????

[Unattainable666]

I'm so tired so fucking tired. Tired of life; tired of people; tired of the assholes i have to deal with; tired of breathing; tired of worry about paychecks, bills, cars, rent, work, etc. etc. etc. I have my method all ready. It's underneath the sink right now calling my name. I will go quickly and painlessly. I have nothing here (I know I know here she is bitching again and feeling sorry for herself). I have nothing. I have no home, no friends, no special someone, fucking hate the shit job, the shit apartment run by nazis who continually send me smart ass emails, no hope, no faith, I just don't care anymore. I'm so tired I don't care. Why am I still here? SI? How can I overcome SI? Please someone help me show me how to overcome SI so I can leave and go home where I belong with Chris and my Dad. I'm so old and tired. I just want it to end.

 

[hikikomorizombie]

like u, i also have absolutely nothing & no reason to keep going. like u, the only thing stopping me is SI & the fear. my method's jumping, & tbh i feel like that makes it 100x worse + harder to overcome, but i don't have anything else available.

i wish there was a quick & easy way to overcome SI that wasn't being unconscious ://

 

[Unattainable666]

like u, i also have absolutely nothing & no reason to keep going. like u, the only thing stopping me is SI & the fear. my method's jumping, & tbh i feel like that makes it 100x worse + harder to overcome, but i don't have anything else available.

i wish there was a quick & easy way to overcome SI that wasn't being unconscious ://

Luckily I'm very spontaneous. I'm hoping that I get so depressed one day that I decide to just ctb and never look back.

 

[iusedtobehappy]

SI is definitely a thing. That and what happens if it fails. That is what gets in my way. I was thinking about this earlier. Well I think about it all the time but this thought came to me. We don't know how much our bodies will fight something. So when we take or inhale chemicals or wrap something around our necks, we don't know for sure what will happen. We know it's supposed to do the trick, but my thought was we don't know how hard our bodies will fight. It's not like we can do a trial run. It's like the guy who was just executed. His body found hard against something that is supposed to be so peaceful. Honestly it's a scary thought.

I understand exactly how you feel. If there was a pill (well I guess technically at one time there was) that we could take, peacefully go to sleep just like we normally would and not wake up, I don't think most of us would be here.

For now (well really always) be good to yourself.

 

[socrates]

I know the feeling I wish, I wasn't here either, my first date was in 2020, but I'm still here. I have a new one later this year. I just hope I don't chicken out. What is your method if you don't mind sharing?

 

[FuneralCry]

It's certainly understandable feeling so tired of suffering in this existence, I hope that you eventually find the peace you search for.

 

[mia_qwerty]

I wonder the same thing

 

[sanction]

I'm so tired so fucking tired. Tired of life; tired of people; tired of the assholes i have to deal with; tired of breathing; tired of worry about paychecks, bills, cars, rent, work, etc. etc. etc. I have my method all ready. It's underneath the sink right now calling my name. I will go quickly and painlessly. I have nothing here (I know I know here she is bitching again and feeling sorry for herself). I have nothing. I have no home, no friends, no special someone, fucking hate the shit job, the shit apartment run by nazis who continually send me smart ass emails, no hope, no faith, I just don't care anymore. I'm so tired I don't care. Why am I still here? SI? How can I overcome SI? Please someone help me show me how to overcome SI so I can leave and go home where I belong with Chris and my Dad. I'm so old and tired. I just want it to end.

Sorry to hear about your pain. You're not alone

Just curious, you mentioned it is underneath the sink. Is it SN?

 

[Doemu]

I really hope you can find your way to freedom and peace.

I think SI only can be overcomed only when someone hates being alive more than SI wants they alive.